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Universal System
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Default Dec 31, 2019 at 07:15 AM
  #1
Hello, my name is Elen. I'm the co-host of a system with Dissociative Identity Disorder. Don't worry about us revealing any names here as no one would ever be able to identify us in real life by that. Only two alters actually identify with the legal name of the body and they're both currently dormant anyway.

I only split off a few months ago due to stress from James' (James being the System host) ex-girlfriend which has been a consistent problem ever since they broke up about 5-6 years ago. (Please do not leave suggestions about what he should do without knowing the full story.)

I was going to share more but that might be triggering and it's really not my story to tell. I'm just letting you essentially what my job is... mostly just to handle interactions with the ex-girlfriend.

That said... I fronted for the time when she wasn't around about three days ago. James has been having stress dreams/nightmares and as co-host I just sort of took over I guess. We've been discussing going back to therapy for a while but there's a couple issues.

We have no job, no money, no insurance. Even when we had a job, James was working BELOW the minimum wage for a theater company. (Stage, not a Cinema) It also seems that local therapists are not even aware of what Dissociative Identity Disorder is. One of our neighbors even mentioned having recently finished all her therapy courses in college and they were still referring to it as Multiple Personality Disorder. From what we've learned online it hasn't been called that since the 90's but yet that's also what our therapist called it when we were first diagnosed in 2003.

Since I'm fronting and have some privacy to do so I've decided to take the intuitive and try to find some form of free therapy options online. I've run into some issues there as well. The best option I could find was this forum.

Even here there are some things that seem concerning to me.

1. The sign up process was very singular focuses. What's your gender for example. How am I suppose to answer that? We don't all share the same gender. I'm a woman in a man's body but not exactly trans either because I share a body with mostly male alters. Sexual orientation. Again kind of a confusing question when the options are straight, gay, or bi and you have 40 people in your head. We're all attracted to women but some of us are women so it really depends on who you ask.

Then there's the question are you here for yourself or someone else... How was I suppose to answer that? I'm here for someone else but that someone else happens to live in the same body as me.

2. You have Dissociative Identity Disorder abbreviated to MPD. Which I get it, it use to be known as Multiple Personality Disorder, that's still how most people know it by, but it's DID now and I'm not sure how welcoming you're going to be to a DID system when I'm already kinda put off just setting up an account that wants to treat us as a singular individual.

That might just be limitations in the system or something so I figure, it's at least worth a try. I'll introduce myself and if things go well maybe the others will follow and start posting on this account as well.

Anyway... if anyone is a therapist or can recommend a good therapist... Preferences in no specific order...

DID Specialist (Duh)


Non-religious (Most of us are Atheist though there are a few religious alters we'd really prefer someone who is Atheist or at the very least is not going to bring up their personal beliefs unprovoked.)


Female (There are certain subjects we'd feel more comfortable discussing with a woman.)

Free (Again, we have no way to pay for anything.)

Online (Since therapists in my general area seem uneducated or out of date on my specific issues and our personal situation makes it difficult to meet in person anyway this really seems to be the best option for us.)
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Default Jan 01, 2020 at 02:05 AM
  #2
Discussing Dissociation | Thoughts from a DID Systems Specialist to learn more about DID and peer support, might be helpful
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Default Jan 01, 2020 at 02:44 AM
  #3
Being a part of a DID community has been helpful. We've made some friends with other Systems in the past year. The thing is though we don't wanna completely rely on that alone cause though it hasn't happened yet, we could potentially accidentally trigger each other. They have their own problems to deal with so what we really need is a therapist. Someone we can talk to openly about personal issues that might be triggering to other trauma survivors who are still dealing with similar issues of their own.

BTW totally unrelated but at the top of the page on this forum there's a Community tab with a number. The number keeps changing anywhere from 4 to 7 but what does the number actually mean? No matter what number it's displaying it always seems to have the same 5 links under it so I have no idea what that changing number is suppose to be signifying.
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Default Jan 01, 2020 at 04:37 AM
  #4
Hello... my name is James. I'm the system host. Though I guess I haven't been much of a host lately. Been having stress nightmares but I think I'm OK now... Made it out just in time for new year ESPLOSIONS! I'm glad I didn't miss the esplosions... I think it could be triggering for some people so that's why I'm purposely saying it weird and not using the actual word. I can spell it I'm just trying to say it in a funny non-triggering way.

