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MarciaL
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Member Since: Mar 2021
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 2
3 yr Member
Default Mar 17, 2021 at 07:50 AM
  #1
Hi I’m Marcia, 48 years young, divorced and so happy with my new life.
As I experienced myself and what I often read, going through divorce is a tough experience. I was in a relationship of 12 years of which 7 years married. No kids involved, just three little dogs that stole my heart.

When I decided to file for divorce, I was financially dependent and I knew I would go into a rough time. I’m no psychiatrist, nor doctor, but my ex to be resembled a narcissist with almost no empathy. Somebody with loads of money and used to getting what he wants. Because of tax reasons I had to stay in the same house as my ex to be until the first settlement payment. (I live in the Netherlands) He had no intention of leaving the house during this period, so we lived in the same house during the divorce. I needed support just for me. A challenging time ahead so I made a plan to keep me going forward.

During divorce you can feel very lonely and alone. Feelings of hopelessness and despair can be overwhelming. Friends and family are always good to talk to and can be a big support, but I didn’t always want to burden them with my divorce stories. Being a coach myself I chose to get one to help me focus on myself and my future. As she is not emotionally attached, she could see things differently and help me go forward. What do I want and what not, what are my boundaries, most important who do I want to be. It helped me break through useless patterns and circles. With not emotionally attached I don’t mean she didn’t care, because she did and she still does. She just didn’t have the emotional blur I had and could therefore help me see and create more. Having a coach gave me the strength and energy to get through the difficult moments of divorce. With her support and help I built a new future to look at during the rough times. Two pairs of eyes see more than one. Two pairs of brains know more than one. By working together with her I got more ideas, saw more possibilities and had somebody to kick my *** when needed. She helped me look forward and create a new life.

I’m officially divorced for 3 years now, got my own house, am financially and emotionally independent, got new friends, new hobbies. Guess what?! I also still have my coach, I love it! Don’t only need her for bad times, love to work with her also in the good times!

Last edited by CANDC; Mar 18, 2021 at 08:35 AM.. Reason: Make within Community Guidelines
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Rockingham
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Member Since: Mar 2021
Location: Tahoe City
Posts: 3
3 yr Member
Default Apr 05, 2021 at 08:48 PM
  #2
Marcia,

Thanks for posting! I'm only a couple of months in on the divorce road and I really appreciate your positive story.

R
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MarciaL
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Member Since: Mar 2021
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 2
3 yr Member
Default Apr 06, 2021 at 04:18 AM
  #3
Rockingham,

You are very welkom. With my posting I hope to help people. If needed you can get a pocket light to help you get through the darkness back into to the light.

Marcia
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Lifeisgood1
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Member Since: Jul 2021
Location: Ohio
Posts: 2
2 yr Member
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Default Jul 18, 2021 at 09:13 PM
  #4
Hello I’m really impressed with your story, I’m glad you are doing better now and moving forward. I’ve been divorced for 3 years now, my ex was into drugs and cheated several times with her boyfriend. I was so heartbroken, I asked for a divorce and have been single since then. I am doing pretty well!
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