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LiteraryLark
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Lightbulb Dec 24, 2021 at 06:10 PM
  #1
My New Year's Resolution is to live life like royalty and be as worthy as a Queen which means to...

--dress like royalty
--carry myself like royalty
--be as confident as a Queen
--be treated like a Queen, especially by romantic partners
--and follow the four steps of becoming a "full-fledged Queen" a la To Wong Foo which are:

May good thoughts be your sword and shield
Ignore Adversity
Abide by the rules of love
Larger than life is just the right size

...Essentially, I am doing this because I want to enter my 30s a more confident and beautiful version of myself inside and out, and a Queen is all that and more. A Queen is kind, caring, empathetic, noble, resilient which are all things I already am...but I find myself unattractive, I have low self-confidence, and I also dwell on negativity, but a Queen sees herself as beautiful and confident, optimistic and hopeful.

Last year, my New Year's Resolution was to practice self-care every day, and I truly excelled in that resolution...but it only did so much with my confidence. So this year to further my quest in becoming a Queen, one goal is to lose 65 pounds. I lost 35 pounds this year, which is terrific, but I still have alot more to lose.

Last edited by LiteraryLark; Dec 24, 2021 at 06:41 PM..
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Default Dec 24, 2021 at 06:32 PM
  #2
I really just want to get rid of these last 25-30 pounds and build muscle. I know everything is in my control and all I have to do is just put down the fork and eat less and move around but its been tough since Thanksgiving for some reason.
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LiteraryLark
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Default Dec 24, 2021 at 06:53 PM
  #3
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Originally Posted by Mountaindewed View Post
I really just want to get rid of these last 25-30 pounds and build muscle. I know everything is in my control and all I have to do is just put down the fork and eat less and move around but its been tough since Thanksgiving for some reason.
I feel you on that. I take medication that make me gain weight, but I lost thirty pounds in three months by working at a caregiving facility, then another five pounds at the pet store where I don't have enough time to eat. But I eat a ton of fast food and really unhealthy foods too.

I'd recommend not starving yourself, MountainDewed...What's helped me to lose weight without exercising is to increase fruits and veggies, eat healthy meals that represent all food groups, limiting alcohol use, and limiting junk food or unhealthy food. It's really tough to do just that, so pick your battles and know when to splurge and when to withold. I really loved eating different fruits and veggies and healthy finger foods or healthy snacking foods.

Then once I got used to that...and now with my upcoming smoking cessation, I went for lots of walks. At my grandparents the high school track was across the street, so I'd walk or run five miles and increased from there, and then where I live now I'd tell myself that I'm doing this to build up my lungs, and I loved going for walks every day with all sorts of things to look at and many hills to overcome...the walks were so important for smoking cessation because my lungs can't handle vigorous exercise while smoking. I made quite the journey last time I quit. I started by overcoming the smallest hill, and within a couple months I was tackling the biggest hill.

Smoking cessation is another New Year's Resolution, and I am going to find myself exercising a lot because I really do need to build up strength in my lungs and my whole body too. I am really, really looking forward to going on walks and excercising more often once I quit smoking.
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Default Dec 24, 2021 at 07:13 PM
  #4
I got off my meds and am still having issues. I planned on applying to jobs as soon as the new years hit but now everyone is advising me not to because of omacron. So I plan on using that time to better myself. But working would help a lot.

I did lose 28 pounds since Thanksgiving 2020 but I've gained 8 back since this Thanksgiving which isnt really a big deal but I just worry.

I count carbs and calories and my sodium on the My Fittness Pal App and I drink an entire pitcher of Lipton decaf iced tea a day. I try to eat high protein low carb stuff like tuna and hard boiled eggs but sometimes I just want a chili cheese dog.

