[hellofriends]

Hi there...

Around one year ago, my parents announced their divorce - my dad's wish. Honestly, it didn't hit too hard, because I had seen it coming. I'm 23 and not living with them, and have a sister (18) who lives at them. They were married for like 25 years.

The thing is, I feel as if my dad is moving insanely fast with his new girlfriend. My mom has a boyfriend aswell, but she's still affected by the divorce. They found their GF/bf like 3-4 months apart.

Me and my sister have met my dad's girlfriend and her four kids on several occasions, and we even went on a vacation with them. This was only like six months after they met. They're planning on moving in together.

Today I was at my dad's parents house for 2nd Christmas, where his girlfriend was. When my sister and I came home to my mom's, she asked who was at my grandparents', and I didn't want to lie, so I told her the GF was there.

She became sad. I realized how fast my dad is moving. How will my mom react to the moving in? My dad is really bad at emotional stuff, he just can't. He tries, but it becomes vague and annoying to a degree. My mom was told about his GF the day before the vacation, ON MY REQUEST, because I couldn't stand having to lie to my mom. This is such a mess.

Maybe I just need to rant, but when she finds out that her daughter is going to live with my dad's girlfriend and her kids, I fear for her reaction, because I know she will just get an e-mail from my dad about it. That's how he told her about the gf. She's still coping with it, while he has had 5-6 years of thinking while in the marriage, and my mom has only had 1 year to get used to this.. And what about my sister? God, I love her so dearly, and I can see that she's suffering when my mom asked who was there. She knows they're moving in together, but.. It's not her responsibility to tell that, but she doesn't want to lie.

I just wish my dad would slow the **** down, and be a little considerate! Should I tell him this? I just want my mom and dad to communicate, but I hear completely different things from both of them! ********, I feel like I'm a psychiatrist.. This isn't my responsibility, is it?!

Why does my mom tell me that she wants time to calm down, but at the same time she's bothered with taking care of an entire house alone! Just let my dad sell the house, find an apartment and get out of each others lives already! Why does it have to be such an extended thing?!!??? My sister and I are adults, we talk, we can handle it, if the footwork is done properly!

Sorry for the swearing, but I'm getting a little furious. I shouldn't have to worry, and neither does my sister. Did anyone experience something alike, and would like to share thoughts or experiences?

If you managed to get through that wall of text, thanks for at least reading it.. And thanks for any replies.

(It's late and I've been rambling, so it might not make sense, and the English might be terrible - it's not my native :P)

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[oldlife_disrupted]

He is going really fast but that might just be him being unable to grieve the dead relationship. Your mother sounds like she shouldn't be dating yet if she's still having a hard time processing this.