That's probably the first thing you should know about me is I have a weird sense of humor and it helps me not to think about other things. I use to work in theater and I have a YouTube channel which I rarely post on because of dissociation and depression making it really hard to film and upload videos. I would like to be able to upload more regularly because it's freaking impossible to build an audience when I can only post maybe once or twice a year.


Another reason I can rarely ever film anything is because I'm always at my ex-girlfriend's house.


Not sure if I should be looking for couples therapy because technically we're not a couple anymore and never will be again. But it is in the best interest of the child that we maintain some form of civil relationship... that's the only reason I put up with her. But I need her to give me some personal space and show some respect. I need her to actually ASK me when I can babysit instead of TELLING me and holding me emotionally hostage. And most importantly I need her to stop over sharing triggering information. She won't listen to me so maybe if a licensed therapist tells her to do the things I've already asked her to do a million times she might actually listen.

Just to be clear, the child is safe. The one thing we both still agree on is that we want to do what's best for him. We always remain civil in front of him so there's no reason to be concerned about that. The issue is just between us in the way she over shares triggering information and in a way kinda treats me like a slave rather than an equal. I have talked to her about this before but nothing has changed... other than Elen splitting off and being the one who mostly deals with her nonsense cause I can't anymore.

In case anyone is confused... DID only forms from childhood trauma. However when you already have DID new alters can split off at any age due to trauma or stress. So Elen forming as an adult just because I'm having relationship issues doesn't make her any less valid than any other alter who formed in childhood.
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Default Jan 01, 2020 at 11:42 AM
  #5
Quote:
Originally Posted by Universal System View Post
Hello, my name is Elen. I'm the co-host of a system with Dissociative Identity Disorder. Don't worry about us revealing any names here as no one would ever be able to identify us in real life by that. Only two alters actually identify with the legal name of the body and they're both currently dormant anyway.

I only split off a few months ago due to stress from James' (James being the System host) ex-girlfriend which has been a consistent problem ever since they broke up about 5-6 years ago. (Please do not leave suggestions about what he should do without knowing the full story.)

I was going to share more but that might be triggering and it's really not my story to tell. I'm just letting you essentially what my job is... mostly just to handle interactions with the ex-girlfriend.

That said... I fronted for the time when she wasn't around about three days ago. James has been having stress dreams/nightmares and as co-host I just sort of took over I guess. We've been discussing going back to therapy for a while but there's a couple issues.

We have no job, no money, no insurance. Even when we had a job, James was working BELOW the minimum wage for a theater company. (Stage, not a Cinema) It also seems that local therapists are not even aware of what Dissociative Identity Disorder is. One of our neighbors even mentioned having recently finished all her therapy courses in college and they were still referring to it as Multiple Personality Disorder. From what we've learned online it hasn't been called that since the 90's but yet that's also what our therapist called it when we were first diagnosed in 2003.

Since I'm fronting and have some privacy to do so I've decided to take the intuitive and try to find some form of free therapy options online. I've run into some issues there as well. The best option I could find was this forum.

Even here there are some things that seem concerning to me.

1. The sign up process was very singular focuses. What's your gender for example. How am I suppose to answer that? We don't all share the same gender. I'm a woman in a man's body but not exactly trans either because I share a body with mostly male alters. Sexual orientation. Again kind of a confusing question when the options are straight, gay, or bi and you have 40 people in your head. We're all attracted to women but some of us are women so it really depends on who you ask.

Then there's the question are you here for yourself or someone else... How was I suppose to answer that? I'm here for someone else but that someone else happens to live in the same body as me.

2. You have Dissociative Identity Disorder abbreviated to MPD. Which I get it, it use to be known as Multiple Personality Disorder, that's still how most people know it by, but it's DID now and I'm not sure how welcoming you're going to be to a DID system when I'm already kinda put off just setting up an account that wants to treat us as a singular individual.

That might just be limitations in the system or something so I figure, it's at least worth a try. I'll introduce myself and if things go well maybe the others will follow and start posting on this account as well.

