[cowboy1]

There is nothing in this world to hold the one you love as they give you a last glance in the eye as they die in your hand's. To know that they are gone and there was nothing you could do to protect them. You feel like a failure and all your emotion's change right on the spot. To see someone that was fine one day and now not the next. I just can't get over the look and the way it happened. To love someone with all your heart and soul and body to watch them faid away to where they go and never see them again. I hope I can do something some day but at this point in my life I cant do nothing. It's like im stuck in the corner and can't get out. My heart feel's like someone reached into my chest and pulled ot out then STOMPED ON IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN. Then slaped me in the face just for spite. I am confussed and angery and don't know wich end is up anymore. I feel like im dieing inside slowly little by little till there will be no more to save.

[pegasus]

(((((((( cowboy1 ))))))))

I'm so sorry for your loss. Grief is such a hard thing to cope with. You have every right to feel angry. At least you were able to hold her in your arms when she died, I think this is something that you can feel some comfort in, in future.