[tessredsky]

Just had a binge.. and the guilt and practically self hatred feelings are so extreme.
I feel so alone. And empty. I always am trying to fill the emptiness with something and tonight it was food.
If my roommates was here I was attempt to purge, (it isn;'t always successful when I try)

I just want this to stop.
I don't even know what triggered it.

[CANDC]

Hi tessredsky, sorry you had a binge and are feeling guilty. Here is an article that may help. Living with Binge Eating Disorder | Psych Central

6 Common Eating Disorder Myths | World of Psychology

Welcome to Psych Central (PC). I am sorry you have suffered from multiple challenges. Glad you have joined our community. I find Psych Central helps me find answers where before there were only questions. There is so much here. It is like a buffet of help, everyone picks what they like the best.

Besides being an active participant in helping oneself at Psych Cental, many people also help support each other by replying to other people's posts. Many people who are actively involved in Psych Central find it helps take them out of their own problems to develop empathy for others. And their problems are more manageable the more they help others.

Many people here at PC find they can share these feelings and what they are going through with the confidence that people go through similar things and can empathize. So many forums are offered as well as Chatrooms (after you have 5 posts or comments on others posts).

You can also be an active member in other ways like supporting others in their questions, reading articles and posts http://forums.psychcentral.com that are applicable to your area of concern.

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

[estrella]

Hi there.

It's hard reading about how someone is struggling. I'm all too familiar with the topic of eating disorders. I've gotten better over the years, but from someone who is still struggling, here's what I think (not that it amounts for much, but here goes).

Stop, and force yourself to stay in one spot for a certain time. I do this when I want to binge or purge, and I sit still, sometimes literally on my hands, until the urge has passed. Sometimes it helps to go for a walk to help clear your mind. (And sometimes I abuse exercising and ridicule myself for not "doing enough." If you opt to walk it out, repeat to yourself that you're not walking to compensate; you're walking to feel better. It helps.)

Journal. To get to the underlying cause of what's happening, try writing about the event itself. Any thoughts you have about it work, and you can branch off to things that you think may have triggered it. Write about your feelings that day, current weather (meteorologist style? nah), family, friends, any stressors you know you have that will help you put together the big picture.

Also in a journal, explore your feelings in depth. What do you want in your life? What do you want but don't have....? Are you pushing yourself too hard and forgetting that you need to forgive yourself for mistakes and mishaps? These are some things I constantly have to remind myself of in order to understand why I feel empty. And it's often.

Forgive. One thing I stress so much when posting on here is that it is vital to forgive. Whether it be from twenty years ago, or today, your parents or yourself, it's necessary to forgive. If you don't let things go, they turn to poison, and the only person it affects is you.

So, yes, you binged. Yes, you want to fill your emptiness. Yes, you want to stop. Forgive yourself first. It's a sign of self love, I suppose, and it works.

I hope you read this and get something from it. All the best, cheers. *hugs*