what would you tell your 15 year old self?

lizardlady · Mar 06, 2019 at 07:24 PM

I heard an interview this afternoon. The interviewer asked the person "what would you tell your 15 year old self?"

It got me thinking what I would tell her. That was in the middle of a particularly dark period of my life. I was living in a home with an abusive, alcoholic father and a co-dependent mother who acted as if nothing was wrong. One week after my father threw my older brother out of the house he (brother) was killed in an accident.

If I could talk to that depressed stressed out kid I'd tell her to hang in there, that it will get better. My father used to tell me to enjoy my teen years because they would be the best of my life. I'd think "then just kill me now." I'd tell the 15 year old he was lying through his effing teeth, that better years were ahead. That, eventually, I'd have a good life.

So, what would you tell the younger you?

Nammu · Mar 06, 2019 at 07:58 PM

Don't play it so safe, take risks and join social activities.

cloudymind · Mar 06, 2019 at 08:09 PM

I made a lot of mistakes trying to please and impress people just to have them by my side. This is what I would like to tell my 15-year-old self:

"Embrace your identity. Love your passion. Don't ever forget who you are and what you want to be just because you want to fit in. It's alright to compromise but not to the extent that you lose yourself. Do what you always love like drawing. Your future self will thank you for that. Stop treating anyone with food and stuff just to please them. It's good to be generous but some people will take advantage of your kindness and use you to get what they want. Save the money, it's not worth it because they will leave you as soon as you graduate and part ways."

Skeezyks · Mar 06, 2019 at 08:09 PM

End it now while there's still time...

lizardlady · Mar 06, 2019 at 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skeezyks

End it now while there's still time...

But then we would have missed getting to know you. I would feel badly about that.

CepheidVariable · Mar 06, 2019 at 08:47 PM

I've thought about this question before....

It didn't get better.

I was already aware of the major philosophies, world-views, and wisdom. I tried to deal with my troubles in an intelligent, compassionate and self-aware fashion.

I'm not sure anything I could say would change how I felt deep down. Some things just have to be lived.

saidso · Mar 17, 2019 at 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skeezyks

End it now while there's still time...

Yeah, I'm the same Skeezyks. I was too scared, because I thought that I might be injured rather than killed - and I already knew from the abuse how long it takes to die.

I don't hate my life, but I wouldn't live through the years 8 to 18 again whatever the alternative might be. More horrible than I can allow myself to remember.

Row Jimmy · Mar 06, 2019 at 10:10 PM

Be a doctor or go into the Marine Corps even though your parents are against it.

LiteraryLark · Mar 06, 2019 at 10:42 PM

SAVE your money!

NEVER smoke cigarettes!

LIVE for today

LET GO of your past.

EMBRACE your inner beauty

BE WARY of the true intentions of others

BEFRIEND those who love you for you

TAKE that high school "college preparedness" course

THINK before you speak

CHALLENGE yourself

BRUSH YOUR DAMN TEETH TWICE A DAY AND FLOSS! :P

EAT nutritiously

EXERCISE regularly

LAUGH often

CHERISH your time

YOU are beautiful

YOU are loved

LOVE YOURSELF

sarahsweets · Mar 06, 2019 at 10:43 PM

"Girl, slow your roll"

Travelinglady · Mar 07, 2019 at 12:14 AM

Go into therapy as soon as you can. Your family is not normal and you have gotten messed up as a result. You will be okay. Hang in there in the meantime.

Gasplessy · May 08, 2020 at 03:46 PM

Please keep calm, don't rush. Just remember to be respectful.
You will find your way

possum220 · May 08, 2020 at 09:14 PM

You will be alive decades from now.

Gasplessy · May 13, 2020 at 10:46 AM

You're right but have to deal with it. I'm sorry
Try to be good

stayingafloat · Mar 07, 2019 at 03:47 AM

"Don't keep to yourself"

"Seek professional help asap"

TishaBuv · Mar 07, 2019 at 04:14 AM

Buy Apple.

Anything else I’d like to go back and change, would leave me without my children existing today.

eskielover · Mar 07, 2019 at 09:18 AM

Your parents do actually have problems & your fighting with them is a normal response to their behaviors.....& be aware....their problems have nothing to do with lack of education to don't equate an education with solving all those issues.....so don't marry someone thinking their education will keep them from being like your dad.

Yep get your education & become your own person. And OH YES, that wondering whether "this" is all that anyone feels in a relationship is on the right track because emotional connection was missing all around you....so your gut feeling was right on.

