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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jul 2003
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,511
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Sep 18, 2010 at 09:17 PM
#1
October 9th it will be one year to my brother's suicide. I still haven't dealt with it. I feel tremendous guilt for being on the outs with him and not making things right. I have been talking to my step-niece and it is painful.
My niece doesn't want to talk to me especially about my brother. I am filled with fresh loss. Last year, my parents told me four days before my birthday. I think that was wrong. Every year will be ruined now. Please keep me and my family in your prayers. I will keep trudging on. Thank you. Mary Alice |
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Major Dog Lover
Member Since Aug 2010
Location: San Francisco Bay Area, California
Posts: 33,515
(SuperPoster!)
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Sep 18, 2010 at 10:07 PM
#2
I'm so sorry for your loss and for your pain. I wish you strength to get through this difficult time
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Member
Member Since Sep 2010
Location: canada
Posts: 122
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Sep 18, 2010 at 11:45 PM
#3
Have you received any grief therapy it may help decrease the pain some
I too lost my brother the end of october and i know the guilt and sadness stays but the pain will lessen some. Grief councilling will help you cope with it all take care and i will definetly pray for you and your family for strength and healing take care |
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Mental Wellness Mensch
Member Since Apr 2009
Location: I live with myself. Because that is all I can depend on. Everthing around me changes.
Posts: 3,439
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Sep 19, 2010 at 08:58 PM
#4
Quote:
I am thinking of you tonight. You are not trudging alone. billi __________________ The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness!  |
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: South Africa
Posts: 67,808
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Sep 20, 2010 at 03:16 AM
#5
My thoughts are with you Mary Alice.
__________________  Crying isn't a sign of weakness. It's a sign of having tried too hard to be strong for too long. |
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2008
Location: Sunny East Coast Florida!
Posts: 6,873
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Sep 21, 2010 at 01:09 AM
#6
mary alice, experiencing the suicide of a loved one takes time. there are many questions we have that we have that will go unanswered. using a T to get through the grief process would/can help.
not to sound heartless but if we choose "every year will be ruined now", quoting you. but it doesn't mean we have to choose that mindset. there are ways to be able to process your loss so you can get on with the rest of your life. i hope you can find that road...i did..and it doesn't take away from my missing my loved one. it just makes me able to cope and move on. __________________ Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jul 2003
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,511
20 8 hugs
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Sep 22, 2010 at 08:49 PM
#7
Thanks everyone. I am hoping as time goes by, it will indeed heal. It doesn't help that I have been without a T for 2 months. I will work on making things more able to cope. My parents need to know that I am here for them.
Mary Alice |
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