Struggling right now

My wife has threatened to leave me often. She has struggled with mental health and physical health since years. It's been hard, and I hit a stretch of depression for a year too.

I've gotten things wrong. Often. But I've never stopped trying. But it's like each thing, issue, or behavior I make changes to, there's another issue for her to be angry about.

I DO have a fear of being alone. Right now, I think she is making her plan to leave. I always felt she could threaten to leave, but I wouldn't go there. It would've been a lie anyway.

I keep trying because I feel like if I could get it right, things would be perfect.

Last night I broke. I'd tried all day to do and say things to bridge a gap. It worked, until the end of the night, then she took apart all I'd done, and took apart me as a person. I broke... I wrote her a letter last night with specifics about how these behaviors were damaging and had to change. Email because I couldn't get a word in, in person.

I culminated it with, you are it, you are my wife, my partner, you are my end game, but the things you blame me for has to stop. It's not accurate, and is provably not accurate.

I came home from work today to her being gone. She arrived an hour later, and is in our room on the phone right now.

She ignored three calls and 3 texts during the day. She's really

The stuff I said was true. No cussing, no name calling, no threats. I've re read it a ton today. And I want to retract it all for the sake of peace.

Just looking for some inner peace right now.

RDM

Do you think she is emotionally abusive? What is her mental illness if you don’t mind my asking?

Anxiety since years. Depression, especially with chronic health issues that emerged and kept her from progressing professionally, and later fully held her back from life.

I'm home almost all the time. I have no outside burdens other than work, and that is often done at home.

There isn't an amount that i can be around, or do, that is enough. And everyone is ticked at me; not enough time with my wife, not enough time with our kids, not enough time spent on work, not seeing friends enough, not enough work on the house, not enough family time, not enough one on one time.... Well, SOMEONE must be getting my time, because I certainly have none.

When I said enough, quit finding fault, what you need isnt possible, I'm here everyday and I spent the last two days trying to connect with you and making the kids wait their turn..... Silence.

24 hours later, she needs the car because has "meetings" scheduled, and is changing her phone plan. No more family plan. She doesn't want me to see her call records or bills. Her words to me.

RDM