[LiteraryLark]

Brace yourselves...winter is coming! That means cold and rain...and I HATE the cold and the rain. I hate smoking my cigs in the cold and rain like a dog, and then get yelled at because I stink.

Last week I got an Ecig and I absolutely love it. I promised myself this will be a winter thing, rather than promising to quit smoking for good.

The problem is my mom doesn't want any smoking in the house.

Ahem....this is where I have the problem.

She wants me to quit smoking, but she doesn't want me to smoke the Ecig in the house.

I've tried (and begged) a number of times that Ecigs are different than cigarettes, that it smells good, and that it won't stick to the house.

Right now I sneak it while they're not at home, but I have two propositions.

One, which my mom is against, to let me smoke it in my room. She just doesn't want to smell it....but guess what....I smoke my cigs in the backyard, sometimes right by the door if it rains...then I open the door, a rush of cigarette smoke comes pouring in, I febreeze the hallway, then the whole house smells like febreeze. Then I go and sit down, and I still smell like smoke and my mom tells me to spray myself.

UGH!!!! If I smoke my ecig, I won't walk around the whole house smelling like smoke, I won't bring in the whole cloud of cigarette smoke when I walk in through the door, and if the door to my room is closed, she won't be able to tell the difference that I am smoking. Because I have snuck the ecig in my room while she is home, and she's never been able to tell. And while she is not home I've walked through the whole house, smoking my ecig, and you CANNOT TELL THE DIFFERENCE!

Here is option two, which may be the most convincing, if she will allow me to smoke my E-Cig in the garage. This may be the winner. Yes, the garage can be freezing, but when it is raining I can bundle up and at least stay dry and get my nic fix without stinking up the whole house, and the garage is large enough where I can billow out smoke and not have it be an issue where the whole garage stinks.

But here's the kicker...my mom doesn't want to smell it, PERIOD. And yet, she forces me to smoke outside in the cold and rain, open the door and the whole smoke cloud follows me, febreeze up the whole house, and when I sit down my mom tells me to spray myself. Don't get me wrong, she loves the idea of the ecig because I don't smell...but she doesn't want to smell the ecig!

I can't get her to understand that A) the ecig has a light fragrance, way better than stinking the house up with smoke and febreeze, B) it won't ruin the house because it is water vapor, and C) allllll of the health benefits of switching to the e-cig (and those who say ecigs are worse are funded by tobacco companies)

So I can understand her not wanting me smoke in my room, because that is still part of "smoking in the house" and I can respect that...but the garage? The garage is perfect for smoking my ecig! It's dry and relatively warmer than smoking outside, and when I open the door the house won't stink of tobacco and febreeze. I doubt it will stink at all, because I won't be smoking right by the door, I'll be smoking out in the center, and we have two doorways leading to the garage. We have the door to the garage, and the laundry room, and then my parents room is next to the laundry room. So technically, when I come through the door, I will have to go through the laundry room, which we keep closed, so technically, we have two rooms to get through the house, so it's less likely for the smoke to come through.

Any idea how to convince my mom to at least let me smoke in the garage? I was thinking of writing her a nice letter summing up the points I've made her, and then promising that this will be a "rainy day thing", meaning when it's nice out I'll smoke outside, but when it's raining I can smoke in the garage.

[BlueEyedMama]

I think that the garage sounds like a decent plan. Good luck talking to your Mom.

[notz]

Not to sound flippant, but it would all be a moot point if you just didn't smoke! Freedom from nicotine is highly empowering. Cheers to when you do stop! For me, it's been 18.10 years and I will never ingest nicotine again (or those ecig substitute chemicals).

[LiteraryLark]

Originally Posted by notz

Not to sound flippant, but it would all be a moot point if you just didn't smoke! Freedom from nicotine is highly empowering. Cheers to when you do stop! For me, it's been 18.10 years and I will never ingest nicotine again (or those ecig substitute chemicals).

Uh, yeah. That's not going to happen.

[~Christina]

My stepson has a E cig .

To be honest I do not want that shyyt in my house, there is a huge lack of studies about long term effect of e cigs on the vaper and those getting it second hand.