People are telling me not to worry about it during the holidays though so I've put the scale away for the next week.
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LiteraryLark
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Default Dec 24, 2021 at 07:33 PM
  #5
Yes holidays are a time to splurge. Especially with large family holidays it can be offensive to be so restricting. I was on a strict diet during the last big family holiday and I took very small portions from each dish that my relatives made. I don't want to hurt their feelings and part of dieting is allowing yourself to enjoy the foods you love or the holidays and stay on track.
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Default Dec 24, 2021 at 07:51 PM
  #6
Put more of my T’s suggestions into practice
Giving my dad less mental real estate
Work on enjoying saving money more than spending it
Become less closeted - basically, to cast off more shackles from my upbringing that have only served to hold me back
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Default Dec 24, 2021 at 08:47 PM
  #7
We have many of the same thoughts Roxanne!!! We can do it!
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LiteraryLark
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Default Dec 24, 2021 at 09:57 PM
  #8
I'm learning how to better save and budget my money and I was in a toxic situation with someone who made me hide my true self.
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Default Dec 25, 2021 at 12:15 AM
  #9
1. Eventually deep cleaning my entire apartment.
2. Eventually organizing all of my storage cages (down the hall from my apartment and not shared with anyone else, though still in public spaces that require masks).
3. Eventually scanning, saving, and shredding all of my papers that I'm not keeping, such as receipts and product manuals.
4. Eating healthier.
5. Reversing high blood sugars.
6. Improving physical health.
7. Walking more outside.
8. Taking vitamins more consistently.
9. Paying off all of my credit cards and then saving to move.
10. Using up all of my nonperishables or donating some of them. I plan to eat more fresh fruits and vegetables, or at least frozen fruits and vegetables going forward.
11. Improving my daily and weekly routines.
12. Learning how to read music.
13. Learning how to read Shakespeare.
14. Setting aside things for donations.
15. Losing weight.
16. Getting the doctor visits I need out of the way (physical, PAP, colposcopy, vision w/contacts exam, mammogram).
17. Getting the 4th booster in time.
18. Getting my flu shot when needed.
19. Going through my vaccines list to see what is coming due for my other vaccine needs.
20. Organizing my hard drives (all external now).
21. Planning an out-of-state move either in 2022 or later.
22. Planning to reconnect with my biological daughter (she was adopted).
23. Continuing to wear N95 or N99 masks wherever I go during the daytime, with a different type of mask on top of that (i.e., double-masking).
24. Continuing to use goggles to protect my eyes from debris and anything potentially falling on me whenever I'm working on dumping trash, organizing my storage, dumping recycling, getting mail, etc., in the middle of the night. If I'm just going out for a walk outside, I won't wear goggles at all.
25. Continuing to maintain good hygiene, including hand washing to reduce pathogens and showering after returning from any outing.
26. Being debt-free by the end of the year.
27. Finding a "reverse diabetes" plan to prevent my getting diagnosed with prediabetes. I meet the lower range for prediabetes, but I'm 2 points or whatever short of being diagnosed with prediabetes. I'm doing what I can to reverse it, but slowly. It requires a lifestyle change, not a one-time diet.
28. Finding a treatment plan (or even self-help plan) for my chronic fatigue syndrome.
29. Continuing in psychotherapy online - twice a week - if my T allows.
30. Continuing music therapy online - once a week for individual, and once a week for group - all online since they are in another state.
31. Continuing recreation rehab activities through the VA.
32. Continuing check-ins at the local Vet Center.
33. Maintaining the in-person friends I have and trying to slowly build from there.
34. Maintaining the long-distance friends I've had over the years and decades. That's a given.
35. Removing toxic relationships and not giving room to let them fester in my life, especially during these pandemic and stressful times. I don't need constant discord, arguments, and risky behaviors around me.
36. Reinventing my purpose and exploring that. What I used to want to do is no longer my goal. My career plans are gone - a loss that I'm going to take a year to grieve over, even though I've lost this plan for a while now, but it was more official since 2020. I haven't been able to grieve over this properly, so I plan to find support groups for that. I won't have a true purpose in life for a while. This pandemic has brought too many obstacles to my life, and the future remains uncertain.
37. Sticking to my boycotting certain businesses and enterprises and social media sites.
38. Finding new television shows to watch and/or catch up on, and finding new movies to watch.
39. Using music as a tool for energy, relaxation, healing, and mood modulation.
40. Continuing the coping skills and building from there while also asking my T about any new directions she can take in our treatment plan together.
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Default Dec 25, 2021 at 01:29 AM
  #10
Thank you, Lark I’m sorry you were also held back by a toxic situation and ended up hiding yourself. It feels good to emerge from that! Merry Christmas to everyone here, and happy new year!
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Default Dec 25, 2021 at 01:50 AM
  #11
New Year's resolutions seem intimidating to me. I prefer the one day at a time approach from the 12 steps, so I will continue to eat healthy and exercise one day at a time. Eventually I hope to reverse the prediabetes and get back to a healthy weight.
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Default Dec 25, 2021 at 01:51 AM
  #12
I dont do new years resolutions because studies have shown that they have the highest failure rate when it comes to sticking with them. IMO making a habit change or setting a goal another time or day has a greater chance of success because there isnt that enormous pressure to do it when everyone else does it and then beat yourself up if you fail. My bday is in feb and that is when i tend to try and make changes or set goals. The other thing is many of us (in particular people with mental disorders) "over-goal" ourselves wanting to make a huge change or way to0 many changes without realizing how hard it is. Making one realistic goal with multiple mini goals to get there is your best bet. Whatever your goal is or resolution is, do NOT join any FB groups or other social media groups because on the surface it *seems* like a good idea until you start comparing yourself to others who seem to have all this wonderful success. Its a recipe for self loathing.

