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Member
Member Since Oct 2016
Location: Western Australia
Posts: 36
7 |
#1
I want to separate but know my husband will never cope for the same reasons I want to leave. He cant cook, doesnt work, cant use a computer, doesnt drive etc. He is an emotional leach and as crazy as it sounds it is his own self choices yet I still feel guilt ridden for wanting to go
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![]() Anonymous55397, CrimsonKing, gayleggg, Unrigged64072835, Yours_Truly
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Apr 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 26,619
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#2
Don't feel guilty. You are not his keeper and shouldn't let his dependency on you keep you from moving on. He'll have to learn to deal with life on his on.
__________________ Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha ![]() |
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#3
I 100% agree with Gayle.
Unless he has a legitimate disability that prevents him from doing these things, he will be able to learn how to do them. |
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Member
Member Since Oct 2016
Location: Western Australia
Posts: 36
7 |
#4
Thanks for replying,
Over night I was unwell with IBS he actually was helpful and ran out finding my meds etc but other times he could just continue and ignore me - I burnt my forearm on cooker few weeks ago. He heard from the family room but didnt bother coming in. Its a bad burn and still getting dressed but hes not acknowledged it once. How do I stop reacting to whatever mood hes in? I am either fired up to go or feeling sorry that he'll never cope |
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Junior Member
Member Since Sep 2016
Location: United States
Posts: 14
7 3 hugs
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#5
Quote:
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Member
Member Since Oct 2016
Location: Western Australia
Posts: 36
7 |
#6
Quote:
I knew he didnt drive but where he lived - central London theres nowhere to park a car so many dont drive. Mobile phones were relatively new when we married 25 years ago. He is sports fantantic so thought he just wasnt into computers and he used to speak about cooking for workmates when he worked nightshift... In hindsight I think hes had an OCD for years but hasnt ever been diagnosed but is routine is so regimented and inflexible he actually wouldnt have time to cook - he says he cant work because he looks after 2 cats. Have to say he doesnt have time because exactly that. He checks on the cats hourly between 7am & midnight. Hes often exhausted from doing mundane chores that he draws out to last hours.. Our lives are so bizarre I cannot begin to explain yet he thinks all is well. He never lives the garden, has not one friend anywhere, never speaks to anyone other than me my four siblings, my parents and his mum. Seriously if I go he will have nobody and nothing other than 2 cats and sports channel |
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#7
These things aren't your responsibility.
Believe me - he will learn. |
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