My adult daughter is unfortunately sick with a rather sloppy cold she's had for a couple of days now. She has a little bit of concern for her autoimmune system because she has no fever, not even a small elevation, and she wonders if that means she's not fighting off the infection.

I empathized with her that it's frustrating to be sick and not have a fever. In my day, that meant you couldn't "prove" you were sick, although it's obvious to me from a single glance at my daughter that she doesn't feel well. This led to a discussion on how things were done during my childhood days, 1960's and 1970's. If you weren't burning up, they assumed you weren't sick. You must be trying to get attention, or to weasel out of school or chores. I remember in seventh grade, a classmate was telling me how she'd been puking her guts up, but the school nurse wouldn't call her parents and send her home, because she wasn't running a fever. That was consistent with my experience too. Whether it was the school nurse or my own mother, the attitude seemed to be, no fever means you're fine, so get your butt up and go to class.

Which then brought to mind that when I was in sixth grade, I broke my collarbone on the playground during recess. Since it was "so late in the day," they decided not to bother calling my mother, and sent me home as usual on the school bus! Do you think THAT decision would be made nowadays?

What noticeable ways has public policy and societal mindset changed since your childhood?

[Maven]

Bullying has changed. It still happens like it did when I was young, but there are more avenues for bullies to use these days. However, because of this radical change, there's more attention to bullying and it's not as accepted as a "kids will be kids" thing. Frankly, I feel bitter about that. I was bullied and people didn't usually stand up for me or do anything to the bullies. It may not have been as pervasive because they didn't have the Internet back then, but it still cut deep. Also, back then, if someone at school hit you, they didn't call the police or bring legal action. You just had to suffer and nobody would be punished, at least not legally (as I do think they should be--assault is assault).

I remember feeling proud for standing up for myself by telling the teacher on a kid who messed with me. I told my dad, and he told me not to be a "tattletale." That hurt a lot.

Right, the child protection laws have also radically changed, and that causes resentment in me sometimes. I see children removed from their homes for what looks to me like borderline cases, and I think, "But when it was happening to me, it was OK?"

[Britneigh]

The dependency on electronics and that being okay astonishes me. Now, I'm not very old (just turned 21 today actually) but the fact that 8+ year old kids are on Facebook and twitter and all of these social sites is crazy! I know 8 year olds with iPhones, I didn't even get my own cell phone till I was 17 and driving so my parents could get ahold of me and in case of an accident I could reach them. I didn't get an iPhone till I could pay for it myself either, my first phone was a cheaper basic phone and I was happy with that. I wasn't on Facebook either till I was in High School, which now days there's girls from the barn still in elementary school adding me as friends. I don't really get it personally. When I was that young I wasn't worrying about followers on Instagram or taking 'selfies' on FB, I was outside playing with my friends or drawing of riding my horse...just doing kid stuff!

I think the other big thing I see is the age which younger people are resorting to self injury/eating disorders/substance abuse/alcohol. I mean, I SI'ed when I was 11, but not many other 11 yr olds were hiding cuts...most were still playing outside with friends and just being kids. It's heartbreaking to see 12 year olds starving themselves to feel wanted, 14 year olds smoking weed because its 'cool'. I remember even when I was I'm high school riding the bus home and younger kids swearing and calling each other names that I still don't say! They were like 10!! It was honestly ridiculous!

It's kind of sad because honestly with the technology and social pressures, childhood really doesn't exist anymore. Kids are becoming tiny adults and aren't really being kids. That's just my thoughts.

[big zero]

The biggest change I see is in the way education is being handled, especially in elementary and sometimes middle school.

Back in my day, and I'm not even that old, if you had bad grades you had to study harder or there'd be heck to pay. (Seriously. I got grounded for my first, one and only C in elementary for two weeks with no TV).

Nowadays, however... if a kid has bad grades, the teacher's to blame because his or her teaching methods "aren't appropriate for the kid's learning style". Or the school has a "stressful environment". Or "not enough is being done to encourage the kid to learn". My mum is a middle school teacher and she heard all these, and more. She even got reported to the principle once for sending a bully to detention. I remember I was so p****d off I wanted to find the parent who reported her and key his car. (I was 16 and stupid, what can I say...)