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LiteraryLark
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Default Dec 25, 2021 at 02:25 AM
  #13
Sarah, you make a great point.

My birthday is December 21st, and I like to think about how I want to spend the next year and where I see myself in the next year.

I am always reevaluating where I am at in my goals, the little goals I check in every week to a month and the big goals I check in every three months. Every new twist in my life I sit down and think about how it's working with my goals.

I have found making too many goals to be overwhelming (like this year I am putting way too much on my plate...but this year is the big 30 and it's a huge deal for me).

BUT I try to keep a major goal in each important aspect of my life and set mini goals to reach so that overall I am taking care of myself as a whole.

Personally, I don't like telling people my goals...to me it's a personal thing. My T is the only person I really tell because she helps me stay motivated and work through my issues with my goal.

I am someone who is extremely goal-orientated. I enjoy setting goals even it's a minute thing. I enjoy setting goals in all aspects of my life because I love improving myself and the sense of accomplishment I feel.

I've been doing goal setting for over ten years and another thing that makes me give up on goals is if I'm not fully motivated or interested in doing it. For years I've been telling myself to drink more water, and I just can't get myself to do it.
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Default Dec 26, 2021 at 09:44 AM
  #14
I have never been in the habit of making resolutions, kind of like I don't give up anything for Lent. Doing anything like that makes breaking it so much easier.

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Default Dec 26, 2021 at 11:21 AM
  #15
Don't do new years resolutions. If something comes up throughout the year, it gets changed as necessary. Life for me is a work in progress (BTW, I seldom use shopping lists either)

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Default Dec 28, 2021 at 07:57 AM
  #16
I never make new year's resolutions

find I just can't follow them
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Default Jan 01, 2022 at 10:09 AM
  #17
Hi LiteraryLark! Great question. I want to read 29 books this year. I got back into reading last year & it’s been a huge source of comfort to me. I make a point of reading fiction. It’s like a mental vacation I need. Happy New Year!
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Default Jan 01, 2022 at 12:12 PM
  #18
Well my resolution for 2021 was to quit smoking. Which I did in March. I've packed on 25 lbs since What Are Your New Year's Resolutions?. Not so much a resolution, but I think 2022 I'm going to have to get more active and drop some weight.

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Default Jan 01, 2022 at 09:41 PM
  #19
Just the regular goals I've already been working on.
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Default Jan 02, 2022 at 12:06 PM
  #20
1. This year I want to try out anything I’ve procrastinated for a very long time—but deep down actually want.
2. This year I want to be my number on supporter for myself—to accept myself, and love myself better.
3. This year I want to keep being happy, and keep making those I love happy.

Of course, I’d totally do things as great as I can like my job, fam, work etc but I guess those are a ‘must’ do everyday not a new goal to strive
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