WishfulThinker66 · Mar 07, 2019 at 09:53 AM

I was emotionally unhealthy even then. I would tell myself don't wait 30 years - get help NOW! I would tell myself to talk to my guidance counselor about the dysfunction at home, my mother's abuse, the bullying, and the debilitating anxiety and depression. Please please please I would plead with myself to speak up and ask for help.

IrisBloom · Mar 07, 2019 at 10:33 AM

I'd tell myself "you're going to go through some very traumatic things, but you will survive. You will be a stronger person as a result and you will not lose your passion."

Taylor27 · Mar 07, 2019 at 11:18 AM

I can trust the counsellor at the school instead of acting out and getting into trouble. Things at home are so unsafe i deserve to get help

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Nammu Crone Member Since May 2010 Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system. Posts: 71,948 (SuperPoster!) 14 54k hugs given	Mar 06, 2019 at 07:58 PM #2 Don't play it so safe, take risks and join social activities. __________________ *Nammu* …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann
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Skeezyks Disreputable Old Troll Member Since Oct 2015 Location: The Star of the North Posts: 32,762 (SuperPoster!) 8 17.4k hugs given	Mar 06, 2019 at 08:09 PM #4 End it now while there's still time... __________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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CepheidVariable Stardust Member Since Jun 2017 Location: rural Canada Posts: 2,075 7 2,472 hugs given	Mar 06, 2019 at 08:47 PM #6 I've thought about this question before.... It didn't get better. I was already aware of the major philosophies, world-views, and wisdom. I tried to deal with my troubles in an intelligent, compassionate and self-aware fashion. I'm not sure anything I could say would change how I felt deep down. Some things just have to be lived.
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Row Jimmy Poohbah Member Since Apr 2015 Location: Protest. Posts: 1,337 9 400 hugs given	Mar 06, 2019 at 10:10 PM #8 Be a doctor or go into the Marine Corps even though your parents are against it.
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sarahsweets Threadtastic Postaholic Member Since Dec 2018 Location: New Jersey Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!) 5 192 hugs given	Mar 06, 2019 at 10:43 PM #10 "Girl, slow your roll" __________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society.
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Travelinglady Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Sep 2010 Location: North Carolina Posts: 48,305 (SuperPoster!) 13 23k hugs given	Mar 07, 2019 at 12:14 AM #11 Go into therapy as soon as you can. Your family is not normal and you have gotten messed up as a result. You will be okay. Hang in there in the meantime.
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Gasplessy Member Member Since Oct 2016 Location: Europe Posts: 413 7 566 hugs given	May 08, 2020 at 03:46 PM #12 Please keep calm, don't rush. Just remember to be respectful. You will find your way
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possum220 Legendary Member Since Jan 2009 Location: Uppa Gumtree West Posts: 19,397 (SuperPoster!) 15 7,984 hugs given	May 08, 2020 at 09:14 PM #13 You will be alive decades from now.
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Gasplessy Member Member Since Oct 2016 Location: Europe Posts: 413 7 566 hugs given	May 13, 2020 at 10:46 AM #14 You're right but have to deal with it. I'm sorry Try to be good
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stayingafloat Member Member Since Oct 2014 Location: - Posts: 217 9 127 hugs given	Mar 07, 2019 at 03:47 AM #15 "Don't keep to yourself" "Seek professional help asap"
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TishaBuv Legendary Member Since Dec 2014 Location: USA Posts: 10,258 (SuperPoster!) 9 1,879 hugs given	Mar 07, 2019 at 04:14 AM #16 Buy Apple. Anything else I’d like to go back and change, would leave me without my children existing today. __________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T
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WishfulThinker66 Magnate Member Since Jun 2018 Location: Canada Posts: 2,285 5 117 hugs given	Mar 07, 2019 at 09:53 AM #18 I was emotionally unhealthy even then. I would tell myself don't wait 30 years - get help NOW! I would tell myself to talk to my guidance counselor about the dysfunction at home, my mother's abuse, the bullying, and the debilitating anxiety and depression. Please please please I would plead with myself to speak up and ask for help.
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IrisBloom Living Entity Member Since Jul 2014 Location: La La Land Posts: 28,949 (SuperPoster!) 9 2,365 hugs given	Mar 07, 2019 at 10:33 AM #19 I'd tell myself "you're going to go through some very traumatic things, but you will survive. You will be a stronger person as a result and you will not lose your passion." __________________
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Taylor27 healing from trauma Member Since Dec 2017 Location: Alberta Posts: 30,435 (SuperPoster!) 6 24.3k hugs given	Mar 07, 2019 at 11:18 AM #20 I can trust the counsellor at the school instead of acting out and getting into trouble. Things at home are so unsafe i deserve to get help
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