Weight gain and triggering comments

I've been eating more and trying to recover for nearly two months now. The first month or so, I didn't gain any weight at all. The second month, I rediscovered my love for ice cream and I've finally started to put the weight back on, but I'm still disordered enough that the weight gain is bothering me.

My parents keep on commenting on the weight gain. I know they're trying to encourage me, but a lot of the time, what they say is triggering. It's hard enough to deal with weight gain, it's even harder knowing that other people are noticing it. And I've tried to tell them that, but they just don't get it.

How do I deal with this?

I sometimes am just NOT nice enough to tell them....."shut up & don't say anything if you really care". Be honest with them & tell them that it's only making things worse because of what you said here......

Knowing it yourself is one thing but having others notice the weight gain is a whole other thing & wanting to look thin is still part of the issue that honestly doesn't go away that easily.

I know that even though I'm at a healthy weight now....I liked the thinner look of me & the thinner look of REAL others who I do tend to compare myself to. I always wished that I was naturally as thin as others were without having to NOT eat at times to get to that point. So having others say that they can see a gain in my weight....is definitely NOT a positive thing in my mind even though it's a healthy thing. Trying to keep my weight at that healthy balanced weight where I'm still satisfied with my looks & my weight is healthy takes more control than it takes to continually restrict & continually loose weight IMO.

I am sure you will be able to figure out how to explain it to them so that they WILL understand....because their understanding IS IMPORTANT....just as much as your understanding that being healthy is important.....it's a two way street.

I would recommend an open conversation and tell them that they are hurting you. They are trying to help, so give them something to help you with. Maybe be there for you? I wish you the best of luck.

Hello again and good evening hunny. Yes, it indeed IS quite simply horrible when anybody says to you ''oh you've gained weight'' ~ for us there couldn't be a worse thing said to us. Yes, we are trying to either gain small amounts of weight, or stay stable. I have gained quite a bit since I started taking different Psych meds but it happened over approx. one year, so was sneaking up on me!! However, I knew I had to do something fast to get back to my usual weight (which though original weight, it's low due to severe restricting). I've had all of the ED's over the past 30 years or more. I've been huge (YUK!) and I've been hospitalised due to anorexia/bulimia. I also think it's my advancing age (55) which makes loosing difficult. I've had the most AWFUL AWFUL last year trying to loose the weight that the meds made me gain, going on a cruise didn't help as there was sooooooooooooooo much excellent food I just never damn well stopped eating! I just COULDN'T loose the weight. However, at last I'm slowly loosing BUT I find people keep coming up to me and saying ''oh you look so much better now'' and I say it's because I've gained weight, so their reply is ''great, keep going and gain more weight'' ARHHHHHHHH Could anything be said any worse???? Immeidatly someone says I look better, I go straight into panic and anxiety, promise myself I won't eat for a few days etc etc. This is the way I carry on, up and down on the weighing scales. So YES I DO UNDERSTAND YOU hunny, really I do. I'm almost frightened of myself, my huge appitite which sometimes I can't control. I can't have ice cream in the house because I will want it all day, then go to bed and think I'm good for resisting..................................then I can't get to sleep for thinking of that ice cream downstairs. I then come back downstairs to eat the lot.............. BIG BIG PANIC! Yes I do understand. HUGS.

I ended up telling my Mom in the middle of a panic attack that I couldn't stand people commenting on my weight. I wish I'd been a little more diplomatic and not made her feel bad, but she promised she wouldn't do that anymore.