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Member
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: Northeast
Posts: 315
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#1
I have always had difficulty thinking of my body or of having a body, which seemed gross. I actually feel really cringy and uncomfortable with the word. Growing up I remember learning that others seemed to naturally employ this concept of body. It seemed so weird and kinda gross they were all okay with that, and with the word, but I mostly avoided thinking about it. I was able to think about parts of myself at a time but they didn’t really exist in relationship or connection to other parts. Sometimes I felt connected to the parts but sometimes I would think, “these hands are doing what you asked” or “these feet are bringing me somewhere” (I often looked at my feet while walking). I once said to my MD, when he pressed me on it, “these hands will not hurt this body!” I was so mad at the time. I am dissociative sometimes. I fog out, float, disappear, feel disconnected and/or feel pretty drugged out without taking anything. I do not have alters. But for some reason thinking about other peoples’ young child alters makes me feel really sick and fuzzy. It’s actually getting hard to write now. I just wondered if others with dissociative disorders feel this way. I’ve literally never asked anyone about it.
__________________ “I wanted to ask her how the same thing could be so ugly and so glorious, and its words and stories so damning and brilliant...I AM HAUNTED BY HUMANS.” —The Book Thief |
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Breaking Dawn, mote.of.soul, RoxanneToto, Yaowen
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Breaking Dawn
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Member Since Sep 2019
Location: USA
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#2
Hi, wordshaker, I also dissociate & I don't think I have alters, but I have many voices plus various sounds & noises (airplanes, musical instruments, garbage truck, etc.). About the body, I think of it as an ecosystem of many systems. I feel love & gratitude for all the body parts. Unfortunately, the voices, at least the main ones, say they don't feel that way & that they don't care about the body. I could say more.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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RoxanneToto, wordshaker
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RoxanneToto, wordshaker
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Member
Member Since Jan 2022
Location: Nowhere
Posts: 41
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#3
I have DID and have always felt the same way.
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Breaking Dawn, wordshaker
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wordshaker
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Member
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: Northeast
Posts: 315
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#4
@Breaking Dawn @Jesla
Kind thanks for your helpful thoughts. 🙏🌈💛 I have a lot to learn. Just noticing and seeing my weird ways as actual symptoms is new to me. __________________ “I wanted to ask her how the same thing could be so ugly and so glorious, and its words and stories so damning and brilliant...I AM HAUNTED BY HUMANS.” —The Book Thief |
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Breaking Dawn
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New Member
Member Since Apr 2022
Location: Fort Collins, CO
Posts: 2
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#5
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Breaking Dawn
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Breaking Dawn, Quietmind 2
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