D.I.D. paranoia ?

The more I find out about D.I.D. ...the harder I find it to cope. Whenever a friend is upset about something and they don't want to talk about it...I start to worry that maybe I've said/done something without knowing it and they just don't want to say. Then I end up apologising profusely for the slightest little thing...or apologising without knowing if there's actually anything to apologise for. Friends who know me well understand that. But people who only know me a little bit...they sometimes think I'm clingy, paranoid, a weirdo...and that just makes it worse! I'd never even heard of co-consciousness before coming to pc and that's made things even worse...now I think I'm a weirdo!

Sorry, there's not much point to this post except to get it out.

These words took what my brain couldn't put on paper and said them for me.......Thank you so much cuz I feel that way too!!!, Hugs Nerak

(((((Nerak)))))

Kalamity Jane,

I think it is because being DID you internalize everything you hear or think you hear because I don't know about you but I had to get good at reading body language. At my house you always had to gauge mom's body language in order to know what to say so you did not go flying across the room. And sometimes I think now as an adult it makes us too sensitive for our own good. We do the that everyone we meet will be like the others that hurt us so we put up a shield and try to deflect everything or filter everything but it distorts our perception. Meaning what we see and hear comes across slighted skewed. Like if we don't hear from someone right away, we jump to the conclusion, they don't like us, or we did something, versus oh they are busy or out to town or working late. It is always we did something wrong because that is what happened to us when we were young. We never think that the other person had something going on.

So hopeful with our T's help we can help to think about what the other people have going on that could be going on first before we blame our actions or lack of actions.

I understand where you are coming from, I do this too and I am trying to learn with my t's help to unlearn it but it is soooooo hard.

fragmented

Thank you fragmented. I think it's also because I have no awareness of my alters, makes it hard to know when someone is upset with me but won't tell me what I've done and I genuinely don't know.

Thanks for understanding though and good luck to you with your work on this.