OverEating addiction

I have overcome a great deal in my life and mentally I am in a good place for the first time of my life. There is still one issue that is hanging over me. I am extremly over weight becasue I eat all the time. Food is my drug, and it was a way to make me feel good when everything in my life was bad. Now, it is just an addiction I need to stop. Not all together! I just need to eat normal portions and stop going crazy all the time. I want know how to figure out how regulate this, or how to overcome this last addiction. Does anyone have a silimlar experiences? Why am I thinking of what to have for lunch when I am eating breakfast? Other addictions can be all together stopped, but I have to moderate this one. How?

Doing other things might help? Do you work or can you go out and do other "chores" or work on developing other interests?

I've gotten so I throw away most leftovers. I don't bring food home from restaurants and don't keep the rest of the pizza after the 3-4 pieces I eat tonight. I work on paying attention to whether the food tastes good or not and when I realize it doesn't, I throw it out/don't eat anymore of it. If you can't taste the salty goodness of the potato chips anymore, put them away. I learned the hard way, when I had a cold and couldn't smell or taste at all, I ordered McDonald's french fries but couldn't taste them and realized I was still eating them anyway! It actually made me angry, because I couldn't taste them and wanted so badly to be able to so kept eating them "hoping" :-) That's when I realized a lot of my eating doesn't make sense.

When I get anxious about stopping eating I remind myself I can eat again, when I get hungry; it's not going to be the last time in my life I get to go out to eat at a restaurant :-)

There are some good-for-you foods I really like that I buy more of than other foods? I eat an apple a day :-) and always have bananas, oranges and other fruits I like. I'm too lazy to make salads so I buy the prepared carrot sticks and celery, etc. and I love artichokes so often buy them as a whole meal. I take time with my eating and pay attention to what I'm thinking and how eating "this" meal/food feels and when anxiety startes, etc. When I find myself in the refrigerator and don't quite realize how I got there :-) I think back to what I was doing/thinking immediately before and often now, find the "trigger" that made me want to escape. Eating is a pleasant escape so it makes sense to go there. Now I kind of drag myself back to what I was thinking to see if I can resolve it, without the undeserved mini-vacation :-)

I've put "shock" objects in my cabinets and refrigerator, books :-) and other things I like to see how I feel about choosing those things instead of food.

Buy less of the things you eat too much of? Don't discontinue them completely but "put off" buying them whenever you can. I'll be attracted to chips or popcorn or candy, etc. in the grocery store but then decide "next time" because I also hate to have to carry so many bags to the car :-) Shop with a list and don't allow things not on the list.

I have to make sure there are lots of "easy" to eat foods that I might like or I'll get into the snack food or overdo it on the food not quite as satisfying, trying to put quantity where quality should go. If I run out of my bagels, I'm inclined to do 4 slices of bread with butter so I either try not to run out of bagels (which I'll eat in moderation and appropriately) or have enough backup choices, sort of similar (small bowl of whole grain cereal) that don't involve butter and jelly, etc. LOL If it gets so I'm raiding my husband's snacks (he has cheap cakes and ice cream and things I, fortunately, don't normally like/eat) then I know it's time to go to the store again for more good stuff for me!

It takes a long time to change behavior and not to enjoy thinking about something you enjoy thinking about! So, I try not to censor my thoughts; I read cookbooks and think up schemes whereby I have to try one recipe a week from one of them or something creative like that. Make your food a bit hard to "get" by cooking real meals instead of settling for "fast"/frozen/microwavable food. I'm spoiled for breakfast because my husband will make my breakfast -- omelette or egg, ham, cheese sandwich; yesterday it was French toast, etc. but I do try to monitor what he's feeding me and either adjust during the rest of the day or ask him to omit the cheese or only put 1 egg on the sandwich, or sometimes, I eat before his "brunch" fixing get started and then do without.

I joined the Weight Watchers online and did that for awhile, spending my own points as I wanted, and that helped me get an idea of how "much" was a good idea to eat during a day. I think it's easy to lose track of how much things add up to but the Weight Watchers plan was helpful there for me and kind of fun trying to "get away with" some stuff and not being able to.

Excellent advice from Perna.

I'd like to add that I drink lots and lots of water (up to a gallon a day) and this really helps me.

When the desire to snack sets in, I brush my teeth. Who wants to snack on a clean mouth?

Just practical advice - changing mindset and behaviour is much harder and I am struggling with that myself.

Good luck.

I know exactly how you feel. I've been gaining weight like crazy recently because all I want to do is eat, eat, and eat. I can be completely stuffed and still eat. I ate an entire bag of chips to myself the other day and realized this is a HUGE problem and if I don't stop I will become obese. It's reckless doing this to ourselves and the outcome can never be good. Plus, I personally feel hideous because of my weight, especially since all my friends are thin.