He got hooked on fruit flavors. Sure it's better than disgusting smoke, my husband and I do not want it in our home.

So yes he's outside getting his fix in 90 degree weather or -2 .

I think your garage is a good plan.

Good luck

[Steiner of Thule]

Smoke outside and stop trying to sneak cigs in the house while they are away. Also the weather can't be that bad there. It's California.

Garage with the door open would be the ideal solution but otherwise keep it outside.

[notz]

Originally Posted by LiteraryLark

Uh, yeah. That's not going to happen.

Why not?

[LiteraryLark]

Originally Posted by notz

Why not?

I can't quit.

[notz]

Maybe not today but is it something you could perhaps entertain for another time?

[LiteraryLark]

Originally Posted by notz

Maybe not today but is it something you could perhaps entertain for another time?

Someday. Not now.

[notz]

Ok, fair enough. I hope you'll think about it and plan strategy for doing it someday!

I have a few points here that are likely to ruffle your feathers.

This is a case of 'my house my rules'. If you are paying rent on the otherhand I believe you would have the right to vape in your room only.

Just because this is an ecigarette doesn't mean there is no byproduct. They do produce a very irritating 'smoke'. It is unfair to expect others to have to inhale this too (I find it rather disgusting). They have flavours and odors of which it is also unfair to expect people to put up with (again, rather revolting).

In the end, this is mom's home and that should be respected. If she is willing to concede over the garage that should suffice.

Finally, if you don't want to smoke outside, perhaps making an effort to quit all together is the best bet. It is not the responsibility of others to accomodate you. In fact, in this case it is the other way around.

[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

My stepson has a E cig .

To be honest I do not want that shyyt in my house, there is a huge lack of studies about long term effect of e cigs on the vaper and those getting it second hand.

He got hooked on fruit flavors. Sure it's better than disgusting smoke, my husband and I do not want it in our home.

So yes he's outside getting his fix in 90 degree weather or -2 .

I think your garage is a good plan.

Good luck

So true. I quit smoking cigarettes and now cannot imagine breathing any foreign substance into my lungs. People should remember how long smokers were killing themselves with tobacco before it was declared harmful to one's health.

[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by notz

Ok, fair enough. I hope you'll think about it and plan strategy for doing it someday!

Thanks for being so encouraging without judgment. I will be quit two years this February, 2017.

Best of luck to LL whatever she decides to do.

[DechanDawa]

LL, I will admit I don't know anyone who vapes and have not been exposed to it so I really don't much know about it. Does the vape cloud linger? I mean, if you can smell it than I guess you could breathe it second-hand? I just don't know. It sounds like the garage is going to be your best compromise. If you lived where I do you might give it up as it gets so freezing to the point where being a smoker and having to go outside to smoke is suicide. Even an unheated garage would be horrible.

I will be smoke free two years this February. My tolerance for cigarette smoke is now zero. I will admit that the first six months I didn't mind the smell and even craved smelling secondhand smoked. But after I quit all forms of nicotine (patches, gum) this basic intolerance set it. I didn't even consider vaping as I heard from somewhere that the devices can explode! Yikes!

I even got into a big fight with a neighbor who smoked on her porch. It is really hard to believe that this is me now --- as I smoked on and off for decades. I now feel poisoned by it --- even a whiff of smoke. If I am in a store and a smoker walks by me the smell of smoke on them is unbelievably strong and actually makes me sick. I think when I smoked I didn't have any sense of smell. How else can I explain this? I had no idea non-smokers were experiencing me this way. I never thought I smelled like smoke. Such delusion!

I recently moved to an apartment complex where no smoking or vaping is allowed anywhere on the grounds including inside apartments and on porches and balconies. That's pretty strict but they really enforce it. So that's the future I guess...the no smoking zones are going to get bigger and bigger. I love living in a completely smoke free zone. It is very spoiling. Also, this would not have been possible if I had not quit for good...which now seems like a miracle.

