[radio_flyer]

One of the tenants at my son's house is a 22 or 23 year old young man. He hasn't paid rent for two months. I got to know him and had a chat with him because I was concerned that he'd have no place to go, because my son's dad was ready to tell him to leave. I told the young man he had to get a job no later than the middle of June and start paying what he owed because he was soon to get notice to leave.

He got a job temping. But the problem is when I was visiting he brought a gun in the living room to clean and one of the rules of the house is no guns..He said he keeps the gun in his car and doesn't bring it inside...I told him that I wanted to talk to his mother to see if she knew he carries a gun..I don't know if he is responsible enough to have a gun. I am worried about it. I should tell my son's dad about the gun. RIGHT?

I feel so stupid because I didn't tell him the gun had to go. I don't know what is wrong with me. I know what I should do. And I don't know why I am asking for advice. I just know I am afraid of guns and is that reason enough to tell him his gun has to go????

[lenjan]

YES you should tell. If he knew going in that no guns was one of the rules of the house, and he's violating it, that's plenty of reason to kick him out. The property owner has the right to enforce whatever rules he or she pleases on his or her property.

I applaud your compassion in giving the young man a break, but it sounds like he's taken advantage of it.

[AAAAA]

Boy I’d be inclined to cut the boy some slack about the rent if you were able to afford it. However the addition of the gun, yeah, I’d definitely give him notice. In my own experience the owner of the gun may be fully aware of gun safety procedures, but guests may not be. Sounds like a recipe for trouble.

[bebop]

while these are grown men he needs to follow the rules of the house.

[radio_flyer]

I am sure the "no guns and no drugs" policy was not mentioned when my son rented the room to him. We were talking about something and some how guns were mentioned and that is when I said no guns were aloud in the house. I guess when he cleaned his gun in the living room was a way of showing me he had one. I kept my cool but inside I was churning. I did mention I needed to talk to his mother to make sure she knew he was carrying a gun. It seems, by what he says that his step dad hunts elk and whatever and he comes from a "gun carrying" family.

I went out on a limb trying to give him a chance to get caught up on his rent and now it looks like he will have to leave because of the gun. I do feel bad. But I really shouldn't be feeling so bad because I found out his parents live only 30 miles from my son's house.

I am going back to my son's house tonight to finish some yard work and I will tell him that I have to tell "the owner" he has a gun and they will have to work it out. That way it leaves me out of the middle. I have learned over the years being in the "middle" of anything is a "bad thing" because the one in the middle always gets bitten.

Thanks candybear for your advice. It always helps hearing what other folks think. I think I was "overwhelmed" with feelings. On one hand trying to help out this young man and the other hand this gun issue. It seems my heart (feelings) and my "head" could not get in agreement.

[radio_flyer]

You are right when you say "sounds like a recipe for trouble". All of the "tenants" are students and they do party a lot. All the drinking and loud parties... Scares me to even think that an intoxicated guest find that gun and start shooting everything/everyone in sight..

My son has 45 noise violations. The last noise violation was when one of the tenants gave a wild party and the neighbors called the police. He has to go to court on this one....Could be as much as a $500 fine...Oddly enough, my son was not at the party, he just happened to be getting home when the police were there....

The "owner" of the house is my son's dad. My son doesn't get the house and mortgage in his name until he graduates. Who knows when he will graduate. He has been working on this CS degree for years and seems like he can't pass this one math class. Might as well call my son a "professional student" rolls eyes... not sure how much or how long one can keep the encouraging up when all he does is party and drink...He is 27 this July.. Hope he graduates before he is 50.....have a headache already just typing this........

[nothemama8]

might be a good idea to ask if the gun is registered if not tell him the gun goes NOW

[radio_flyer]

I did ask him if the gun was registered. He said in Virginia guns do not have to be registered. I am checking that one out today..

[radio_flyer]

"grown men" is *debatable* But then I am almost three times their age and I feel so like a child, trembling in my shoes, having to tell him the gun goes or he and his gun can leave together.....but then I should chill, because I will leave it all up to my son's dad to deal with.......

I do agree.. He needs to follow the rules of the house.........

Thanks bebop for responding..

[gimmeice]

(((((((((((((( Radio_Flyer )))))))))))))))
I am sorry that you are being put all this stress, I think it's a good idea to let your son's father handle the situation.

[AAAAA]

Alcohol and guns do not mix! I also come from a "gun carrying" family, which is why my rules are NO GUNS IN THE HOUSE. My father was a police officer with a loaded gun in every room growing up. I remember when my brother was a teen and one of his friends had been drinking and noticed the gun on the wall and started branishing it. That was enough to scare me straight. We had been brought up with gun safety, but not everyone was.