At least physical violence in school isn't tolerated anymore. When I was a pupil we had a teacher who used to slap us around in elementary, then another one in middle school, and a sports teacher who groped girls' butts and made lewd remarks and no-one did anything about any of these. I hear that's not the case anymore.

I wish I could say that the profanity and pot use among children today was "different" from my childhood, but unfortunately I saw it then too. My mother could be oblivious. There was one instance where my then 14-year-old brother and a friend of his trapped a garden snake and blew pot smoke at it until it got a contact high, then let it go and watched it try to slither away in several different directions at once. My mother didn't believe it happened. "Oh, they're only little boys. Where would they get pot?" Yeah, that's the dream world she lives in, where teenagers are still "little children," and therefore when they talk about doing something, it's all talk. I have tried in vain to tell her that yes, there are people in the world who will furnish 14-year-olds with pot, and it happened then too, but in her eyes I'm still a little kid myself (I'm 48) so what do I know? I guess it's easier for her to tell herself I'm a naive, gullible child for believing their "big talk" than to admit it's true and those things happen.

I do feel it's awfully jarring to hear hard core profanity out of a voice that hasn't even changed yet, but I can't say that's different, because I was hearing it in the 1970's too. And saying it. That's what I lived. I'm far less likely to swear now, as a middle-aged woman, than I was as a ten-year-old child among other ten-year-old children (but no adults.) Is it that the children will now swear openly in the presence of adults, that's different? Yeah, "free speech." Even adults nowadays seem to think cussing with every breath is what free speech is all about, as opposed to what it actually is, which is the right to disapprove of the job the President is doing, or tell the cops you don't think they handled that situation well, without fear of going to jail.

I wonder if that adult supervision I touched on is looked at differently nowadays. Maybe the reason kids used to go out and play in the yard but now they're on electronic devices all the time is, nowadays if you let kids go play out the yard, somebody's going to yell that they're unsupervised, and that's neglect. Parents almost can't do anything nowadays without someone hollering that it's somehow abusive--and again with the resentment, because my parents could cuss me out, slap me, leave marks, and all that, and it was OK then. And yes, I did tell.

I just had a talk with my own mom. Shes into her eighties. She thinks its perfectly fine to hit, slap, pinch, turn your ears and was very verbally abusive to me. I'm just having a little rble. I can't think of anything to add to this conversation but I get that technology, I think, is the cause for obesity rising, bullying, peer pressure and influence from the media, causes all new concerns for our kids these days. I remember too having to be really obviously sick before getting help at school. Or teachers getting away with physically punishing kids. But to me school and child protection laws are much better overall. I don't think there was any child protection where I'm from anyways. And seatbelts, parents used to smoke with the windows rolled up and not strap us in lol.

[liveforfish]

Respect. I miss it. I'm 39. In my day people respected each other. We obeyed our parents and authority figures. We knew right from wrong. We were taught values and morals. We were taught to work hard, that nothing in life was free. We knew the value of money and saving for treats we desired. Everything wasn't handed to us and we did not think we deserved it. It was a privilege to drive, own a car, have a cell phone, own a TV, computer, etc. and our parents had the right to take them away.

[Maven]

First, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRITNEIGH!!! 21! All right!!!

Lovebird, my mother treats me like a child, too, and I'm 45. I think she gets that a small kid can get his/her hands on drugs, but I'm not sure. I don't have kids and we're not generally around kids together. But I can tell you this. I wanted to see the movie, Porky's, back when I was around 14. My mom said she'd take me, so I was all excited, even if I was going with my mom. When we got out, she was mad, because she said she thought the movie was about Porky Pig!!! She actually thought a 14-year-old wanted to go see a movie about a cartoon pig she hadn't been into since she was a wee thing.

I don't think technology is the only reason for rising obesity, but it makes it easier to get lazy and obese. Technology is a tool. It can be used for good or evil. Most people like convenience, and latch onto it whenever they can.

[tinyrabbit]

I don't think people have things handed to them nowadays. The economy is worse and people don't have jobs for life any more. In the UK, employment prospects for young people are shockingly bad.

People didn't respect each other back then, unless you think sexism, tolerance of domestic violence and indifference to child abuse constitute respect.

Lol Maven, I remember Porky's..that's a funny story. And your right technology has its good points and can be used to educate, but so can books. Both my kids can read but would choose not too because its too easy to get away with not doing it.