[jbug]

I am still at my parents house which is going better than I thought it would. Dad is starting to get on my nerves but I know why he is being the way he is. He is working on my parents taxes and that always stresses him out because they always have to pay in. So we just walk on eggshells until he gets them done and he gets back to normal. Right now he harping on how I do my food journal. I am doing it the way my doctor requested but dad wants me to put down how many grams of protein, carbs, etc. I don't need to do that but for some reason dad thinks I do. So we will do it dad's way until he calms down.

I go back and see Dr. Baker (my surgeon) on April 30. I may get to go home after that. I got busted for smoking because in a moment of weakness I had bummed a couple of smokes from my neighbor guy and when I was in the hospital Dr. Baker tested my urine for nicotine. It of course came up positive for nicotine in the last 2 weeks and I got a lecture which of course I deserved but I think that contributed to me not going home. I am beating myself up for giving in to my craving but there is nothing I can do about it now. I just need to hop back on the wagon and go on. At least being out here at my parents I can't smoke but then again the temptation isn't here. I will work with my T to come up with some strategies for when the temptations come up. One of them is knowing that Dr. Baker can test me whenever he wants to.

But that is what is going on in my life right now.

Jan

[splitimage]

Thanks for posting the update - i've been wondering how you're doing. I'm sorry your Dad is tough to be around right now, I know I get crabby too when I'm doing my taxes, but it's really not fair to take it out on other people.

Sorry you got busted for smoking. I know it's not healthy, but it's a really hard habit to quit, but yeah being tested randomly is a good motivation to not smoke. I know I'm subject to random blood and urine tests for drugs and alcohol as part of the treatment program I'm in, and it's really good motivation for me to stay sober.

Hope you get to go home soon.

--splitimage

[Junerain]

Thanks for the update, if things are going BETTER than planned......hey that's pretty damn good

You sound healthy, well balanced, and like your life ain't bad

Congratulations, jbug. Keep up the good work.

[jbug]

Well last night something wierd happened. I take my night time meds right after supper because most of them I have to take with food or my tummy gets upset. So anyway I took my meds and my parents left for church and I was watching T.V. Well they got back and when they got back my dad said I was slurring my words and having a hard time walking. I know about the walking thing that is normal for me after I take my night time meds, I take so many that they say on the bottle that could happen. I don't know about the slurring of my words.

I have put in a call my Pdoc to see what he thinks. I go to therapy this afternoon and plan on talking with her about it and see if she will talk with Dr. H about it. I scared my dad I could see the fear in his face. This happened one other time I was out here. I'm not sure why it happens sometimes and not all the time. Maybe I was just extra tired yesterday.

Jan

[sabby]

((((((((((((((( jbug ))))))))))))))))))

It's good to hear from you as I was wondering how you were doing.

It sounds as though you are doing well to work around your dad's intense moods at the moment, understanding where they are coming from and why. That's half the battle in dealing don't you think?

I'm a smoker too, so I know how hard it is to kick the habit to the curb and make it stay there. I also know that it can take many starts and stops before we get it kicked for good.....so keep up the great work!

I am concerned about your slurred speech and walking difficulties. Please make sure that there are no physical reasons for you to have been that way and that it was only the meds.

Wishing you well!

sabby