Luckily when I had my first child, my father installed a massive gun safe in the house, no taking chances with your grandchildren.

I don't blame you for not wanting to be in the middle. I'd make sure everyone signs a rental agreement now with the rule, no guns clearly stated.

All I can say is if I told a tenant no guns, and he took that as an invitation to clean his gun, I'd see that as a threat, but that's just me. Hope the situation resolves soon.

[splitimage]

I'd say let your son's Dad deal with it. Sounds like a whole heap of potential trouble to me.

splitimage

[ECHOES]

perhaps he could sell the gun to pay his rent.

[AAAAA]

LOL good idea Echoes! Although, in hubby's family (we're the black sheep, no guns for reasons previously stated) you don't sell gun, ever, no matter how tough things get.

Before hubby went into the Navy, they hunted every year at the family's camp. When we PCS'd to OR, and were low on cash hubby sold the guns that he bought while in HS. His father was furious, "if you need money, ask, you don't sell your guns!"

[radio_flyer]

lol ECHOES.......btw, that is a good idea.. lol

He made a snide remark this morning that we should be buying a new water heater instead of siding for the house..( next week the siding will be delivered.. I can't wait. The house is going to look soooooooooooo nice ) He sure complains a lot for someone who doesn't pay his rent or utilities.

He has a "smart mouth" at times. I do believe I will suggest he sell his guns to pay the rent should he continue with his lil snide remarks......It would be "priceless" just to see the expression on his face...

Yesterday we had a few "cold words" and I can't exactly remember what it was all a bout. All I could think of today was how it would feel to be shot. Thinking he was "irked" and would come home and shoot me. He did come home with a gift of a pack of cigarettes and paid part of the rent that is due..
wipes brow....

Guess when I go home is when I will mention the gun to the owner.............

[radio_flyer]

I can't "read" this guy. Even before I knew about the gun something just doesn't feel right and I can't put my finger on it. Not sure if it is just his "way of saying things" or he could be "trouble".I have so many conflicting thoughts running about in my head about him that it confuses me. Sooooo, I will gently put the whole matter in my son's father's hands...and lay low..

[AAAAA]

That sounds like a really good idea. I wouldn’t provoke him, especially since he gives you an uneasy feeling. Just have the homeowner give him notice to vacate based upon non-payment/late payments of rent. I hope he doesn’t turn out to be a bigger problem than his is now. Depending upon the state you’re in, getting him out of the house may be difficult. Make sure your i’s are dotted and t’s are crossed.

[radio_flyer]

ya know.. when i asked him if he had his rent check, he said he wasn't talking to me and that he would talk to bob, "my son's dad" about it and stormed out the front door..

little did he know that "bob" was outside waiting for his check.. think he was a tad surprised. he gave bob the check, which unfortunately brings him up to date on his rent. he was sooo angry and got in his car and reved his engine and drove off really fast.

with all the fuss this kid created, i blurted out, "he has a gun". bob said "what", was very upset and said that could be dangerous... he said something that you can't carry a loaded gun in a car and i told him the kid said he keeps his gun loaded all the time.. so bob now knows...wipes brow.. and he said he'd take care of it and he was glad i told him and thanked me..the ball is now in bob's court.

i feel so much better that the owner knows about the gun.. should anything have happened i would have not been able to "forgive" myself, knowing about the gun.. we do not want "guns" in the rental house

[ECHOES]

Yay, good that the truth is out there.

Someone with a temper and a gun... such a dangerous mix.

I wonder if he will be looking for a new place to rent soon

[AAAAA]

I hope Bob is able to take him to tenant court to get rid of him. He sounds like BAD news. Did the check clear?

[radio_flyer]

yes.. i do believe he will be leaving soon.. bob said he will ask him to leave at the end of this month..bob is a tad upset over the gun and when he saw this guy's anger, he decided it would be best for this young man to leave. his parents live 15 miles from here.

i am thinking there is a reason his parents are willing to pay his 3 months rent that is due, rather than ask him to come home. thinking it is an "attitude" problem... because he sure has one here.....

[radio_flyer]

i don't think bob will need to take him to court to get him to leave. thinks the guy will leave when bob tells him that things are just not working out..

check was deposited today so will know in a few days if it clears. think his parents paid his rent.. guess he needs to tell them utilities are due..

well, he isn't the greatest tenant. he is one smart mouth, arrogant young man. guess you are right... he is bad news...will be "relieved" when he leaves...