[jbug]

I am shaking my head in disbelief in what my home health nurse did. I am trying to decide if it was a nice thing or an insult.

I am leaving on Friday for my nephew's graduation from high school and today she brought me a gift certificate for a hair cut. She kept stressing how good her hair stylist was and how it would make me feel better etc. I just got my hair cut. She told me that when she saw me next week she wanted to see me with a different hair style. I went online and found one that is still close to what I have but just a little different. I like the way my hair looks. I just grew it out and it took me a long time to grow it to the length it is and just cut layers into it to give it more volume and decided to get it done the way Lisa Rinna has her hair done. It is still about shoulder length but has choppier layers from the picture I printed.

So am I overreacting to be hurt that thinking there is something wrong with the way I look?

Jan

[splitimage]

Oh man - that's what I'd call a well intentioned, but totally innappropriate blunder. She probably meant well and wanted to do something nice for you, and may have been thinking along the lines of "I like getting my hair cut, probably jbug would too." I'm sure no insult was intended.

But you still have every right to be upset. Your feelings are your feelings, and some gifts are simply never appropriate, unless you know the person really well or they've expressed an interest.

I had a similar reaction once, when i got an email at work asking if I'd like to join a weightwatchers at work meeting. I'm sure the person sending it was just trying to rustle up enough members for a meeting and thought I might be interested, but my reaction was how dare you tell me I need to lose weight.

If it were me, next time I saw her, I'd give the gift certificate back and say something like "I appreciate the thought, but I actually like the way my hair is now."

--splitimage

[Junerain]

You are NOT overreacting- your feelings are real..she was inappropriate..tell her thanks but no thanks!!

[Perna]

I wouldn't be hurt, just express puzzlement to her and explain that you like your hairstyle. I don't think I would have taken the gift or I would have said something like, "What a nice idea! Do you mind if I give it to X, I have a hairstylist I like too and just got mine done the way I like it".

Are you contemplating using it with her hair stylist and getting it done the slightly different way even though you just had it done? I would just save it for next time YOU want it done. It's a gift, she can want you to look how she wants you to look but can't dictate when/how you use a gift and how you feel about how you look.

[Rhapsody]

Originally Posted by splitimage

Oh man - that's what I'd call a well intentioned, but totally inappropriate blunder.

I totally agree..... and OUCH on that - I understand how Jbug must be feeling.