I think where over eaters should begin is to not necessarily stop eating the food but find the reason why we eat to feel better. Work from the inside out if you know what I mean. If I could figure out why food is filling me more then just physically then maybe I could use another healthier method to fill it instead.

All I've wanted since I've become an adult is to be thin and instead of losing weight I've slowly put on more and more each year. I used to blame two pregnancies but it's no longer excusable because of my eating behaviors.

I agree with each of these posts. I have started to focus on NOT over-eating, and I am not a big water fan so if I find myself in the kitchen staring into the fridge or cupboards I drink some diet coke. That way I am putting something into my stomach without the calories but which is yummy! Also I am very fussy on what I buy on shopping day now. I am resisting buying all the snacks and 'quick-fixes' that I would normally buy and instead have upped the fruit that I buy. But as I said I think the biggest thing for me is having that glass of diet coke when I start thinking of/searching for food.
Good luck with this.

I have struggled with anorexia and bulimia since I was a teen. I am 36 now. My weight often bumped up and down—sometimes by 60 lbs. You are right, food is an addiction. And it is tough because we can’t just stop eating. Moderation is the key, but, man, it is hard to moderate when there is constantly food all around us.

For me food is a control issue, but also it is something that makes me feel good. Just like the drugs I abused, food gives me a certain amount of almost euphoria. My eating seemed to get worse when I quit the drugs because it seemed like food was the only thing in my life that made me feel good.

As I progressed in therapy, I started feeling better about myself and I felt like I deserved to lose the weight. I wanted to be healthy. Also, my doctor told me I needed to lose the weight—which embarrassed me. It was like he was pointing out the obvious. But, he did help motivate me.

A few months ago I finished a 23 month diet. I lost 40 lbs. It was up and down, especially the first 12 months. Sometimes, I lost 1-2 lbs in month, sometimes I gained and then I had good months where I lost more. I think what made my diet successful was setting small goals for myself and accepting that it was going to be a long process.

My weekly goals were small—like make it without having sweets for one week or eat 3 servings of vegetables a day for a week or eat vegan for a week. When I did it a week at a time, it seemed easier. Also, I varied the methods of dieting so I never felt like I was denying myself the same foods all the time. When I had a binge, I tried to make it an isolated incident and not let it become a “way of life.” I am not sure if this is good advice or not, but it worked for me. Also, I had one rule that I never broke—absolutely no French fries or fast food of any kind.

Now, my eating patterns are fairly healthy. I still occasionally binge and I still occasionally have some anorexic tendencies where I deny myself food. But, my weight is staying stable, for the most part I am eating in moderation and when I have a slip, I don’t use it as an excuse to keep doing it. One bad day does not mean I have to have a bad week. To maintain my weight loss I am eating vegetarian or vegan most of the time. But, I allow myself one dinner and one breakfast a week where I can have anything I want—steak, bacon, pancakes…this keeps me from feeling like I am constantly denying myself and gives me something to look forward to.

I am sharing my story with you to let you know that losing the weight is possible. And, you can do it in a healthy way, but it is a long process. Something you have to be committed to long term. It is tough, but it is possible. Today is a good day to start changing your life. I have faith in you—I know you can do it—little by little you will make it. We are all here to support you.

Yes...food is everywhere and there's a lot of it for cheap...massly produced food has definitely contributed to this nations health problems. I can't imagine having the strength to stop where I am in this point. I know of all the tools, but deep in the back of my head I think "I'd rather be happy and fat then never eating and thin"....but I'd do anything to be thin. Food does more for me emotionally then it does physically. Kicking this behavior is going to take a lot of strength and distraction...self discipline, and hope. Hopefully we can both make it through.

I just wanted to add that if I do binge now I try and make a conscious effort of binging on fruit. It doesn't always happen but it has been about a month since my last major binge so I am happy with myself...
Good luck

I'd say the binging behavior is the most destructive despite what it is you binge on. It's not about the calorie and fat intake, it's about the behavior and the reason people resort to it for comfort. To much of anything, even a good thing, is never good. Fruit contains a lot of sugars and some may contain a lot of chemicals. It's beyond dieting and exercising and the desperation to be thin. Over eating and under eating is about something else related to self esteem and a sense of hopelessness and failure. I can truly relate to this.

Thank you everyone. It is very interesting to hear different prospectives on this subject. I have been inproving my diet and stopped eating excessively. I hope I can continue this and get my eating under control. It is my final hurdle!

i cant say mine is an addiction , my eyes are just naturally bigger than my tummy.

You are not alone. I am the most organized person I know. I have it all together, or so people think. I cannot however control the need to eat large amounts constantly. I eat so much at every meal that I make myself feel sick, because I am so full. Which in turn makes me feel worthless, wich then makes me want to eat.

