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HBFay08
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Member Since: Mar 2021
Location: Maryland
Posts: 1
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#1
My husband and I have been married for 16 years. He has been distant lately and we have had some issues but nothing that I thought was so bad we were headed for divorce. He came home Friday and told me he was leaving me. I am heart broken. I don't know where to start, what to ask, and how to react. I can't stop crying. I have to go to work this morning and I am hoping I am able to make it through without completely falling apart. I am alone here in this state with no family. I moved here with him for a job. He also came and told me he took a job in another state and will be leaving at the end of the month. Of course there is so much more to our story but I am getting ready to go to work and don't want to start the water works. How do I start this process? I was blindsided and I am terrified of the unknown. I went to the emergency room due to a panic attack on Friday night. He moved out the bedroom into a guest room and refuses to talk to me. He hides in the room. I am so lost. I have an appointment with my therapist on Thursday but in the meantime, I just wanted to talk. My sisters know but they are so angry that they are no help. They want revenge and I don't want to fall into the anger and bitter woman. Any advice would be helpful. Thank you for listening.
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Open Eyes, rechu, unaluna
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Legendary Wise Elder
Open Eyes
Not a Unicorn, just another horse
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,093
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#2
Your husband sounds like he is going through a mid-life crisis. Please understand that often the distancing is the first sign and he isn't running from you as much as what in himself was somehow unhappy and unfulfilled. This can happen in any relationship, but tends to happen when approaching fifty.
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Legendary
MickeyCheeky
My echo is the only voice coming back
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Italy
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#3
So Sorry about what is going on! i agree with the wise and wonderful Open Eyes about this not necessarely being your own fault. Have you tried to suggest couple counseling to him? It is good that you're doing individual therapy as Hopefully it will help you to get through all of this. Please do not give up and feel free to share whatever is on your mind here. You are also right about not letting anger and jealousy destroy you. i Hope and Pray things will turn out well. Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @HBFay08, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!
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