Anyway... if anyone is a therapist or can recommend a good therapist... Preferences in no specific order...

DID Specialist (Duh)


Non-religious (Most of us are Atheist though there are a few religious alters we'd really prefer someone who is Atheist or at the very least is not going to bring up their personal beliefs unprovoked.)


Female (There are certain subjects we'd feel more comfortable discussing with a woman.)

Free (Again, we have no way to pay for anything.)

Online (Since therapists in my general area seem uneducated or out of date on my specific issues and our personal situation makes it difficult to meet in person anyway this really seems to be the best option for us.)
welcome....

for answers to your administrative questions.... (the sign up process) you will need to pm a moderator or administrator. per rules of the site administrative issues are not discussed on the public forums. Im guessing this is to keep the forums in order and less discussions on people fighting over the rules.

here is where you will find the rules / guidelines of the site Community Guidelines

one of the rules/ guidelines for what not to do says....

"Soliciting others to join another online community"

Also if you look at the bottom of the page you will see the sites disclaimer that says
"The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice,
diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider. .
Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here. "

based on these I can tell you that no one here is supposed to or can give you recommendations for other forums nor can you get your therapy needs met here.

for therapy contact your medical doctor (the doctor that treats your colds/ flus and other medical issues) they will be able to help you get set up with a mental health treatment provider. if here in the USA its the law to have health insurance that will cover the costs of medical, mental and dental health care needs. if you cant afford health insurance you can contact your locations social services / welfare agency who can help you apply for Medicaid or medicare (free state health insurance for those that meet the lack of money criteria)

for other sites you will need to rely on your abilities to google search just like you did to find psych central. then visit those sites to see which places fit what you are looking for in a mental health website forum.
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Default Jan 01, 2020 at 11:52 AM
  #6
Quote:
Originally Posted by Universal System View Post
Hello, my name is Elen. I'm the co-host of a system with Dissociative Identity Disorder. Don't worry about us revealing any names here as no one would ever be able to identify us in real life by that. Only two alters actually identify with the legal name of the body and they're both currently dormant anyway.

I only split off a few months ago due to stress from James' (James being the System host) ex-girlfriend which has been a consistent problem ever since they broke up about 5-6 years ago. (Please do not leave suggestions about what he should do without knowing the full story.)

I was going to share more but that might be triggering and it's really not my story to tell. I'm just letting you essentially what my job is... mostly just to handle interactions with the ex-girlfriend.

That said... I fronted for the time when she wasn't around about three days ago. James has been having stress dreams/nightmares and as co-host I just sort of took over I guess. We've been discussing going back to therapy for a while but there's a couple issues.

We have no job, no money, no insurance. Even when we had a job, James was working BELOW the minimum wage for a theater company. (Stage, not a Cinema) It also seems that local therapists are not even aware of what Dissociative Identity Disorder is. One of our neighbors even mentioned having recently finished all her therapy courses in college and they were still referring to it as Multiple Personality Disorder. From what we've learned online it hasn't been called that since the 90's but yet that's also what our therapist called it when we were first diagnosed in 2003.

Since I'm fronting and have some privacy to do so I've decided to take the intuitive and try to find some form of free therapy options online. I've run into some issues there as well. The best option I could find was this forum.

Even here there are some things that seem concerning to me.

1. The sign up process was very singular focuses. What's your gender for example. How am I suppose to answer that? We don't all share the same gender. I'm a woman in a man's body but not exactly trans either because I share a body with mostly male alters. Sexual orientation. Again kind of a confusing question when the options are straight, gay, or bi and you have 40 people in your head. We're all attracted to women but some of us are women so it really depends on who you ask.

Then there's the question are you here for yourself or someone else... How was I suppose to answer that? I'm here for someone else but that someone else happens to live in the same body as me.

2. You have Dissociative Identity Disorder abbreviated to MPD. Which I get it, it use to be known as Multiple Personality Disorder, that's still how most people know it by, but it's DID now and I'm not sure how welcoming you're going to be to a DID system when I'm already kinda put off just setting up an account that wants to treat us as a singular individual.

That might just be limitations in the system or something so I figure, it's at least worth a try. I'll introduce myself and if things go well maybe the others will follow and start posting on this account as well.