<font color="purple"> I've got the same thing going on. Some days are better then others, I guess it just depends on how motivated I am for weight loss, and how much of a paticular food. On more then one occation I've eaten unil I was so full that my stomach felt as hard as a rock and it was almost difficult to breathe!

And, yet, there are other days where I go through an entire day just by eating a handfull of mini-pretzels and a glass of Cranberry juice.

The only thing that stops me from eating for the sake of eating some days is that every time before I eat something, I just stop myself and think it out. And instead of saying "You can't eat that" say "I can eat this, I'm just saving it for later" </font>

Food is definitely like a drug...I can really relate.

Glad to hear your doing great with the eating dore!

Might I add that what helps me the most is when Im with other people. Ive realised that when Im alone and/or bored I eat and eat excessively, but when I'm with someone I find it easy to say no to food. I dont know if its just me or if it has the same effect on other people, but I find that Im using peoples company for comfort instead of turning to food

Keep up the good work

babyg xxx

Couldn't agree more with that response.....

This is my first post to this board. Although I don't have an ED myself, I am pretty certain that my 12 year old daughter does and am desperate to come up with something to help her.

In reading the posts and replies on this board, in preparation for the thread I plan to start with regard to my daughter's situation, I was moved to reply to DPMe's comments.

So her goes:

First off, I think you are an extremely courageous and diciplined person. It takes guts and determination to come as far as you've gotten and my hat is off to you. You also appear to be a very nice person in taking the time to post your story and thoughts for the benefit of the others on this board.

I came from a family that had its share of substance abuse. Dad was a severe alcoholic, brother and sister were heavy into drugs. Most of my Dad's family, including my Grandfather, had some sort of "history" with booze. A lot (change that to "All") of the bad stuff that happened to us as I was growing up was direclty related to booze and drugs. I saw firsthand how people and families suffered and as a result swore that the same would not happen to me.

So how does a person who's pretty sure that he's got the addtictive genes go about living and enjoying life without ending up like his Dad, Uncles, Grandfather, Sister, etc?

He comes up with a set of "rules" and then sticks to them---just as you did during your 23 month diet. My "rules" with regard to drinking are pretty simple: it's nothing, zero, nada during the week. Not even a sip. On the weekends it's beer only--the hard stuff (wine included) are too easy to overdo so they are "out". If the weekend beer drinking were to lead to problems (gotta be honest here) then it would have to stop also.

So far, the partying "rules" have been effect for about 20 years and I'm somewhat confident now that I won't magically morph into my Dad any time soon. I'm still very careful about what I drink and do not go anywhere near drugs.

Note that I took a lot of heat for this from my friends back in "the day" about just saying "no" when "no" wasn't cool. The ones who knew my Dad's story understood, but the ones who didn't called me every name in the book. The more they tried to goad me into taking a hit or a pill or whatever, the more I resisted. "More for you" I used to say as I would hand them back their bongs.

OK, that being said, about 3 years ago I too realized that I was carrying more than a few pounds that weren't really doing me any good.

After serveral unsuccessful attempts at the starvation diet, I finally gave in to science and read up on the ways in which we use the food we eat. Armed with a newfound knowledge I started subbing sugar for protein and in so doing dropped about 20 lbs in about a month and a half.

I can't tell you how happy I was when the pounds came off! I had finally figured out how it all worked and, now knew that I had the ability to control my own weight from here on out.

In the three years since getting my "eating education", I've put a few back on here and there but have always been able to shed them by simply cutting back on the carbs.

After the initial weight loss I actually got motivated and started going to a local gym. I go three times a week for about an hour and have about 2 and a half years now under my belt.

At first, I started going to the gym so that I could play lacrosse with my daughters and not be wiped out after every session AND so that I could indulge my sweetooth and not put the weight I had lost back on.

After a couple of months at the gym everything was going good, I was holding steady weight-wise and playing ball with the kids wasn't killing me. My energy levels were good, I was sleeping better and I also started nocticing another very nice, but somewhat unexpected side effect:

I started noticing in the car after a workout that I was extremely relaxed and was pretty much always in a great mood. Prior to getting to the gym I'd be keyed up from work, stressed out, annoyed, angry, etc., but leaving the gym, it would all be gone. It's a calm and a serenity that is, I'm afraid, quite addictive. I'm pretty sure I'm hooked anyway.

So my two cents to add to your post would be to:

1. Make up some rules regarding behavior that you want to modify and do your best to stick to them. . The longer you follow your "rules" the easier they are to implement. When you see your intended results start to happen, your successes will keep you going.

2. Educate yourself so that you understand how the things that you want to change work. Once you know this, you can formulate a game plan that you can execute to acheive the results you desire.

Although we can't make all or our little beasts go away completely, I think we actually can manage them to the point where we don't live in fear and they don't run our lives.