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Rainestorme
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Member Since: Aug 2022
Location: USA
Posts: 9
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#1
Hi, this is only my second post. I have Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified 1B. From what I've gathered that means I basically have DID but without the amnesia. I feel crazy and it would really help to meet others with alters/parts.
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Breaking Dawn
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#2
Thank you for posting here, @Rainestorme. I will be glad to read more of your posts.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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#3
Welcome!
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lemonSys
[ old stuff is different and new now ]
Member Since: Nov 2022
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#4
Hello @Rainestorme —
I, too, am new here. Though I am not new to the experience of dissociation itself, it has been manifesting in more pronounced or “severe” and kinda different ways as of late which has me feeling like I’m experiencing all this as a “newbie” again. So, we can feel crazy together. About 25ish years ago I was diagnosed as DDNOS. At that time, there were no subtypes. I didn’t do much research on dissociation or dissociative disorders until very recently. So, although I have had this dx (diagnosis) for quite some time, I am just now learning the jargon/terms/technicalities/nuances/differences/etc of all this stuff. As I understand it, DDNOS - dissociative disorder not otherwise specified - has been changed/“reworded” to OSDD - otherwise specified dissociative disorder. In addition, there are 4 (I think) subtypes. As for the “1b” designation, your understanding is the same as mine - DID without amnesia between parts. - according to the DSM etc. TBH, though, I’m not sure why there are separate dx’s for OSDD and DID as opposed to one dx of something like DSD - dissociative spectrum disorder. Just as autism runs on a spectrum - with not all the folks sharing the same symptoms/characteristics/experiences, or when they do they may be to different degrees of severity/interference - dissociative experiences, as well, seem to run on a spectrum. I mean that’s even how most explanations start, right? Something like “Everyone dissociates - day dreaming is a type of dissociation; driving home on “autopilot” is a type of dissociation - but when it is “more than that” it could be a dissociative disorder.”. So, to me, something like OSDD (any subtype) is just at a “less severe” (horrible description as it sounds like I’m minimizing OSDD which I absolutely am not) point on the dissociative spectrum than DID. [Sorry to rant - just a personal “pet peeve” (or something) of mine, I guess..] As far as wanting to meet others with alters/parts, allow me to introduce myself: I am lemonSys. Including me, I have 7 parts that I am aware of. The youngest is 4, the oldest is ? (not exactly sure how old he is, tbh). I, lemonSys am female, but do have parts that identify as male. One part - not sure if it is technically a part - is a flying, non-human, drone type thing (it’s called “the watcher” and does just what the name suggests, with a 360 view at all times). So, these are the parts I know about. Reading this, to me at least, makes me think “Umm what? Yeah, that’s not crazy (said sarcastically)”. My Tdoc (therapist) repeatedly assures me that it is not crazy. That it, in fact, is the opposite - it makes complete sense as a coping mechanism and survival technique resulting from all the “stuff” I have been through. Well, that’s all well and good, and true, but it doesn’t do a damn thing to make me feel less crazy. And this is my response/understanding when I’m able to think relatively rationally. Try telling all this “reasoning” to a hysterical 4-year-old, or a teen that just wants to die…. “Crazy” is supposedly a derogatory term, but seriously, how the hell else can you convey these feelings - physical and mental? The closest I have come is considered even “less acceptable”: a giant mind *****. Anyhow, nice to meet you. Share or not share whatever you like about you/you all. Look forward to reading you later. — lemonSys __________________ “The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven.” — John Milton, Paradise Lost |
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