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#1
Mar 03, 2007, 03:24 AM
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The Dog:
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing! 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing! 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing! 5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing! 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing! 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing! The Cat: Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...
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thatsallicantypewithonehand |
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#2
Mar 03, 2007, 06:50 AM
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   still laughing! |
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#3
Mar 03, 2007, 10:39 AM
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#4
Mar 03, 2007, 11:06 AM
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Too funny!!
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#5
Mar 03, 2007, 01:28 PM
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LMo....lol.....!!!
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#6
Mar 03, 2007, 01:32 PM
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#7
Mar 03, 2007, 05:01 PM
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My cat turned off the computer today. That may want to be on the list.
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#8
Mar 04, 2007, 02:25 AM
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__________________
I still dream and I still hope, therefore I can take what comes today. Jan is in Lothlorien reading 'neath a mallorn tree. My avatar and signature were created for my use only and may not be copied or used by anyone else. |
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#9
Mar 04, 2007, 06:06 AM
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That is too funny!!!!!!!!
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#10
Mar 04, 2007, 04:30 PM
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Now we bought a runner rug for our kitchen in front of the sink. Fruit all down it and leaves, black back ground. The cat has issues seeing. He thinks the fruit is moving and the leaves. He is really having a good time chasing them.
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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