[IchbinkeinTeufel]

I consider it common courtesy (and a sign of respect, since it's their home) to not smoke in a non-smoker's house, plus it shows you don't want to potentially put their lives or health at risk.

I wouldn't allow anyone to smoke in my home, ecig or not. I think it's great they're even okay with you smoking on the property; I doubt I would be. I agree with everything Notz said, as well.

I hope you guys can settle on something, and I further hope you some day manage to quit.

I will be quit two years this February, 2017.

Well done, DechanDawa! I'm so pleased to read that you found your way to a healthier self. I think my dad feels very relieved to have quit as well, but he seems a lot more resistant to the smell than I. I've never smoked (thankfully) but I have such a strong dislike for it... I'd go so far as to say I abhor it.

[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by IchbinkeinTeufel

I consider it common courtesy (and a sign of respect, since it's their home) to not smoke in a non-smoker's house, plus it shows you don't want to potentially put their lives or health at risk.

I wouldn't allow anyone to smoke in my home, ecig or not. I think it's great they're even okay with you smoking on the property; I doubt I would be. I agree with everything Notz said, as well.

I hope you guys can settle on something, and I further hope you some day manage to quit.

Well done, DechanDawa! I'm so pleased to read that you found your way to a healthier self. I think my dad feels very relieved to have quit as well, but he seems a lot more resistant to the smell than I. I've never smoked (thankfully) but I have such a strong dislike for it... I'd go so far as to say I abhor it.

Thank you. I would like to say that to be addicted to smoking is awful because regular cigarettes are now more addictive than ever, having over 2,000 chemicals in them. Maybe that is why vapers also seem to continue to smoke regular cigarettes in addition to vaping. In the years before I quit for good I tried and failed dozens of times. Dozens!!! It was the nicotine. Now vapers will tell you it is okay to get nicotine through vaping because the harmful regular smoke is removed. Well, these people have not done their research. Nicotine itself has been found to be carcinogenic. It is poison. It wouldn't take too much of a concentrated dose to outright kill someone. I had the idea I would stay on the nic patch forever because I thought nicotine was not harmful but this is simply not true. Coming off nicotine threw me into panic attacks, anxiety, and depression. I couldn't sleep, was emotional, and overwrought all the time. In fact, coming on two years I am probably just now getting balanced. Personally I think there should be rehab programs for people who want off of nicotine. So with regards to LL's dilemma we need to realize that being judgmental and critical of her wanting to find a way to smoke in her mother's house is not helpful. Okay, LL has to realize that smoking outside or in the garage is probably the best compromise. It sounds like her mother doesn't like it but is tolerant as long as LL meets her halfway. But LL also needs to realize that for nonsmokers to say that smoke smells abhorrent is to me actually a very mild description! I can smell cigarette smoke a block away and even a whiff of it drives me crazy like I am being poisoned. I don't know why LL says she will never quit. Never say never is my motto.

[IchbinkeinTeufel]

I agree with you, DechanDawa. If my message came off as particularly critical, ...

[LiteraryLark]

You can't make judgments on something you know nothing about.

All the bad notions on ecigs are funded by tobacco companies to keep people smoking cigarettes.

Some say ecigs can cause bronchitis. So can cigarettes, and the vapor from the ecig cleanses your lungs so you can breathe easier.

Some say ecigs are worse than cigarettes, but cigarettes have more than 2000 additives and toxins intended to keep you addicted for life, while ecigs are comprised of nicotine and a small number of chemicals to create flavor...AND it is used to QUIT smoking.

My friends have told me I smell wonderful after smoking the e-cig, and it does not cause any damage to the house or car. I can smoke freely in my car all day with the windows rolled up, step outside, then step back in and you would never tell I had smoked.

In fact, burning incense does more damage than an e-cig would, because incense has the same smoke as cigarettes that stains the walls with the smell, and the smell of burning incense would last for hours. E cigs do not stain walls or cause damage to the house whatsoever, and the smell does not linger at all. I can puff on it all day and no one would know I was smoking.

I have my reasons to smoke an ecig, the number one being is I am treated so cruelly by EVERYONE while smoking cigarettes, and yet here I am now, trying to make a compromise with my mom just to stay out of the cold and rain, and I am being dogged and criticized for it.

