[TryToBeBetter]

Well actually I found this forum (which lead me to do some reading).

Some weird things about this...

1) I have known for a long time there have been periods in my life where I am not there. I have in the past described it like I am on the outside watching things happen but not being in control. Later I struggle to remember what happened.

2) I thought this was normal. Even when it came up in counselling I didn't think much of it. My counselor said I was disassociating but I just thought that's what everyone does in stressful/traumatic situations.

But having done a little reading around it I have some questions.

Does everyone do it to some degree or is that not the case?

How the hell can you stop it when it is happening? Honestly the lose of control (feeling of control?) terrifies me. It doesn't feel safe.

I will actually talk to my counsellor about it when I next see her, but thought maybe people here might help me get an initial handle on this.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by TryToBeBetter

Well actually I found this forum (which lead me to do some reading).

Some weird things about this...

1) I have known for a long time there have been periods in my life where I am not there. I have in the past described it like I am on the outside watching things happen but not being in control. Later I struggle to remember what happened.

2) I thought this was normal. Even when it came up in counselling I didn't think much of it. My counselor said I was disassociating but I just thought that's what everyone does in stressful/traumatic situations.

But having done a little reading around it I have some questions.

Does everyone do it to some degree or is that not the case?

How the hell can you stop it when it is happening? Honestly the lose of control (feeling of control?) terrifies me. It doesn't feel safe.

I will actually talk to my counsellor about it when I next see her, but thought maybe people here might help me get an initial handle on this.

your question

Does everyone do it to some degree or is that not the case?

yes everyone does it. how to stop it thats an individual thing. only you and your treatment provider can decide what is best for you to do to stop disassociating.

a starting point may be getting clarification from your treatment provider. you may want to know whether they meant the word...

disassociate (notice the letter a between two s's and is the word in your post) in general this means to purposely stop doing something, purposely not participating, for some people disengaging is normal and a habit and it feels out of their control.

or

dissociate (notice no letter a between two s's and is not the word you used in your post) which is a normal response to a trigger. this is just like experiencing any other emotion. something happens (trigger)which causes you to feel certain ways. (effect / reaction).

the two words mean two completely different things but can sound alike. both have a normal, mild, to severe levels of severity, so to answer your question yes everyone does it.

how to stop it depends upon which word your counselor used in context of the topics being discussed and all the hows whats wheres whens whys and so forth that are covered by mental health privacy and confidentiality.

When I experience each of these words I use grounding techniques. taking a moment to breath, recognizing which I am doing and why and doing something about the triggers or stressful situations.

Im glad you plan to talk with your treatment provider, they can explain to you what they meant and together you can develop a treatment plan that will help you to be more aware of when you are doing it and how to stop it.