FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,223
(SuperPoster!)
7 8,776 hugs
given |
#1
When someone agrees with you but repeats your answer back and then says it in a slightly different way then the way you said it.
My therapist does this and it confuses me because I think to myself “didn’t I just say that same thing?” I don’t think she’s intentionally gaslighting me. I just think she doesn’t understand what I’m going through. My mom did the same thing the other day but it was completely unintentional. I called her out on it and she said it does sound like a weird thing to do. I often think the term gaslight is overused way too much. So I’m just wondering if this is considered it or not. __________________ Ridin' with Biden |
Reply With Quote |
SprinkL3
|
annoyedgrunt84
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since May 2013
Location: Chicago
Posts: 26,409
(SuperPoster!)
10 22.8k hugs
given |
#2
I don’t think it is....this is an attempt at understanding you by rephrasing what you just said.
Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk __________________ Hugs! |
Reply With Quote |
annoyedgrunt84, Mountaindewed, SprinkL3, unaluna
|
Veteran Member
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 720
9 634 hugs
given |
#3
I did want to say that I agree with your statement about gaslighting being overused, I also think that triggered is another obvious example, people who are not psychologists have gotten ahold of these terms and used them in a much broader sense than they were ever used intended.
__________________ "We can hear the night watchman click his flashlight ask himself if it's him or them that's insane"- Bob Dylan 20 mg Citalopram |
Reply With Quote |
lizardlady, Mountaindewed, SprinkL3, Werewoman
|
Grand Poohbah
Member Since Aug 2020
Location: England
Posts: 1,692
3 6,991 hugs
given |
#4
Gaslighting is an attempt to make a person question reality, while denying doing so (e.g. rearranging objects in a room before the other person comes back in, but pretending nothing happened if the person is confused) if questioned.
I agree it’s overused, especially because the use of gaslighting is malicious and can have long lasting psychological consequences for the victims. Not something to be downplayed. |
Reply With Quote |
jeremiahgirl, Mountaindewed, SprinkL3
|
Magnate
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 2,787
5 7 hugs
given |
#5
A therapist will often say back to you what they think they heard in order to be sure they are understanding. It is your opportunity to dialogue with them about the accuracy about a) how you are communicating, and b) how they are understanding.
That isn't gaslighting. That is reflective listening. |
Reply With Quote |
lizardlady, Mountaindewed, Sometimes psychotic, SprinkL3
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,223
(SuperPoster!)
7 8,776 hugs
given |
#6
Thanks for the clarification everyone. People on my Facebook use it so much I just didn’t know or not.
__________________ Ridin' with Biden |
Reply With Quote |
SprinkL3
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,223
(SuperPoster!)
7 8,776 hugs
given |
#7
Quote:
__________________ Ridin' with Biden |
|
Reply With Quote |
RoxanneToto, SprinkL3
|
RoxanneToto
|
Member
Member Since Sep 2021
Location: florida
Posts: 29
2 1 hugs
given |
#8
Quote:
It makes communication difficult b/c when you're trying to explain you got TRIGGERED, ie induced into a panic episode, and the person hears triggered, ie got a little upset, you're already not having the same conversation. And trying to clarify your meaning is just more stress. |
|
Reply With Quote |
SprinkL3
|
Account Suspended
Member Since Oct 2021
Location: DELETED
Posts: 2,752
(SuperPoster!)
2 10.9k hugs
given |
#9
Quote:
It would be good for your to bring this up with your therapist. You can say to your therapist something like, "In our last session, I noticed that you would say ___ when I said ____. To me, it sounded like gaslighting because ____. But I don't want to misjudge you, so can you explain what that is and how that's supposed to help me in session?" -Or something to that effect. Hope you get things patched up with your T. |
|
Reply With Quote |