[MiddayNap]

I'm sure this isn't the response one would like, but it is my opinion that you should respect your mother's wishes. Although smoking in the garage seems like a good compromise, in all honesty. I suspect she may be making it more difficult for you to smoke the e-cig as a sort of passive-aggressive push to get you to stop smoking. That's just a hunch, however.

[DechanDawa]

Oh well, no one can force someone to stop smoking or vaping. I don't really know about vaping but I do know about smoking. I had to stop because I wanted it.

I don't know if vaping is a good step towards becoming a non-smoker. I think for some it must be. Do people eventually stop vaping after quitting smoking altogether? I don't know the answers...

LL, how do you know this information about vaping is correct? That tobacco companies are spreading the bad word? Maybe this is true. I don't know. But surely there must be clinical studies. And common sense says that breathing weird stuff into the lungs is an irritation, and irritation is the beginning of what might cause cancer down the line.

However, I also think more compassion is needed. Hey, I tried dozens of times to quit smoking. I kept failing and failing. It was so horrible, and such a lonely journey. What helped me was online quit smoking communities. I needed the kind of support such as is offered in AA meetings. Quitting is so very, very hard. It is so painful. Sometimes smokers ask me how I quit. I tell them they have to accept it is going to be harder than they could imagine. That's the reality.

Non-smokers simply can't imagine the strength of this addiction. Nicotine has the ability to morph into what the user needs. If the user needs to be relaxed, nicotine will to that. If the user needs to be alert, the nicotine can act to promote clarity. If it weren't poison nicotine would be medicine. But as of yet it is not known how to purify it.

LL, I really feel for you.

The jury is out regarding health benefits/detractors. In fact, there is a law moving quickly through the process in Canada right now to ban vaping altogether.

Until that time many of the provinces have enacted their own rules about age requirements and disallowing vaping anywhere indoors, around minors, in cars, and in public places.

I am also wondering about your definition of cold; you're in Caliifornia for goodness sakes.

[DechanDawa]

There is a rainy cold season in winter in many parts of California. I lived in southern California and even there we had a cold and rainy season. Sure it is relative. It isn't like ice and snow. But it is very uncomfortable to stand out in heavy rain. I used to smoke outside there. I remember once it was raining really hard. I had a raincoat on but still got soaked. Also, cigarettes would literally fall apart and melt away from getting soaking wet. Nasty business. Nasty nasty.

I am happy I didn't consider vaping when I quit. I definitely think it would have led me back to smoking. I read somewhere about vaping devices exploding and that was it for me. Yikes. No thanks.

Bad news for vapers if vaping gets banned...but it makes sense that nonsmokers see it as smoking. Both smoking and vaping are banned in my apartment complex.

[Apokolips]

To everyone who says they know nothing about vaping but then go on to try and say that it's horrible and dangerous please educate yourselves. The vapor produced from these devices is 95% less harmful than tobacco smoke. You also consume nicotine every time you eat a tomato or an eggplant. Yes the batteries can explode but so can your cell phone battery. Hell the new note phones are not banned on planes. 95% of battery failures are due to user error like carrying uncased batteries in a pocket with keys or change or is using the batteries with no concern for their limits. It's easy to set out on a witch hunt when it comes to a new concept, especially one that has so much false information being spread as fact. The FDA gets kickbacks and tax revenue from big tobacco. That is a fact. Of course, any studies funded by the FDA are going to be skewed thanks to the large amount of money coming in from smoking. Read studies done by groups that have nothing to do with the crooked FDA and you'll see them singing a totally different tune. Case in point is this right here. https://www.rcplondon.ac.uk/news/pro...new-rcp-report If you don't smoke that's great more power to you, just please stop bashing an industry you know nothing about and please stop harping on us smokers to quit. We know it's dangerous but guess what? It is our decision on what we put into our bodies. Tobacco addiction is more difficult to overcome than heroin, especially when you have a mental illness. Please show a little bit of respect and compassion for those of us who are not able to quit yet.