FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 38,743
(SuperPoster!)
8 9,742 hugs
given |
#1
I don't think so I just want some other opinions. As most of you know I'm a transgender man. I pass and I've never been misgendered or harrased by anyone anywhere in any town or state I've been to even the unfriendly ones.
Anyways, I am only 5'5. Pretty short for a guy. At Dicks Sporting Goods a couple years ago I couldn't reach a hoodie. I asked an employee to help me and he also had trouble but finally got it and said "yeah, I'm short too." I didn't take offense to his comment since he was also calling himself short. What does anyone think? __________________ I'm Blue |
Reply With Quote |
Buffy01, Travelinglady
|
mote.of.soul
|
Super Moderator
Community Support Team Community Liaison
Chat Leader Member Since May 2014
Location: Northeast USA New England
Posts: 17,823
(SuperPoster!)
10 2,351 hugs
given |
#2
@Mountaindewed I try to not judge someone by their physical appearance and that sounds like the employee was doing. Maybe they sensed your discomfort at needing to ask for help. They seem to be trying to put you at ease.
Some of the most fun people I met on the phone in business did not look anything like I imagined when I met them in person. So for me how someone is as a person is not the same as how they appear. @CANDC __________________ Super Moderator Community Support Team "Things Take Time" |
Reply With Quote |
Legendary
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Mid World
Posts: 17,769
(SuperPoster!)
21 7,586 hugs
given |
#3
MD, doesn't sound rude to me. You couldn't reach something and asked for help. Sounded to me like the employee was just trying to make a connection with you.
|
Reply With Quote |
ArmorPlate108, Discombobulated, Rive.
|
ɘvlovƎ
Member Since Nov 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 19,039
(SuperPoster!)
11 14.8k hugs
given |
#4
Doesn't sound rude to me at all.
|
Reply With Quote |
Legendary
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 10,258
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,879 hugs
given |
#5
I’m sure they didn’t mean it as rude, and they were trying to connect with you. But pointing out any flaw in someone may embarrass them, and it’s good manners to not do that in general circumstances like you were in. I’d say it’s about using tact.
__________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T |
Reply With Quote |
Wood Ape
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,585
(SuperPoster!)
6 22.3k hugs
given |
#6
Weighing it all up and taking into account a variety of contextual possibilities, no, it wasn't rude. You probably just chuckled when he said it. I would've.👍
__________________ "A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."- Dōgen
Last edited by mote.of.soul; Aug 25, 2023 at 01:21 AM.. |
Reply With Quote |
Member
Member Since Apr 2023
Location: Michigan
Posts: 365
1 106 hugs
given |
#7
Meh. That's a nothingburger. Maybe not the most tactful thing in the world to say but it was pretty innocent.
|
Reply With Quote |
Crowned "The Good Witch"
Member Since Jun 2009
Location: Wonderland
Posts: 11,536
(SuperPoster!)
15 1,318 hugs
given |
#8
No, that wasn't rude. He was just trying to be friendly and trying not to make you feel bad about asking for help.
|
Reply With Quote |
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 49,200
(SuperPoster!)
14 23.3k hugs
given |
#9
No, not rude. Just observant. I'm 4'10"" and have to get lots of help reaching things. I think I make somewhat short people feel good because I'm even shorter. I do get tired of people mentioning it. It only affects my life when I need to reach things.
|
Reply With Quote |
Elder
Member Since Oct 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 5,229
(SuperPoster!)
5 12.4k hugs
given |
#10
I’m 5’2” and often make jokes about challenges of being short with people, if they are short more so as we both know what it feels like.
Having said that I’m more careful what I say to shorter men as I’m aware some men get self conscious about height. But no, I think it sounds like a friendly exchange. |
Reply With Quote |
lizardlady, Travelinglady
|
Legendary
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Mid World
Posts: 17,769
(SuperPoster!)
21 7,586 hugs
given |
#11
Trav, for some reason I always thought you and I were about the same height ( I'm 5'6"). Boy was I wrong!
|
Reply With Quote |
Travelinglady
|
Magnate
Member Since Apr 2016
Location: Somewhere in South America
Posts: 2,339
8 1,069 hugs
given |
#12
Quote:
I'm about your height and would probably think too that the salesperson was just making a light comment about the challenges that come with being short. |
|
Reply With Quote |
Discombobulated, Travelinglady
|
Legendary
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 10,164
(SuperPoster!)
7 10.1k hugs
given |
#13
Quote:
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
|
Reply With Quote |
Discombobulated, lizardlady, Travelinglady
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 49,200
(SuperPoster!)
14 23.3k hugs
given |
#14
|
Reply With Quote |
Discombobulated
|
Elder
Member Since Jun 2015
Location: Czechia
Posts: 5,156
9 13.4k hugs
given |
#15
Doesn't sound rude at all.
__________________ Dx: Bipolar type 1 Psych Medications: * Tegretol XR (carbamazepine ER) 800 mg * Lamictal (lamotrigine) 150 mg * Seroquel XR (quetiapine ER) 600 mg I also take meds for blood pressure, cholesterol, and tachycardia. |
Reply With Quote |
Buffy01
|
New Member
Member Since Aug 2023
Location: New York
Posts: 3
1 |
#16
It's great that you're open to hearing different perspectives! It sounds like you've had a positive experience regarding your identity as a transgender man, which is truly heartening. The anecdote you shared about the interaction at Dicks Sporting Goods is interesting. Sometimes, people make comments without intending any harm, like the employee acknowledging his own height as well. It's essential to remember that humor and camaraderie can arise from such interactions, as long as they're respectful and well-intentioned. As for your height, it's important to recognize that there's a wide range of heights among men, and everyone's experience is unique. Height doesn't define masculinity or one's worth. Confidence and self-assuredness often make a bigger impact than physical attributes. Embracing who you are and owning your experiences can be empowering for both yourself and others who might be going through similar situations. Keep shining as your authentic self! What are your thoughts on how such interactions can promote understanding and camaraderie among people of different backgrounds and experiences?
|
Reply With Quote |
Legendary
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Mid World
Posts: 17,769
(SuperPoster!)
21 7,586 hugs
given |
#17
I tend to create a mental image of people I've come to know on the forums. It's kind of like creating a mental image of characters in books. Funny thing is that I am frequently WAY off like I was with your height.
|
Reply With Quote |
Buffy01
|
Buffy01
|
Magnate
Member Since Apr 2016
Location: Somewhere in South America
Posts: 2,339
8 1,069 hugs
given |
#18
I think it's pretty common to create a mental image of people you haven't seen in person. I've had situations where I knew someone before meeting them in person and they've made comments that I look like they expected or didn't look at all like they expected. I've done that sometimes too.
|
Reply With Quote |
Legendary
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 10,164
(SuperPoster!)
7 10.1k hugs
given |
#19
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
Reply With Quote |
Reply |
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Forum | |||
Employee attraction | Relationships & Communication | |||
Problem Employee | Bipolar | |||
Advising an Employee | Psychotherapy |