Hi! I'm not quite sure where to put this. I don't require a solution. I just need to vent. The whole thing was appalling. Perhaps you yourselves have similarly struggled with the embarrassing actions of others.

I am writing this on account I was embarrassed and frustrated yesterday by my fellow guests. Their behaviour just seemed to be highly disrespectful.

I had the wonderful opportunity to attend a First Nations event. I was so very honoured. I've been before so thankfully I was aware of the protocol. And, as with attending any cultural or spiritual ceremony I was extremely respectful.

To my horror however, other guests treated this important occasion as entertainment. They took pictures, they laughed, they talked through the ceremony, they used their cellphones. When asked to participate in the ceremony (ie. smudging themselves) they laughed and cajoled one another as they did so.

I was absolutely mortified by this behaviour. I was embarrassed.

I'm sure these people would be irate if someone behaved this way in their own place of worship.

[MariaTheFictionkin]

Oh god, I hate when people do that. I remember back in college there was a Christian group having a get together outside playing music and singing and I remember walking by some people and they started making fun of the Christian group. By mocking their singing and making fowl comments about their beliefs. I may not be a Christian or really part of any religious faith but I still found it extremely rude.

[baboo5]

Some people are very narrow-minded.

I live in a small, rural area and there is a lot of that around here. Especially people that never left the area and don't realize what a big, diverse world we live in.

[eskielover]

It is VERY sad that people have NEVER BEEN TAUGHT how to behave in situations like that.

It seems proper etiquette has been thrown out the window & left the door open to "act like you want....it shouldn't matter to anyone else....behavior is all relative to one's own choices."

Growing up I went to some services more as an observer. Watching quietly & respectfully even without participating when I didn't feel it would be appropriate to do so, still showed respect for those who were participating.

Sadly we see this behavior throughout today's society....it's like for many if they don't agree with what is going on, being disruptive has become the current behavior norm against those who differ from their beliefs & values.

I know our generation was respectful of others.....not exactly sure where the behavioral teachings have come from in today's society that have created this kind of behavior in some people. It is sad. Glad there are still those who respect others.

I see this everywhere I go...adults acting like wild animals instead of humans. I'm embarrassed to even be in public with some of the people from the day center I go to so I can imagine that is how they would act at a religious ceremony too. As I've said it starts in childhood-they have to be taught to be respectful then because by the time they become grown it's too late.

I have a very difficult time being around people like the ones you described in any situation.

[Krow]

I see. What an awful shame. Perhaps in future events the same disrespect shall not recur -- one can hope.

That is truly horrible behavior, from those people, I agree.

Thank you.

I've had a few days to stew about this. I realise now that the actions of the majority did not reflect on me. I have thought back to the fact that while many behaved abominably not everyone present did so. I can't control the actions of others and I need to learn to not allow my anxiety to be triggered by them. Basically I need to concentrate on me, myself, and I. Right?

Yes, their actions are definitely not a reflection of you, so never take inward other people's behavior. Never take ownership of it and I think that will help decrease your anxiety. I still have to practice that mindfulness when other people's actions irritate me.

For example, my cousin offered to help me with a creative project, but then has been sending me emails telling me that he's too busy and will catch up with me months from now about my creative project. So, I was honest and told him that his behavior upset me and told him why. And do you know what his response was? To further lie about why he's so busy. Like, I don't need to know all the minutia of your busy life. I have a busy life, but I prioritize the people and activities in my life, that are important to me. I am still fuming mad at him, but I decided not to respond to his dumb email because when a person blows you off, its best to just ignore them and move forward. Sorry for the tangent.

I think it's fine to react with anger when other people act disrespectful, especially at a public event like the one you attended. Sometimes, I have been to those kinds of events, and have walked up to complete strangers to admonish them for acting disrespectful (not being quiet during a speech, or a ceremony), and like you described, laughing at inappropriate times, etc. Other times, I just let it go. It all depends.

[eskielover]

For example, my cousin offered to help me with a creative project, but then has been sending me emails telling me that he's too busy and will catch up with me months from now

sometimes I think people offer NEVER expecting us to take them up on their offer when it really comes down to it. Lived with that my whole life so I was REALLY SHOCKED when people actually showed up to fulfill their offers in my new home town....& these were people I never knew before moving here.

Some people just seem to be more in touch with appropriate behavior & caring than others.

[Unrigged64072835]

I'd be upset too. That's like yelling profanity in a church service. Or taking selfies.