[Steiner of Thule]

I don't quite understand why people act offended over certain things. Mainly when it involves things that never happened towards them or anyone they knew. Do people just like to act offended to act offended? Maybe I just have a hard time understanding their reasons for being offended.

[Crazy Hitch]

(((((steiner))))))

My mood swings make me touchy sometimes for no reason at all.

You're awesome Steiner.

[einsam]

There is such a thing as making mountains out of molehills and intruding in what's not your business, but there should also be a world in which people consider the feelings and welfare of those who aren't either themselves or someone close to them. Sometimes it's important to stand up for what's right even if it's not affecting you personally.

[Webgoji]

I think the best advice I ever received concerning something like this is:

Speak sparingly and only when necessary or you will make mistakes

You can't know why someone would be affected by something and to assume you do and then believe you are the victim when you offend someone is merely being being deluded.

Not saying you're feeling like the victim, just that we don't know other people's motivations so it's best just to keep our mouths shut.



... and fling poo.

You seem like a very rational person to me, Steiner. Some people react to the world more with their emotions than with rational thought. We're all different, and that can make it really hard to understand other people sometimes. Sometimes all you can do is observe and not really understand.

[Steiner of Thule]

Originally Posted by einsam

There is such a thing as making mountains out of molehills and intruding in what's not your business, but there should also be a world in which people consider the feelings and welfare of those who aren't either themselves or someone close to them. Sometimes it's important to stand up for what's right even if it's not affecting you personally.

So people like to appear righteous, even though they don't really care? I find it hard to see that people really care about the welfare of others unless they are close to them.

[ManOfConstantSorrow]

SoT what would someone have to say to offend you?

[Steiner of Thule]

Originally Posted by ManOfConstantSorrow

SoT what would someone have to say to offend you?

Not really sure to be honest. Maybe liars. Some things I find hard to put to words.

[Steiner of Thule]

Originally Posted by Steiner of Thule

Not really sure to be honest. Maybe liars. Some things I find hard to put to words.

I mean, it's difficult to understand what things piss me off. Usually when people talk about things. I don't really want to say.

You can stand by and watch someone being thrown under the bus, or you can warn them to watch out for the bus. Some want to sit back and enjoy the show. Everyone makes their own choice and lives with it.

I have caught myself getting offended in situations where in the past I was the 'offender'... so now I'm kind of touchy and hyper-vigilant of it- and critical of others. I think of the quote "Once you know better do better" but that doesn't necessarily mean to expect everyone else to 'do better' (or that others are even doing anything wrong). Sometimes someone will just skirt on an issue I'm sensitive about and I jump on them before thinking about their intentions. I'm just thinking of instances where I got kind of self- righetous toward someone and it was more about my past guilt than their present 'offense'. I hope that makes sense.

[shortandcute]

It's kind of in style right now for everyone to take offense over trivial things.

[Steiner of Thule]

Originally Posted by shortandcute

It's kind of in style right now for everyone to take offense over trivial things.

It seems to be that way. It's a way to make themselves appear more right by telling someone they're wrong.

Possible trigger:

If someone is frequently and easily offended or if they act a bit too offended over something most people might consider tasteless or crude but wouldn't consider offensive, then they might be seeking attention

[Steiner of Thule]

Originally Posted by George H.

Possible trigger:

If someone is frequently and easily offended or if they act a bit too offended over something most people might consider tasteless or crude but wouldn't consider offensive, then they might be seeking attention

Though why would they seek attention if I am talking to them. They already have my attention.

[The_little_didgee]

Originally Posted by shortandcute

It's kind of in style right now for everyone to take offense over trivial things.

I definitely agree with this.

Most people tend to see a situation from their perspective only. Some won't even consider the truth no matter what even if it is a genuine misunderstanding or mistake.

On Friday night after my craft group I waited for the bus inside the community centre because it was - 25 Celsius outside. When the bus arrived I went outside where there was a lady who approached me and accused me of being mean because I didn't let her into the closed community centre.

