[Fresia]

My Dad has stage 4 cancer. He has moved out of state to be near his grand kids, my niece and nephew. I am taking care of his house and getting it ready for sale. One the big things for that was replacing the floors. The carpets were 20+ years old. You can imagine the shape they are in.

We know hardwoods or engineered hardwoods are popular for resale, plus he has always wanted them but has never gotten around to it. I have made arrangements to have this done but it is a slow process. The floors were just delivered. It takes 2-3 weeks to acclimate to the space. The contractors have scheduled to come in the week of Aug 7th-12th. It is a big complicated job because the house is post and beam, nothing normal about it. The contractor is even supposed to come back out to take a look at something discovered, no subfloor to nail into, so they may have to add that. That is more time, and money, if so. It may also affect the door clearance and they will have to be trimmed on the bottom so the doors can be moved.

Dad has since decided to surprise me for my birthday and is coming the weekend of the 18th-20th. We are going to try to make this happen given his health and this will probably be his last trip out. The whole family is now coming plus a boyfriend of my niece. This will be our last get-together in this house that we love but a full house of people.

My concern is that assuming things go on time, go well, it will give me less than a week to put the house back together, which is tight given that I have a full work week that week. If it does not go on time and is delayed as I know a lot of construction is, it might be better off waiting. However, it would be nice to have this done for him when he comes. I'm just not sure if this is wise and better off making sure there are places to sleep and such, and perhaps it is better to leave the house as is the way everyone remembers it. I do wish I was on one of those home shows that things are done in a matter of days.

What do you think:

Risk it that things will go as planned and to make it happen some how, surprise him?

Play it safe, wait, and have less stress?

[lizardlady]

Will everyone be staying at his house when then come? It could turn into a nightmare if the construction is not done and they are in the house.

Do you trust the people doing the work enough to tell them the situation and ask if they can realistically have the job done in time?

If the contractor can have the job done in time, is there anyone who can help you put the house back together? Or can you pay someone to help put it back?

I'm just full of questions, aren't I?

Maybe it would be best to wait until after your dad's visit to have the work done. He's coming for your birthday. In your shoes, I'd rather have memories of spending time with him, than memories of the stress of trying to get everything done.

[Fresia]

Everyone will be staying at the house.

I selected and paid for the material months ago. The way the contractor drug their feet at getting to the point of even getting the materials here is what makes me hesitant as to whether it will be done on time. I've not worked with them before so I just don't know. Those tv shows I know are a misconception that things can be done in days, if only.

It would be really nice to have it done but the more I think about it, the more I am thinking realistically, the movers are booking weeks out. How will I know the contractors will definitely be done to have the movers put things back, let alone get the little things like lamps, make the beds, and other things put in place. (?)! I don't want to be stuck with a disaster for their vacation having to put the family to work, helping to put things back.

You bring up a really good point, I don't want to be exhausted when they are here. I have a hard enough time keeping up with my nephew even when rested. I wish I could bottle up that energy that he has in a pill and take it, then it would get done in no time; if I could do that, I probably could even get the floors done and the move all by myself, little stinker.

It makes me sad to think that he won't see it in person. Perhaps I can take pics or video it for him when it is done instead.

[healingme4me]

sorry to hear about your dad's health.

I do feel it will be great for all of you to be together, as family.

If you are not fully ready with the house put all back together after the contractors finish, will everyone be understanding? Will anyone be able to pitch in and lend a hand? Is spending time outside on a patio or in a backyard possible? More BBQ and less inside the kitchen?

Fingers crossed.

[Travelinglady]

So sorry about your dad. Could you hire folks to help you put the house back together--or get volunteers?

[lizardlady]

Originally Posted by Fresia

I wish I could bottle up that energy that he has in a pill and take it,

I've wished for the same thing. I think it's called cocaine!

Fresia, even if you wait to have the floors done after everyone visits your dad still might get to see the finished floors in the future. Stage 4 is not good, but you know that. On the other hand I had a friend with Stage 4 lung cancer who hung on for four years after her diagnosis.

[Fresia]

Originally Posted by lizardlady

I've wished for the same thing. I think it's called cocaine!

Fresia, even if you wait to have the floors done after everyone visits your dad still might get to see the finished floors in the future. Stage 4 is not good, but you know that. On the other hand I had a friend with Stage 4 lung cancer who hung on for four years after her diagnosis.

coke,
a coke and a smile.

I just talked to my brother last night. He has taken a significant turn. My brother is not even sure they will make it for August now but he will find out more from DAd if it really is about surprising me or about coming home. If it is surprising me to see me, then I will fly out there. If it is about coming home, we will find a way to make that happen.

I'll get in touch with the contractors to see whether they can make the floors happen in time. As much as he wanted them, they may have to wait. I can't have him walking around a maze or without furniture if he's gotten so very weak.

[Fresia]

Originally Posted by healingme4me

sorry to hear about your dad's health.

I do feel it will be great for all of you to be together, as family.

If you are not fully ready with the house put all back together after the contractors finish, will everyone be understanding? Will anyone be able to pitch in and lend a hand? Is spending time outside on a patio or in a backyard possible? More BBQ and less inside the kitchen?

Fingers crossed.

Thank you for the well wishes and insight.

They probably would help; it is just with them here so short a time, I hate for them to have to help for their brief vacation. I know if it was me, I would be glad to help but I hate to do that to them. It would be lovely just to be able to concentrate on spending time together so I'm thinking the floors can wait. I'll talk to the contractors today to get more answers from them before rescheduling.

[Fresia]

Originally Posted by Travelinglady

So sorry about your dad. Could you hire folks to help you put the house back together--or get volunteers?

Movers and volunteers are a great ideas, thank you!

[possum220]

Life is what happens when we are busy making plans. There are times when our priorities get made for us.

What is your gut telling you?

[lizardlady]

Originally Posted by possum220

Life is what happens when we are busy making plans. There are times when our priorities get made for us.

What is your gut telling you?

Excellent point Possum!

Fresia, given your Dad's recent turn I'd go with my gut like Possum said.

I'm so sorry you, your dad and your family are dealing with his diagnosis.