Im going on my 4th week of not B&P. That great. Sorta. But Ihave been eating allot of foods I shouldn't. I feel like I'm gaining weight. I'm not sure if its even better that im not purging if Im still eating allot more. I'm just discouraged by my weight gain.

Didn't quite reach my fouth week.

[gloria]

I'm so sorry to hear that!
But every day is a new start .... just hung in there and don't give up.

gab

My bulimia is getting out of control. I almost went 4 weeks without purging and now I am purging 3 times a day. I feel so out of control and depressed! My therapist just got back in town. We play phone tag, but I feel so hopeless with that relationship because I know Im leaving for school soon. I also know I can barely afford it. I feel so sad. I'm not sure what is wrong with me. I stopped taking my depression meds for two days but I doubt it could take effect that quickly. Maybe its just pms.

[gloria]

PLEASE call United Way for a referral with a T on the sliding scale. They'll tell you who is available close to where you're going.
Also, going out of your meds may not be helping.

Sweetie, we care a whole lot more than you know and we want you to be ok.

gab

awwwwwww.. you made me cry. Thanks so much for being so caring and listening, Gab!!!

[gloria]

So how have you been?

gab

Things are getting more under control. I saw my therapist for the first time in three weeks yesterday. She was amazed at some of the conversations that I had with my mom. She sort of apoligized for letting us get into some sensative areas right before she left. I got allot out. I could talk to her for hours I think. One things she tells me is that I dont emotions and that I put them somewhere. I don't really get that. How does one put emotions somewhere? What does that mean?

I pray allot that God helps me heal through this. That he will help me find the emotions, the anger, sadness, ect and work through it so I can get better.

Thanks for checkin up on me

[gloria]

I know what she means about the emotions, is a defense mechanism.

But don't worry too much about it. I think I reply to another of your posts that something I do is watch a movie that is a true story, most of them are very emotional and I let the tears roll. It is easies to cry about something that has nothing to do with me.

gab