I was so confused and couldn't believe it. She never once came to the door to ask me to let her in. She obviously misinterpreted the situation but she didn't want to hear it.

Participants usually wait inside during the winter months. We are not supposed to do this because there is no front counter staff after 5:30 and the centre is technical closed. I was alone on Friday so I had no one to back me up. I do remember seeing a person standing outside who I thought was a man wearing a 3/4 length duffel coat. He appeared to be tolerating the cold just fine. I didn't think anything more about it, since other people not involved with the community centre have waited for the bus outside without any problem in - 20 degree temperatures. They never complained about us being mean for not letting them wait inside the closed community centre.

I asked the lady, "What is wrong with you?"

I don't read minds. If you want me to do something just ask. I'm reluctant to offer help unless it is clear a person needs my help. I always ask first, because I have learned it pisses people off if I don't.

Originally Posted by Steiner of Thule

Though why would they seek attention if I am talking to them. They already have my attention.

It may not be your attention they are seeking. And also it may be a form of manipulation.

[Steiner of Thule]

Originally Posted by The_little_didgee

I don't read minds. If you want me to do something just ask. I'm reluctant to offer help unless it is clear a person needs my help. I always ask first, because I have learned it pisses people off.

Yes, I prefer to wait for someone to come ask for help then to offer it because I feel like I am being an nuisance if I were to ask if they need any help. I'm not very good at reading faces so I can't really tell if someone is having trouble or not.

[Steiner of Thule]

Originally Posted by George H.

It may not be your attention they are seeking. And also it may be a form of manipulation.

Manipulating me to feel bad I suppose. Or trying to at least.

U cannot have BPD if u can't read faces lol
Further why bring this up when u don't want to mention what offends YOU? I'd be interested on what made u think of this and if I can help

[The_little_didgee]

Originally Posted by Steiner of Thule

Yes, I prefer to wait for someone to come ask for help then to offer it because I feel like I am being an nuisance if I were to ask if they need any help. I'm not very good at reading faces so I can't really tell if someone is having trouble or not.

I have a lot of problems with nonverbal communication so I take the safe approach. I've been yelled at too much.

Steiner do you have ASD? I can relate to a lot of your people problem threads.

[Steiner of Thule]

Originally Posted by April72

U cannot have BPD if u can't read faces lol
Further why bring this up when u don't want to mention what offends YOU? I'd be interested on what made u think of this and if I can help

I don't have BPD. I know like to sit in BPD chat sometimes though.

[Steiner of Thule]

Originally Posted by The_little_didgee

I have a lot of problems with nonverbal communication so I take the safe approach. I've been yelled at too much.

Steiner do you have ASD? I can relate to a lot of your people problem threads.

Not diagnosed no. Most doctors ask me if I have that. How does on go about getting diagnosed with that. Either way it's probably too high functioning or something.

[eskielover]

People getting offended at everything is where all the politically correct crap has come from & labeling people things that they aren't if they even disagree with them or don't hold the same point of view. Those are the things that bother me about this overly offended way that society has become.

Personally nothing really offends me because in reality, I grew up with parents who didn't agree with me & I didn't agree with them. My mother always got offended & one had to walk on egg shells around her.....I finally didn't bother.

I think it's important to be diplomatic & sensitive about the way we interface with people....I don't think the politically correct crap is right.....in reality, it doesn't solve anything, it just ends up flinging politically correct names at people which does bother me, but I don't get offended as I just chalk it up to where it's coming from.

[connect.the.stars]

Quite an entertaining comedy video with insight. I present to you "Easily Butthurt People" by Ryan Higa ^_^ Link below.

***Warning: Some usage of sexual innuendos***
***Caution: May be triggering***
***Not recommended for easily offended people***

Possible trigger:

Ryan Higa: "And the thing is I don't think these people are actually offended half the time. I think they believe it's supposed to offend them, so they act that way, but really it doesn't even bother them. Or maybe people say these things just so people agree with them."