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Junior Member
Member Since Dec 2019
Location: Ohio
Posts: 20
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#1
Does anyone else here feel that there is no good choice in whether or not to take meds or not. If I am not on any antidepressant I have issues that are very hard to manage. Sometimes almost impossible to manage... such as when winter comes and I am more isolated the depression gets much worse, or the anxiety that I suffer from gets much worse if I am stressed or have something that is hard to deal with. However, over the last 30 years or so I have tried every antidepressant and combos knows to man I think. While on these meds there have been varying side effects.. some very bad and some not, some that I could not tolerate at all. None of the meds helped much for my depression except for keeping me alive, but still depressed. So... I guess what I am asking is. Which is better? Of course the DR's and I suppose most people would say that taking the meds is the best thing to do. Both options are miserable. Bad life on and bad life off... just in different ways. Talking to people that have not been through this, and especially for so long, they don't get what hell it is in both of these situations. Anyone have any thoughts on this? Oh, and no, I am not suicidal or asking if it is ok to be. I just feel like it is this damned if you do and damned if you don't scenario.
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Skeezyks, WastingAsparagus
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Member Since Oct 2015
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#2
Yeah... I sort-of get this. I've been on antidepressants in the past both alone & in combination with other psych meds. The only one I took that I felt was of any real benefit was Cymbalta. (I still had to work at keeping myself "up". But the Cymbalta seemed to "keep a floor under me", as I used to like to say, so that if I began to crash it would kick my sorry butt back up to a manageable level.) The rest of the psych med's I tried were more trouble than they were worth. I don't take anything anymore.
In my case, I've never been a person who was so disabled by depression that I couldn't get up & do what needed to be done at some level. (It often wasn't pretty. But I did it.) On the other hand, I've also made 2 major suicide attempts. So there's that to be taken into consideration as well. However a lot of my major concerns are things there simply aren't medications for. No matter what psych med's I might take, they wouldn't change anything. So I just carry on as best I can. I obviously can't say whether or not you should reconsider taking antidepressants. You clearly know what both the options & the obstacles are. I think all you can do is to consider if you're able to function at some acceptable level without psych med's. If so, perhaps it's best not to go back there. On the other hand, if you find you simply can't arrange your life such that you can function at an acceptable level day-to-day, then perhaps giving antidepressants another try makes sense. In my case, over the years, I've become an almost totally reclusive person. And keeping to myself is one of the things that has made it possible for me to manage. The lifestyle I lead wouldn't work for everyone. (I'm old. So that helps.) But it's something I accept as being one means of keeping myself off psych med's. __________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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Werewoman
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Gib2018, WastingAsparagus
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Student of Life
Member Since Mar 2014
Location: South America
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#3
Yeah, I understand what you're saying. I mean, I often come to the conclusion that I'd be better off without meds. Lately, however, I've realized that they do help me quite a bit, as whenever I try to go off of them, I get bad symptoms almost immediately. I know that some of this could be withdrawal effects, so it's often hard to sort out, but usually I feel like a blob of nothing when I'm off of psych meds. I guess I'd really like to explore what life could be like without psych meds, because I feel like there's so much more spiritual stuff to discover out there than just maintaining my illness my whole life, you know? It's a tough decision for me to make, too, as I feel like when my doctor and therapist urge me to take my meds, I don't know what to do other than to listen to them. I don't know. It's tough.
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Gib2018
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Community Support Team Member Since Mar 2006
Location: Ontario, Canada
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#4
I kind of struggle with this too. I've been on meds for 20 years now, so I'm completely physically addicted. I'm slowly tapering off one, and while I'm not having really bad tapering side effects because we're really going slowly, my brain still feels weird.
If I were to go off everything, it would probably be a multi year project and I have no idea of how I'd feel, or how long it would take my brain to achieve some sort of equilibrium. And I risk finding myself right back where I was before going on them. So I guess for better or worse, I'm on them for the indefinite future. splitimage |
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Gib2018
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Junior Member
Member Since Jul 2020
Location: pa
Posts: 18
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#5
I really struggle with taking meds. I do see how they help but I am not one to take medicine. My journal works which I started again. I don't like therapy because I am not comfortable talking not even to my husband sometimes.
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