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Breaking Dawn
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Default May 22, 2021 at 06:12 PM
  #321
I hear you, @Alive99! I believe mindfulness is wonderful when that's the best way to go. Then there are times that seem to need another trick, so to speak. One of my effective helpers is visualizing the future I want. Some days are just too hard, though. So I have to keep trying until I get back on track again.

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Default May 22, 2021 at 06:16 PM
  #322
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Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn View Post
I hear you, @Alive99! I believe mindfulness is wonderful when that's the best way to go. Then there are times that seem to need another trick, so to speak. One of my effective helpers is visualizing the future I want. Some days are just too hard, though. So I have to keep trying until I get back on track again.

How do you use mindfulness for it?

I can't visualise the future because for some of it the concrete steps are not clear to me, so I cannot really believe in that future so it does not motivate me enough. If I can see the concrete steps clearly then I can visualise and believe and be motivated.

What do you do with the days when you just are off track anyway? Like if you made some promise or commitment to do x thing and you couldn't do it?
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Default May 22, 2021 at 06:48 PM
  #323
Hi again, @Alive99. For the mindfulness, first of all, I've been a meditater for a long time. Plus I think about the details that I'm dealing with & I ask myself, what can I do right now to help myself in this situation. Then about visualizing, it's easy for me because I'm very spiritual. And I believe my neurons & my whole body knows what I'm feeling, and our universal intelligent spirit (God) will communicate with all of us what we need to know.

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Default May 22, 2021 at 06:56 PM
  #324
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Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn View Post
Hi again, @Alive99. For the mindfulness, first of all, I've been a meditater for a long time. Plus I think about the details that I'm dealing with & I ask myself, what can I do right now to help myself in this situation. Then about visualizing, it's easy for me because I'm very spiritual. And I believe my neurons & my whole body knows what I'm feeling, and our universal intelligent spirit (God) will communicate with all of us what we need to know.

Ah I see. All that sounds great. With my dissociation, I don't have access to the details or feelings like that unfortunately.
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Default May 24, 2021 at 09:06 AM
  #325
Glad therapy's today. I'm panicking about a lot of things. I feel Cayla getting closer lately. I don't want to disappear this time. Too many things to do.
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Default May 24, 2021 at 09:27 AM
  #326
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Glad therapy's today. I'm panicking about a lot of things. I feel Cayla getting closer lately. I don't want to disappear this time. Too many things to do.
Good luck, @stahrgeyzer!

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Default May 28, 2021 at 01:33 AM
  #327
I feel like it is my fault. I did this to myself.
My problems overwhelm others and it scares people.
I feel like maybe it is better of without me. I try so hard but I can't seem to succeed.
Everything is falling apart.
I am in a ward because I forgot too much. But everything is dream-like, I am scared.
I am too much. I am wrong.
I just want to be with God so badly right now.
Or go home.
But I know I can't...
I am scared of things repeating themselves.
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Default May 28, 2021 at 10:39 PM
  #328
Feeling better with just occasional moments of dissociation where I find myself standing in the room zoned out. The parts are being nice. I've been thinking about integration & if it's possible.
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Default Jun 01, 2021 at 10:10 PM
  #329
An especially stressful day today. While driving I kept zoning out. And when I'd snap out of it it took 3 or 4 seconds to realize where I was and what I was doing.

Thank goodness for therapy!
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Default Jun 03, 2021 at 10:29 PM
  #330
I have an appointment with a t at the end of the month. I have been struggling with thoughts of leaving but I know not now. The t is going to evaluate me. This will be the first time I will be meeting her. She does not take my insurance so that will limit how often I see her. But I don't want to deal with myself alone. I am getting tired.
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Default Jun 03, 2021 at 10:37 PM
  #331
I recently started flipping through tictok. I realized it is similar to watching TV. My brain goes to sleep. It calms my thoughts an anxiety. There is a lot of crap on tictok but I scroll past the **** and view the things I like. Its interesting I recently realized how voyeuristic it is. This makes me want to delete the app but I still need to shut down my brain to get through the day. I hope therapy works for me. I don't want to keep scrolling through tictok.
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Default Jun 05, 2021 at 04:13 AM
  #332
I think I am not making it up, maybe it is real. I am really doing okay... <3
And I am getting help and accepting it...
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Default Jun 05, 2021 at 10:13 AM
  #333
I need a good therapist & some good medicine.

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Default Jun 08, 2021 at 08:17 AM
  #334
I woke up feeling like a completely different person. In some ways I feel a lot better and in other ways worse. Maybe integration? Hopefully
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Default Jun 08, 2021 at 01:03 PM
  #335
Never mind. It faded, so I'm back to normal me. I was hoping for some kind of integration. Maybe temporary integration is a thing.
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Default Jun 10, 2021 at 07:06 AM
  #336
I have been feeling so depressed. I don't know why that's news, I'm depressed every day

we're making a baby box for the younger alters too. we can't get that doll we wanted, so the next best thing is a box with baby stuff in it

and we're also going to make up a story about a baby getting ready for bed which we need to work on

I am not sure how a baby box is going to lift our mood (not how we've been feeling), but hey: comforting items and such
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Question Jun 10, 2021 at 08:57 AM
  #337
Trouble.

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Default Jun 11, 2021 at 02:44 PM
  #338
I had a dissociative episode in a shop, I was so embarrassed. I try to process it but I just can't.
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Default Jun 13, 2021 at 08:43 AM
  #339
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I had a dissociative episode in a shop, I was so embarrassed. I try to process it but I just can't.


I've been their.

can't remember what I was buying, but I remember it was halloween. probably food or something
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Default Jun 13, 2021 at 08:45 AM
  #340
I am not having much luck with my baby book- I'm really not creative. all I know about it so far is that I want the story in the style of dr seus, and I want the baby to be called stephanie as I like that name

oh well: I'll probbaly ask someone to do it for me. no kidding.. lol.... I am so impatient with myself- not just at this, but at everything
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