[Timgt5]

So yesterday, me, my wife and her mom were finishing up the old Christmas shopping. We went to several stores by splitting up.

On the list was my sweet adorable 7 month old niece, Lyla. Of course they decided to send in Bye Bye Baby, the least qualified person in the world, me

Ok I thought "I have a list, how hard can this really be" Then I remembered that every time that is said on "Top Gear" disaster follows.

So with great ambition and an open mind, I confidently strode into Bye Bye Baby, talk about out of place, I felt like a vegetarian pushed into a butcher's shop. So I decided to make an adventure out of this endeavor.

A few take aways

1. At the next board meeting the company should be renamed "Bye Bye to the contents of your Wallet" This stuff's exxpennsivvve!

2, I saw a display of these little baby cars, you know the ones where the kid sticks his/her feet down Flintstone style and makes noises. Apparantly none of these came with a direct shift gear gearbox with flappy paddles, torque vectoring all wheel drive or a trick differential, how the hell is junior supposed to impress anyone when he can't power slide... The little gal I talked to at the counter... Was not amused.

2. I saw a display for one of those harnesses that you strap the infant on the front of your body... When I saw the little pic of the baby with his little arms and legs dangling, all I could think of was that movie Total Recall:

"Quaid, starrrt the reactooorrr, freeeee mars...."

3. There was a display of lullibies (CDs) some based on pop songs, others on classical or country. Apparantly heavy metal is not really represented, kind of discriminitory don't you think?

4. There is a whole lot of Diaper related things in there, seems to me scientests could save Americans a whole lot of money if they could figure out a way to geneticly modify people not to crap until they can be potty trained.

5. I saw a mini leather recliner. I see we are training our kids from an early age to be obese beer swilling football fans...

6, Back to the car earlier I saw also a little plasitic ramp to run the car down, for 100 dollars, holy cow you know the little one will use it twice and laugh at dad for wasting 100 bucks on this piece of junk.

Anyway, I got all of the items I was supposed to get and made it out ok, and I have played my little part in helping Lyla have a memorible first Christmas.

my time there has convinced me... I Still do not want to have any kids... ever

[Turtleboy]

haha !