[Gleak]

Hey guys,

Thanks for taking your time to read this - I hope i'm posting in the right place.

As a young kid through my teenage years, I loved having attention from my friends/family and never had any real social issues.

I'm now in my mid 30's - Married with a a kid (3 yrs old!) and it seems the older I get - the more socially awkward I become.

Ive noticed that i'm having a much harder time maintaining eye contact with those i'm speaking with. I tend to quickly look off to the left or right - only momentarily and I re-focus. It almost seems involuntary and I very much dislike the fact that I do this. It may happen two or three times in a 5 minute conversation.

Kind of gives the impression that i'm uninterested in what the person I happen to be speaking to at the time has to say and this really isn't the case. (at least that's how I feel - nobody has mentioned anything to me about it so i guess it bothers me more than anyone)

Is there something I can do to help with this issue? It was never a problem for me before I don't quite understand whats going on with me lately.

[pegasus]

Hello Gleak, it's something you are super duper aware of but I doubt that the person that you are talking to is analysing whether you are looking into their eyes or not. Sometimes there is a good reason to feel uncomfortable with some people. If it really bothers you, I read somewhere that actually focusing on the eyebrows rather than the eyes can help.

[Dan208]

I do the exact same thing 90% of the time. I feel like my eyes are always shifting away from theirs or I am constantly looking at the floor. It's worse when I'm talking to people that intimidate me (which anymore seems to be almost everybody ).

[Thunder Bow]

Stairing at someones eyes make me uncomfortable too.

[lizardlady]

"Good" eye contact doesn't mean non-stop eye contact. It's natural for us to make eye contact, look away, make eye contact, look away....

Non-stop eye contact can be interpreted as either a form of intimidation (staring a person down) or a sexual invitation.

A suggestion for those who have trouble making eye contact. Look at the person's forehead. They will think you are making eye contact.

[Gleak]

Originally Posted by lizardlady

"Good" eye contact doesn't mean non-stop eye contact. It's natural for us to make eye contact, look away, make eye contact, look away....

Non-stop eye contact can be interpreted as either a form of intimidation (staring a person down) or a sexual invitation.

A suggestion for those who have trouble making eye contact. Look at the person's forehead. They will think you are making eye contact.

Well good i'm glad it's more natural than I thought initially - I never used to waver from eye contact though.

Its probably my hyper-awareness of my inability to maintain eye contact that's making it uncomfortable. o.O

Thanks!