[Paul James]

I am aware that I exist, the problem is, does my brain and body and my emotions exist, especially my emotions? I am a sentimental soul controlled by my emotions which I am tired of. Why do I have these episodes of depression and High Stung plus bipolar episodes? Paul

[Loss4wards]

I wish I could answer that for you, maybe I'd have some answers of my own. Although I've never had the highs (my mother was bipolar) I can relate to the crushing episodes of depression, as well as the constant yearning for an answer to that same question: why? I'm new here too, pm me if you want to talk.

[Princess Chloe]

Hi! I'm also new in this forum and I happen to find this site & forum because I believe I am also one of all the other people who are in this community. Looking for answers and wanting/desiring to get out of this condition. As I evaluate myself for the past years, as far as I can remember, I have had episodes of depression (I don't know yet about being bipolar yet I doubt that I have OCD as well) though I may look normal and trying hard to be, I know deep inside there is something different in me than normal and I don't like it. I had struggled hard to fight away my episodes but I am led to this conclusion that I need to do something about it now to stop it from coming back. So here I am, wanting and doing something to take control of my thoughts and emotions and not my thoughts and emotions taking control of me.

[Protectiva]

Sometimes it is something we will never exactly know why we have mental health issues. Some might say it's genetic, some would say it's the result of the kind of pregnancy your mother had. Some might say it's due to some very early childhood trauma. But either way, the why probably doesn't matter as much as the what do we do about it now? Because we can't change our genes, our mom's pregnancy or go back in time and escape childhood trauma before it happens.

Irrational thoughts exist, and emotions exist. It does get tiresome to feel so led around by thoughts and emotions but there are definitely ways to become more free, more in control. It isn't easy, and it's something you have to keep doing every day, but I believe it can be done.

Self-awareness is the first step to getting more control. Monitoring your emotional state and your thoughts and then being able to recognize when they are irrational or harmful and then coming up with strategies for dealing with them, reducing them, replacing them.

I don't have answers, but I wanted to let you know I relate.