[inkblot]

I am so fed up with work tonight. My mood is totally against eating and why the heck even bother?! Who gives a crap?! I've lost about ten pounds the past few weeks as of this past weekend. I haven't weighed myself today, but I can't wait until I am able to tomorrow. It should easily be a few pounds less, at least. Days like today at work do NOTHING for me if I am supposed to be eating. If my weight is about where I think it is, then in about two more pounds it could be at the "anorexic" level. Does it help that a friend at the gym (who has been underweight since we met almost two years ago) told me that her weight has gone down again to 104 lbs? We are close in height, and it seems closing in on similar weight. I get stress and I my reaction to it is that I need to take lax pills and stop eating to flatten my stomach, to liedown and see my stomach lay at a 90-degree angle to a ribcage cliff. WHERE can I find the perfect life? The perfect job?! I left two voicemails for my T about work tonight. I am trying to resist another one. If I stay at this job into next week, I will be severely limited on when I can see him. Not good.