[crossfire]

was wondering if ,for any out there that are in recovery ,does it ever really let you go,or do you find you just learned to control it? i am in well ,was in kind of recovery mode and then feel hard ,but am working on getting back up,but i find even on my good days ,it still is on my mind all the time , even if i mange to eat ,i still think about what i ate all day.does it ever just become normal again?

[Elli-Beth]

I'm about 8 years out of the worst of it, and there are still little daily hints, but nothing overwhelming. The urge to purge is always around after meals, but it only lasts a moment and I've only given in about three times in the past year. I still hate grocery shopping, so I distract myself by wearing an iPod during it. Yes, it does get better!

I spent a lot of years very sick and in hospitals and I've spent the last three barely thinking of it at all. I have small lapses a month or so. During stressful times. But outside of those lapses I eat healthy and don't think about purging afterwards. It does come and with hard work. I heard the statistics of recovery in eating disorders and I said "watch me". I didn't fall into a cycle of self doubt and pity.

[tinybrowngirl]

Originally Posted by crossfire

was wondering if ,for any out there that are in recovery ,does it ever really let you go,or do you find you just learned to control it? i am in well ,was in kind of recovery mode and then feel hard ,but am working on getting back up,but i find even on my good days ,it still is on my mind all the time , even if i mange to eat ,i still think about what i ate all day.does it ever just become normal again?

Listen because this is one of the few times someone will give you an honest answer; it never goes away completely. Compare it to someone that has a disability; they may have a clubbed foot but they still learn to walk though it is never as effortless as if they didn't have the impairment. To what extent I think depends on sevaral variables; I've never dealt with Anorexia but have friends who have. I am bulimic, have been for nearly 25 years. I love food too much to go without it. What works for me is nutrition. Brown rice is a life saver for me; it keeps me full and is nutritious. If I gain weight I can lose it with brown rice and lots of fruit and vegetables.
That's a problem many bulimics have; our bodies don't easily let go of food and we find it increasingly difficult to lose any weight gained by normal eating. You have to commit to working hard to eat healthy and keeping it down. The best way is to plan something right after eating; like walking the dog; fresh air and change of scenary does wonders.
Good luck hon, never give up!

[geniousjess]

hasn't let me go yet, the only thing i could ever want is to be free from this, and as more time passes i become more and more resigned to the fact i may never be free.

[crossfire]

Originally Posted by geniousjess

hasn't let me go yet, the only thing i could ever want is to be free from this, and as more time passes i become more and more resigned to the fact i may never be free.

I understand ,that is how i feel that no matter how i long for the days that this was not apart of me , i can never get those days back.this will always be wit me.

[tinybrowngirl]

Originally Posted by geniousjess

hasn't let me go yet, the only thing i could ever want is to be free from this, and as more time passes i become more and more resigned to the fact i may never be free.

That's why it so important that our young girls don't take this road. What good is it to be thin when you're dying a little more each day? or your teeth and hair fall out? what a deception!

My best game plan is to eat healthy and often, never let myself get hungry
Accepting that it will always be a fight; we MUST fight ladies and never give up!