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#1
Jul 25, 2014, 01:55 AM
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I'm over my husbands crap. He's been away at work for the last six months. It was nice and peaceful.
Now he's back and brings drama. He's got ongoing issues from the ex wife still talking about me (they separated 19 years ago), and now some woman is saying he raped her 24 years ago. And now I'm triggered because he brought up my past experience, saying I had friend with my friend's boyfriend when he actually raped me and I reported it. It happened in 1998 and took me a long time to get past it. We've got three young children so I'm only with him for the kids. I love him but not the hurt. I don't trust him. I think I'm done. |
 anon20141119, eskielover, Mike_J, waiting4
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#2
Jul 25, 2014, 01:14 PM
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Quote:
I wish you well. |
 iheartjacques
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#3
Jul 26, 2014, 06:52 AM
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It's a decision I've been avoiding for a long time.
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#4
Jul 29, 2014, 12:32 PM
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Sometimes I think we wait until things really get bad so that we finally know exactly what we need to do......or we feel trapped & can't figure a way to get out.
__________________
 Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this. Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018 |
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#5
Jul 31, 2014, 06:53 AM
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T is trying to see if I change the way I think of my husband - dramatically lower my expectations - if I can tolerate it a little longer for the kids.
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| eskielover, ogyogm
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#6
Jul 31, 2014, 06:59 PM
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That only seems to work if one's expectations are out of line in the first place....there are just certain things that need to be part of our expectations in our marriage & we shouldn't lower or change them....but if those expectations are something that no person could ever adhere to in the first place...then it would be appropriate to change.
If I hadn't had my engineering career for all those years to hide away in, I never would have been able to tolerate the things my H was doing. I don't think that staying together for the kids is very good because the dysfunctional families that we cause by living that way ends up hurting the kids just as bad if not worse than leaving & ending the marriage. However, maybe marriage counseling together might be a good benefit....sounds like there are issues there just with ways of communication & not being thoughtful in that communication......so marriage counseling might be a better place to start & might be able to really make a difference.
__________________
Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this. Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018 |
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#7
Aug 01, 2014, 03:19 AM
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Thanks for the replies. He's agreed to counselling. Finally!
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| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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