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Old Oct 19, 2008, 11:25 AM
hurtingintn hurtingintn is offline
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Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change ! The chicken wanted change !

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

SARAH PALIN: As a Mayor and Governor of Alaska I have fought against and stopped the good old boy chickens attempts to cross the road against God's will. It appears I have not fully succeeded. Where's my gun?

**** CHENEY: Where's my gun?

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road with what is certainly weapons of mass destruction, perhaps nuclear. We must bomb the chicken before it attacks us and destroys our American way of life!

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe a chicken crossed the road, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road to verify the crossing.

BILL O'REILLY, FOX NEWS: Another left-wing chicken has crossed the road, probably looking for another government relocation handout. Get over it buddy, as far as I'm concerned, you're on your own.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty ! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for me.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken200 9 , which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken200 9 . This new platform is much more stable and will never need to reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
Thanks for this!
cantstopcrying, gimmeice

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  #2  
Old Oct 19, 2008, 12:47 PM
Orange_Blossom
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why did the chicken cross the road?


why did the chicken cross the road?
  #3  
Old Oct 19, 2008, 12:59 PM
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Miracle1986 Miracle1986 is offline
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That is classic!!!!! *wipes tears (caused by laughing so hard) from eyes*
  #4  
Old Oct 19, 2008, 01:19 PM
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SeptemberMorn SeptemberMorn is offline
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LOL That was great!
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  #5  
Old Oct 19, 2008, 01:32 PM
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onlymedid onlymedid is offline
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Posts: 2,856


I needed a good laugh today!
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Don’t look where you fall, but where you slipped.
  #6  
Old Oct 19, 2008, 04:14 PM
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Zloppy Zloppy is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2008
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 91
Haha. Those were hilarious. I liked the Hilary Clinton one best.
  #7  
Old Oct 19, 2008, 10:48 PM
Anonymous81711
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which came first, the chicken or the road?
  #8  
Old Oct 20, 2008, 08:08 AM
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radio_flyer radio_flyer is offline
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Posts: 5,584
Lol........
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  #9  
Old Oct 22, 2008, 09:18 PM
matsuri matsuri is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2008
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oh wow where did you find this or did you make it all up??
  #10  
Old Oct 22, 2008, 09:54 PM
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Zloppy Zloppy is offline
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Posts: 91
The egg and some rocks
  #11  
Old Oct 22, 2008, 10:29 PM
I_WMD I_WMD is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2007
Posts: 4,156
And a * cluck * here and a *Cluck * there ,, >> Here a Cluck ,, there a cluck >> ,, everywhere a Cluck >>... :O >>> eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep T R U C K !!!!!!

shoulda stand on my own side of the road ............

wmd.
  #12  
Old Oct 23, 2008, 03:03 PM
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Perzephone Perzephone is offline
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Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 350
And this whole time I thought the chicken crossed the road to show the possum it could be done!
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