(Not so) Gentle Thoughts for Today

Birds of a feather flock together... and crap on your car.

A penny saved is a government oversight.

The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

He who hesitates is probably right

Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are " XL."

If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "Theirs."

I love these ..............

but this one RULES!!

"The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.
"

These are all so true, but HILARIOUS!!

So true................................so very true!

Maybe i should create a rift between my fat and my body... hmmm *thinks up awful schemes to break up friendships*

naw, i couldnt. Id feel bad

"The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment."

i should work on that second part lol

I think most of us could use some practice on that one, Mellors!

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If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

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HE HE HE HE HE !!!!!!!!!!

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The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

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isnt this the truth!!!! when my momma would use my middle name "Melissa Rene'" i knew i was dead meat!!!!! lol

I didn't have a last name so I never got any warning except my mom coming at me with my own leather belt! Stupid me always ran into my closet where she could beat away!!

I've changed my name but I've yet to hear "Tomi Renee!!" LOL Isn't it neat that we both have the same middle name??

yeppers!!!!!

I don't have a middle name. Everyone thinks it's weird, but I think it's different. So yey me. Heeheehee

My mom used to call me by my nickname Jil. When she would get really angry with, me which was quite often She would call me by my real name Jilene.

I was sure scared I tell ya