[FrenzyRose]

I am very disappointed with my situation now.. I sometimes want to end this suffering I have now. I am with a man I do not love. Ive been here because my mood that time is to be his woman though I know problem may arise later on because of the cultural differences that we have..But he is too kind and responsible to be hurt of our separation if I choose so..He is 20 years older than I.. Am i that stupid to leave him, or stupid to live with him? This thinking only leads for stress in my part..

I seriously need advices..

[jenkins09]

what are the cultural differences? with a 20 year age difference, do you have much in common? were you looking for him to be your "dad?"

[FrenzyRose]

He is the youngest in their family, and raised so much of disciplined he said by his soldier dad. At present, he's running their business.. He is a foreigner, but decided to moved here for business purposes. i love him, yes. I grew up from a simple family and that I never intend to marry him, they say, "marriage convenience". Honestly, I tried to reached him out, this and that of his culture. Even quitting my job that I really love, just for him to show I can give up my previous lifestyle for him. But he's asking too much that I feel abuse. I cannot go outside myself meeting friends alone in this free country I live now. My actions are numbered. And every time he's angry, he stress out how different my style of living from him. I know you understand what this feeling I have..There's nothing I can complain about his being responsible. But that's not a guarantee of a happy relationship, right? We also teach each other our own culture but his always dominating.No, I mean there are some things we agreed but we don't have much in common..I am sensitive, he is more than I am.Emotional also, to the extend of attempting suicidal act..He said he suffered much his young time and since I am his first love, first true love? huh, I don't know..He can speak English but not that fluent.. However,I understand him though I am feeling of being unworthy to be trusted. Am I that bad wanting our relationship to end? Do I still have to do something to keep this? What's awaiting for us in the near future if we stay? Oh. This is really really tough..

[Leed]

I think that you've already decided that you do NOT want to stay with him. You're just afraid of what he might do. Well dearheart, you CANNOT be blamed for anything that he does. We do NOT have the power to make someone do ANYTHING. If he decides to do the unthinkable, it would NOT be your fault!!! You do not have that power. So if you want to leave, LEAVE. if you do not want to spend the rest of your days with this man, leave now!!! I really don't think you want to stay with him, right?? You don't have to -- you are in FREE AMERICA. No one can make you stay. So get out -- and don't worry about anything that he does. Nothing will be your fault.

I wish you the very best. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee

[FrenzyRose]

Thank you Leed, by now I am earning confidence to leave.. I want no more regrets or whatever, because at some point of our relationship he had been kind. And really, I am feeling guilty sometimes.. But oh, I am too young to settle myself for this kind of relationship which is no more working. Thanks a lot..

[Corus]

I second what Leeds said, I think you have made up your mind its no amount the courage you can gain to tell and move on, I decided to tell my boyfriend that I no long loved him after about 6 months of general unhappiness and arguments etc... it then took three months for us to split up and find new places to live, its a long process Frenzyrose.
good luck
Corus

[winyan]

Originally Posted by FrenzyRose

I am very disappointed with my situation now.. I sometimes want to end this suffering I have now. I am with a man I do not love. Ive been here because my mood that time is to be his woman though I know problem may arise later on because of the cultural differences that we have..But he is too kind and responsible to be hurt of our separation if I choose so..He is 20 years older than I.. Am i that stupid to leave him, or stupid to live with him? This thinking only leads for stress in my part..

I seriously need advices..

Wow I find myself in a similar place I married my husband 17 years ago even though I did not love him long story short neither of us is happy but he still wants to be in the marriage and I do not I had what I call an awakening in late fall of 2010 I woke up one day and realized what is missing in my life is love and passion how does a person 55 years old realize suddenly what’s is missing how does that happen Leonard does have some problems but we all do fundamentally he is a good person but because of a bad decision I made 17 years ago we are separated now so if you find answers please let me know am I being monumentally selfish?