Anyway... if anyone is a therapist or can recommend a good therapist... Preferences in no specific order...

DID Specialist (Duh)


Non-religious (Most of us are Atheist though there are a few religious alters we'd really prefer someone who is Atheist or at the very least is not going to bring up their personal beliefs unprovoked.)


Female (There are certain subjects we'd feel more comfortable discussing with a woman.)

Free (Again, we have no way to pay for anything.)

Online (Since therapists in my general area seem uneducated or out of date on my specific issues and our personal situation makes it difficult to meet in person anyway this really seems to be the best option for us.)
as for your therapist using outdated diagnostics.. if you feel a treatment provider is doing something that is breaking the law and ethics like using outdated diagnostics and outdated disorder names you can report them to your states board of clinical social workers. this is a panel of people that make sure therapists follow the laws and ethics for the USA and the state that they are practicing therapy and diagnosing in. the rules and ethics are there to protect people that need therapy and diagnosing. so that therapists cant hurt them using outdated things. if your therapist is using outdated names and treatments its best to report them so that they cant hurt anyone like this again. the state board will make sure that they follow the laws, rules and ethics and use the right set of diagnostics, names and so on that they are supposed to be using now.
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Angry Jan 02, 2020 at 01:00 AM
  #7
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Originally Posted by amandalouise View Post
"Soliciting others to join another online community"

Wasn't asking for that.

Quote:
Always consult your mental health professional
Yeah, we don't have one, that's what we were asking for help to find.

Quote:
based on these I can tell you that no one here is supposed to or can give you recommendations for other forums nor can you get your therapy needs met here.
Again, not at all what Elen was asking for. We don't want another forum, we're not trying to get therapy here. We just need to know a good source where we CAN get free therapy online.

This is a really unhelpful post. You've just presented me with a catch 22 in which I need to consult with my therapist which I don't have in order to find a therapist to consult with. If I already had a therapist to consult with I wouldn't be looking for one in the first place.

Quote:
if here in the USA its the law to have health insurance that will cover the costs of medical, mental and dental health care needs.

Not really true by the way. Most health insurance providers have limited or no coverage at all for mental health care. Everything else yeah, but mental health... nope. I've looked into it, there's simply no way to get therapy without paying out of pocket. I literally just looked at the health care plan the law you mentioned provided me with and no where does their web site say anything about mental health or therapy. So I essentially have no insurance that will cover this.

We'll continue to look else where but please do not respond unless you actually intend to provide any helpful information.

Last edited by Universal System; Jan 02, 2020 at 01:29 AM..
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Unhappy Jan 02, 2020 at 02:08 AM
  #8
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Originally Posted by amandalouise View Post
as for your therapist using outdated diagnostics.. if you feel a treatment provider is doing something that is breaking the law and ethics like using outdated diagnostics and outdated disorder names you can report them to your states board of clinical social workers. this is a panel of people that make sure therapists follow the laws and ethics for the USA and the state that they are practicing therapy and diagnosing in. the rules and ethics are there to protect people that need therapy and diagnosing. so that therapists cant hurt them using outdated things. if your therapist is using outdated names and treatments its best to report them so that they cant hurt anyone like this again. the state board will make sure that they follow the laws, rules and ethics and use the right set of diagnostics, names and so on that they are supposed to be using now.

It's not just my old therapist though. The local community collage is still teaching practices that are about 20-30 years out of date. No on who graduated from that program is up to date on what DID is. The law seems to be part of the problem as well because other systems across the U.S. are having similar issues. There are very few specialists out there who actually know what they're doing and most of them aren't even in this country.


Trying to find help when you feel alone and helpless in a completely hopeless situation is overwhelming. That's why we came here. Not as a substitute for therapy but as a source of information... We just need help in finding a therapist...

I might have 40 people in my head but that doesn't mean I can do this by myself. I'm just one body. I'm obviously already under a lot of stress. Trying to find profession help shouldn't be another thing causing stress.
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Default Jan 02, 2020 at 05:33 AM
  #9
Hi universal system. Welcome. Good on you for seeking support. I know how hard it can be to find a therapist who takes this stuff seriously. I recently read a post about DID on a forum for therapists, and it was so disheartening to see that so many of them outright disbelieve in the diagnosis. Therapists actually actively disbelieve in it and think those who "think" they have it actually have personality disorders or are just... lying? I know you know this already. The disinformation, cynicism and disbelief amongst those who are supposed to be helpers boggles my mind.
This forum is really quiet now. Some people still pop in from time to time. Please don't take it personally.
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Default Jan 02, 2020 at 03:16 PM
  #10
Hello universal system.

