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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Ga
Posts: 13,936
19 34 hugs
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Apr 14, 2008 at 02:04 PM
#1
An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. Older Woman: Oh, I see. Officer: Can I see your license please? Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Officer: Don't have one? Olde r Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving. Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please . Older Woman: I can't do that. Officer: Why not? Older Woman: I stole this car. Officer: Stole it? Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner. Officer: You what? Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 po lice cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle. Older woman: Is there a problem sir? Officer 2: One of my officers told me that y ou have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am? Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned. Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines t he license. He looks quite puzzled. Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too!!!! Don't Mess With Old Ladies __________________ He who angers you controls you! |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2005
Location: Kansas
Posts: 3,841
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Apr 14, 2008 at 02:08 PM
#2
Having been pulled over for speeding this past week on the way to work, I especially enjoyed this.
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Ga
Posts: 13,936
19 34 hugs
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Apr 14, 2008 at 02:50 PM
#3
Jane you bad girl you! lol happy to make you laugh anytime my sweet!
__________________ He who angers you controls you! |
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Elder
Member Since Mar 2008
Location: Indiana
Posts: 7,416
16 19 hugs
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Apr 14, 2008 at 03:02 PM
#4
__________________  Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? Thought I was the only one." C.S. Lewis visit my blog at http://gimmeice.psychcentral.net |
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Grand Member
Member Since Apr 2008
Location: PA, USA
Posts: 959
16 |
Apr 14, 2008 at 03:04 PM
#5
hahahaha!!! That was just way too funny!!!! I loved it!
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Apr 14, 2008 at 09:18 PM
#6
Thanks for the best laugh since......my last speeding ticket!!!!
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Magnate
Member Since Dec 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 2,856
17 17 hugs
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Apr 14, 2008 at 09:24 PM
#7
OOOMMMGGGGOOOOSSSSHHH! That was so funny I was laughing out loud!!!
Thanks for that!!!!  officer
__________________ "The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open."  Don’t look where you fall, but where you slipped. 
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Account Suspended
Member Since Feb 2008
Location: U.K.
Posts: 6,767
16 |
Apr 14, 2008 at 09:25 PM
#8
LMAO nice one bebop.
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Apr 2008
Location: some where
Posts: 1,733
16
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Apr 14, 2008 at 09:33 PM
#9
ROFL
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Ga
Posts: 13,936
19 34 hugs
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Apr 15, 2008 at 01:18 AM
#10
I am so happy I could make you guys laugh! that is my goal in life is to bring laughter. I will search for more.
__________________ He who angers you controls you! |
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Grand Member
Member Since Oct 2007
Location: Some place beyond myself, West Virginia
Posts: 999
16
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Apr 15, 2008 at 10:48 AM
#11
hahahaha!!
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Poohbah
Member Since Jul 2007
Location: California
Posts: 1,494
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Apr 15, 2008 at 11:05 AM
#12
Lol I've heard that one before.
My friend told me something about old people and that is: they need to be listened to. __________________ Speak the truth. Seek the truth. Be the truth.
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Q&A Leader
Member Since Jan 2006
Location: Here
Posts: 94,092
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Apr 15, 2008 at 11:27 AM
#13
Good one bebop! 
__________________  Pegasus Got a quick question related to mental health or a treatment? Ask it here General Q&A Forum “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein |
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Magnate
Member Since Aug 2006
Posts: 2,904
17
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Apr 17, 2008 at 09:06 PM
#14
That was a good one bebop!!!
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: Ga
Posts: 13,936
19 34 hugs
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Apr 17, 2008 at 09:29 PM
#15
ty
__________________ He who angers you controls you! |
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