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#1
Sep 18, 2014, 11:38 AM
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So I have a real problem with people being close to my face. I don't know if I've always been like this or not tbh but I've been like this as long as I can remember (I'm 33 male). I don't mind touching people or even being close to people (although I do prefer my space) but when someone gets their face remotely close to my face, it makes me really uncomfortable.
If this only applied to strangers, I wouldn't even care but it also applies to my girlfriends. I've never liked kissing very much because of this. A smooch is fine, not a problem at all and every once in a while I get in a mood where I want to "make out" but generally speaking, I don't care much for kissing or just standing or lying with our faces right together. This has been a problem in every relationship I've ever been in even though I've explained it thoroughly and have in my last few relationships told them from the very beginning that I have this thing...which they say they're ok with but the end up not being. Please help. |
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#2
Sep 19, 2014, 07:57 AM
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Hello lookingforadvice1, welcome to Psych Central.
I think everyone has their own personal space limits. There maybe an underlying issue that caused this reaction in you from the past that you are currently unaware of. If you find it is really stopping your relationships, you could try therapy to find out why you have this issue, once you understand you will be able to work on it. It sounds like it causes you some anxiety. You might like to ask your question in the Anxiety, Panic and Phobias forum also. 
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 Pegasus Got a quick question related to mental health or a treatment? Ask it here General Q&A Forum “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein |
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#3
Sep 20, 2014, 09:20 AM
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There are some people who seem to just be that way. I mean people who have to get within three inches of your face to talk to you. this makes me very uncomfortable.
As pegasus says there may be some issue that is causing your personal space boundaries to be as you describe. I know people that no matter where they go they have to sit in a back corner so that they can see the whole room and not have anyone behind them. This is due to past trauma and trust issues.
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The "paradox" is only a conflict between reality and your feeling of what reality "ought to be." -- Richard Feynman Major Depressive Disorder Anxiety Disorder with some paranoid delusions thrown in for fun. Recovering Alcoholic and Addict Possibly on low end of bi polar spectrum...trying to decide. Male, 50 Fetzima 80mg Lamictal 100mg Remeron 30mg for sleep Klonopin .5mg twice a day, cutting this back |
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#4
Sep 22, 2014, 06:36 AM
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Thank you both for the replies. I suppose it's possible that a/some past experiences could be driving but if so, I have no idea what they may be. It definitely causes me anxiety to have people in my face, no doubt about it. The question is why would having my girlfriend of many years in my face? A stranger, I get, but someone I love....I would think I should be typically happy to have her in my face. There's no reason I can think of why I wouldn't want her close to my face or that it would make me uncomfortable.
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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