Divorce or Not

I just joined this group and I'd appreciate your thoughts. Thank you in advance.

About my wife and I--We have been married almost 13 years and together 16 years. I'm 45, she's 39. We both have our Masters Degrees and good careers. We also have two sons that are 6 and 9 years old. I have general anxiety and take zoloft for it which keeps it in check. My wife has ADHD and takes meds as needed.

My wife and I are currently experiencing a very difficult time in our marriage. My wife recently has stated she wants to divorce and sell our brand new house that we built two years ago.

I don't want to divorce or sell our house. I'm always in favor of repairing relationships, which like everything in life has highs and lows. Over the years we have been together she has said she wants a divorce multiple times, yet we continue our relationship and seemingly get through things ok to the point that we still take family trips, spend time with our families move to new houses, etc. Because of this I arrived at the mindset that her mentioning divorce is an idle threat, something she has used when stressed or when we are arguing.

This time, it seems to be real--but, then again I'm never for sure, which isn't good for my mental health to be so unsure of where we stand in our marriage.

She also cheated on me about two years into our marriage and I found out. She had been having an affair for 3 months and I saw text messages. We got through that and continued to move to new houses and had our second child.

I guess with this new push for divorce on my wife's part, I'm scared, confused and questioning my own sanity at times. I don't know what to think or believe since she has mentioned divorce many times over the years, cheated on me and sometimes has emotional ups and downs (I think due to her ADHD). I'm not perfect either, but I'm pretty chill in my personality. I'm also fearful of how all of this is and will impact our sons.

Anyway, let me know your thoughts please...