I wish you luck finding the help you are seeking.It's rough when you can't afford therapy but want to go.
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Default Jan 03, 2020 at 05:34 PM
  #11
Welcome. Know some say MPD cuz that was name when they were dxed or professional learned about it. They always get it right on insurance papers!

Some of ours say *we* didn't DID anything! Others DID it to us.

Other questions about body. Aimed at everybody in all problem fields. Not every member DID only in this section.

Glad you are here. Hope you post often.
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Default Jan 04, 2020 at 02:03 PM
  #12
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Some of ours say *we* didn't DID anything! Others DID it to us.

That is sad and funny... It's sad because of what it actually takes to form this disorder in the first place.

But I like clever word play like that so it's still kinda funny.

That said careful who you say stuff like that too cause some of my head mates aren't likely that at all.

Quote:
Glad you are here. Hope you post often.

That won't really be possible. I wish it were... that's part of the reason I'm seeking therapy.
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Default Jan 06, 2020 at 05:43 PM
  #13
Hello, my name is Arnold. Don't really know what else I'm suppose to say on here... My inner world self is an amputee (I'm missing my right arm) I have a bionic implant in place of that missing limb. Out here in the real world the body actually has all it's limbs so I have this weird kinda reverse phantom limb thing going on.
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Default Jan 07, 2020 at 04:55 AM
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Discussing Dissociation | Thoughts from a DID Systems Specialist to learn more about DID and peer support, might be helpful


I follow this blog

it is indeed very helpful
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Default Jan 07, 2020 at 04:56 AM
  #15
welcome universal system.

good to meet all of you
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Default Jan 07, 2020 at 06:27 PM
  #16
Not sure if you are in the US or not.....where I live (CA) there are community mental health centers and while not free, people I know who have gone there have paid like $10 a year. It's for people who don't have insurance. I can't say about the quality of such centers, might not have someone who specializes in DID, it might be a resource worth exploring. Not every community has one. The closest to me is probably 40 minutes away. Not sure if that would be a deterrent to you. Hope you are able to find what you are looking for. I don't have DID btw, just thought I would answer this post because you were seeming to ask for help in locating a therapist. Wish you the best, hugs, Kit

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Default Jan 07, 2020 at 10:39 PM
  #17
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Not sure if you are in the US or not.....where I live (CA) there are community mental health centers and while not free, people I know who have gone there have paid like $10 a year. It's for people who don't have insurance. I can't say about the quality of such centers, might not have someone who specializes in DID, it might be a resource worth exploring. Not every community has one. The closest to me is probably 40 minutes away. Not sure if that would be a deterrent to you. Hope you are able to find what you are looking for. I don't have DID btw, just thought I would answer this post because you were seeming to ask for help in locating a therapist. Wish you the best, hugs, Kit

Hello SlumberKitty. I is a sleepy meow meows too... My name Cheetah, me run vary fast inner world but out here the body is very sleepy and I don't get to do much other than sleeps. I go do that nows. Night night.
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Default Dec 21, 2020 at 02:48 AM
  #18
I just noticed this forum was book marked on our computer so I thought I'd look around. I guess we haven't been very active since Elen first started this account. So just to update you still haven't found a therapist... not really much of an update but yeah... We're still looking.

-Acula
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Default Dec 21, 2020 at 02:55 AM
  #19
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That is sad and funny... It's sad because of what it actually takes to form this disorder in the first place.

But I like clever word play like that so it's still kinda funny.

That said careful who you say stuff like that too cause some of my head mates aren't likely that at all.



That won't really be possible. I wish it were... that's part of the reason I'm seeking therapy.

Hey wait a minute... Which one of us posted this? There's names on most of the other posts... or at least I can tell who it is but what they posted... but I have no clue who wrote this one.

-Acula
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