[cocoa58]

I deal with loss constantly. I work hard to try and build a new life - I moved to a new state in 2006 and getting a stable, good life here has really been a problem and a challenge and a half!

I had a nice stable life in Minnesota. But I moved to the mountains of Colorado - and while this may sound glamourous, what it is, is just plain hard!

First of all, mountain people don't socialize much. I have recently found a church that is fairly friendly and this is as "lucky" about this as I have gotten.

Its easy to be isolated up here, and that's the worst thing for me.

So what have I lost? I lost friends, social support, church support (although I am regaining this slowly), a decent house (I now live in what is considered the "ghetto" of my small mountain community - before I was middle class and in a nice neighborhood), my beautiful flower, vegetable and herb gardens that I loved to work in, a job that worked for me, fun festivals and things that my husband and I enjoyed, camping we enjoyed (camping in Colorado is definitely for the "tough"), and also my health - because living at altitude just puts bad physical stress on your body. Its really affected me in a negative way with my health.

And now we have spent so much money coming here and trying to get established, not to mention a lot we lost with the economy crash - we have to stay put. There aren't good options to move.

So - I've also had death/losses - my brother's suicide in 2005 being the worst.

Its a lot of loss to deal with. And I deal with it alone, everyday. Its a bummer.

[sundog]

I'm really sorry you're dealing with so much grief and loss (((((((cocoa))))) Moving is so stressful, and even more so if it turns out that you don't really like the place you've moved to. I'm so sorry you're missing your old home so much. I hope things get easier. And I hope we can offer you some support!

[Aunt Donna]

We are here for you.

[Miracle1986]

I'm so sorry cocoa