[Roukan]

I need some advice on how to get my eight year old to eat dinner. Tonight we had fried chicken and rice. Walker my eight year old is the only one that refuses to eat what everyone else is eating. He will beg for a TV dinner or pop-tart. We have tried to say, you will eat what everyone else is having or go to bed hungry. He just gets up in the middle of the night and sneaks food (pop-tarts). We fix our food very bland, no onions and things like that. I am to the point of locking all the snack foods up and telling him, he will eat what we eat or he will have nothing. I believe he will get hungry enough and eat what ever we give him. His mother says that is child abuse and we can't do that (in front of him). Someone please give me some advice.

[lizardlady]

Roukan, I'd suggest following through with your idea. He eats what and when everyone else eats or he goes hungry. It is NOT child abuse. You are providing him with food, he is choosing not to eat it. A few missed meals and he will start eating.

Meanwhile, can you and your wife discuss this sort of thing away from the kids? Parents have to present a united front to the kids. You can disagree as much as you want in private but you both need to send the same message to the kids or they will use the difference of opinion to drive a wedge between you.

[Yoda]

My son was a picky eater too. I asked him to taste one bite of a food he had never tasted. He only had to taste it, not swallow it. It was okay for him to put the food in a napkin after he tasted it if he didn't want to eat it (at home, we didn't do this at restaurants).

[IceCreamKid]

Originally Posted by Roukan

I need some advice on how to get my eight year old to eat dinner. Tonight we had fried chicken and rice. Walker my eight year old is the only one that refuses to eat what everyone else is eating. He will beg for a TV dinner or pop-tart. We have tried to say, you will eat what everyone else is having or go to bed hungry. He just gets up in the middle of the night and sneaks food (pop-tarts). We fix our food very bland, no onions and things like that. I am to the point of locking all the snack foods up and telling him, he will eat what we eat or he will have nothing. I believe he will get hungry enough and eat what ever we give him. His mother says that is child abuse and we can't do that (in front of him). Someone please give me some advice.

Please consider making an appointment with the pediatrician or your family doctor to have your son examined. You wouldn't want some underlying medical condition like diabetes or a metabolism disorder to go untreated. Then, I would stop buying pop-tarts for the time being. Instead I would include something sweet with dinner: fruit or pudding.

After consulting with the doctor, and if the doctor agrees, I would instruct the boy to taste everything on his plate. The other thing to do is involve him in the preparation of the meal. From setting the table to clearing the table and helping with dishes to washing vegetables to counting out servings, stirring things under supervision; flouring chicken to be fried; pouring milk; children can do a lot in the kitchen with supervision. There are children's cookbooks, too; he could team up with dad to make a simple meal for the family or a healthy dessert.

It is wrong to deprive a child of nutritious food; but you shouldn't cater to a healthy child's whims either on a nightly basis. You mention you prefer bland food; it could be your child likes things a bit more seasoned. This is another thing to discuss with the doctor.