Do you believe that some of your problems were caused by being spoiled and sheltered?

Do you believe that some of your problems were caused by being spoiled and sheltered? Also, I regret that I kinda had a superiority complex that I was the most mature person among kids around my age even though I only felt that because I was a big fish in a small pond. To think that I almost had it made in childhood except for said complex. I think that people should just have gently corrected my mistakes instead of all of it coming to this, and by "this", I mean snotty classmates reading me to filth, trying to tell me what was wrong with me in a sadistic manner. (However mean they may have been, there was still a grain of the truth in what they said, but that in no way justified how they treated me. At the same time however, it's still disillusioning to me that some of their criticisms were true and it wasn't as black and white as them being just a bunch of jealous haters, because I'd like to believe in a black and white world with cartoon villains and heroes who could do nothing wrong.) I used to believe that if only the bubble I lived in my childhood was still there all the way till I graduated school, I would be a lot happier, but I realized that it would probably only mean that the peak of my suffering after realizing my bubble wasn't real would be right now instead of back in the day.

bump.......

Anybody???

I’m not really sure what to say. Do you feel you were spoiled and sheltered, or is someone telling you this? Sounds rather like a mean label. I don’t know enough about you to have much input.

I think you were a victim of bullying, rather than being Spoiled. You just described classic bullying. Bullying is all about control and getting attention. You were being controlled.

I may have been bullied (Actually it's a given), but most of the times I was hurt by a word, it's because there was a grain of truth in it. Yes, I didn't have to listen to every bad word that was said to me, but it's true that I coasted through childhood and failed to learn various unwritten social rules because of all the adults around me that thought I was really smart and ahead of the curve, and while sort of true, it led to the point that I thought I knew everything.

Also, I have to admit that the reason why I'm still ruminating about my frenemies from when I was 16-19 is not even that I'm especially hurt by the specifics of what they said. (I mean, some of the words they said still sting, but it's the bigger picture that makes me all depressed.) As a 15 year old, I created this own hypothetical situation in my head that I was assured was gonna come true without any effort. That was what I wanted someday, and um, sad to say, but I wanted a group of friends with a very specific set of attributes, that's the friggin' problem. I mean, I'm not friendless anymore, but part of me still feels that in order to recover from my traumas, I would have to have a very specific kind of life, one that is out of reach for me.

I blame some of my conditions on being sheltered by an excessively over-protective parent who raised me to be fearful of authority figures and retribution.
I know that it wasn't the parent's fault because they had been raised the same way but, not for the same reasons.
The parent's parents were described as unloving, cold and stern.
The parent was a very uncofident, fearful and anxious person and the other parent who was very confident and self-reliant just wasn't around to offer better advice about how to go about living so, that's why I grew up that way.
Because of this I have had to find ways to better myself and learn how to make adjustments and modifications in order to survive.
Even now I am still learning that there is no end to what I can do with my mind when I am focused and inspired. You can do that too.

EDIT: You have to find something to get ambitious about and then, set out to make it yours.
This world is filled with many riches. Set your sights on the one that appeals to you the most and then, make it your goal to obtain it at any cost.

And don't forget "condescending"....

I know that I did become a bullying victim, but it's true that I was spoiled and I know because I come from somewhere with distinct social classes, and I went to a school for rich people despite only being middle class. And after leaving it, that's when I realized that my bubble wasn't even real, it turns out that's why I was so hurt by the bad words flung at me, not because of the mere fact that people said mean things to me in the first place. I mean, people did try to bully me even in childhood, but while they were capable of getting a rise out of me, they were incapable of making me insecure. Because you know why? I had a "Tell me something I didn't already know about myself" attitude about it all. Whereas the people who made fun of me in my teens, they exposed how much I was living in a bubble, so I did feel like they were telling me something new about myself. Maybe I shouldn't have listened to the insults about how useless I was, but it's true that there was a lot of room for improvement. Shame that the only way I received my much-needed truth tea was through insults with unnecessary sadism mixed in.

Absolutely. Though I don't think I was spoiled. I have to say that I think a lot of the problems in the world right now is due to people being overly sheltered. I had to learn a lot of things that most people were taught by their parents and it was hard. In someways I feel I am still learning.

I was watching this 600 lb life episode and one of the subject was 600 lbs and living with her mom almost completely because her mom never taught her anything and did everything for her. Really sad but at least the participant made a big life change.

i do not think my problems were caused because I was spoiled and sheltered because I was not... My childhood took place in a region with armed violence and my adolescence years were spent in worse conditions. On the top of that, I have lived the life of an immigrant since I was 19....
But, I can certainly say that life experiences do make a difference because you are exposed to realities that take you out of your self-centered state. Those who choose to stay in their bubble will not have much chances of being challenged and their thinking patterns will reflect that.

Admittedly, the fact that my childhood bubble wasn't even real is my last roadblock to recovery from being made fun of for years. It's like, "Yeah, all my haters were wrong about many things, but they were right about that specific thing, now what?" You see, I think in black and white, and because they were right about this one thing, now my mind is convincing me there's no reason for me to feel safe ever. I know it's wrong, but that's how I think. BTW, how am I sure that I'm not just regurgitating what my bullies said? Because all of it is true. In my old school where I spent my childhood, they saw me throw tantrums where I acted like a screaming non-verbal toddler and didn't do much even though I was pushing 13. There were rumors among my classmates that I was some kind of special ed, but teachers just shut up my classmates even though they had a point. Also, they made us speak a different language from the vernacular inside our classrooms. Also, they let me get away with not doing my art projects. That's why I was so crap at teamwork and doing art projects in my teens. And all of it is why I feel so bad about feeling superior to everyone else and thinking I knew everything when I was in fact behind the curve.

I was surrounded by nice, responsible and caring adults throughout my early childhood.

When I went to the hospital and saw the adult staff acting badly towards the patients it was a huge deal for me. I had never seen adults acting that way before. And especially not towards kids.

I was sheltered. My parents were controlling and kept me away from a normal teenage time, anyway. That has caused some of my problems, but through therapy and persistence I am okay now.

what if i'm retarded and everyone is just playing along - conspiracy keanu - quickmeme
This totally was the case for me back in the day.

Well the truth is that you are not better or worse than anyone else. We all have our issues. Your description of your childhood doesn’t sound like you were spoiled or sheltered. Teaching a child to fear authority figures is actually kind of abusive.

What a are you doing now, today to work on what’s bothering you? Have you considered therapy or a life coach, self help groups, etc.

You mean you did not see how messed up one of my complaints was? I was prone to screaming tantrums and authority figures just let me get away with them.

OK, I’m not really understanding what your point is. Are you looking for someone to blame for your behavior ....if your behavior seems unacceptable to you.

All I’m saying is that if you think you have a problem then be proactive and get help. I’m not a professional and can’t really offer any concrete reasons why you are the way you are.

Nope, neither spoiled nor sheltered. Wasn't exactly exposed to the worst of the worst. Did, fortunately, by grace or something, have nurturing and compassion around.

It takes plenty of elbow grease and fortitude to reconcile the past. Resentment is a bitter pill. Hope you can overcome the grieving of what brings forth the question.