Anniversary of my mom's death is September 1st...she passed on in 1988...

This time of year is really sad for me. My mother passed on September 1st, 1988...the hardest thing, still, for me is never getting to go to her funeral(she was living in Florida at the time)and never being told where she was buried. I wish I could have gone to her funeral, and sometimes it gets to me that I was not even given the chance to go(which I have to wonder whether my sister was worried that if I went, I would 'decompensate' or my boarding home told her that I might not do well I really think it was horrible if they denied me the chance to get REAL closure because they thought I would 'break' like a fragile piece of glass instead of using my supports)I still cry over my mom's death, and wonder if she was suffering, or whether she passed on in peace, and if she ever knew I still loved her even though she lost me due to her alcoholism..I'm crying right now as I'm posting this. I even have a hard time listening to my roommate talk about how happy his childhood was when all I knew was how I was taken from my family on the THEORY that 'oh she might end up an alcoholic, her mom is'

I wonder if it all ever gets better, if I will ever get closure, if I will ever find out why things happened the way they did?

Lillian Kelly, rest in peace...even though your addiction put me(and you) through some horrible things...I still love you.

((((((( HUGS ))))))) ~ ~ ~ ~ ((((((( HUGS )))))))

I understand for my daughter passed away in 1987, in May.... and I was not there when she was first taken to the hospital, I was many states away staying with a friend after I had a mental breakdown.... I still miss her and I never got to say Good Bye or I Love You - not to were she could still hear me.

LoVe,
Rhapsody - ((( hugs ))

I'm so sorry.

It's hard to get over loss, Kim. Loss and closure are so personal that no one can predict the length of time it takes to grieve. Especially when it's traumatic.

If your mom didn't know when she walked the earth if you loved her or not...she knows now. Try to hold on to that.

I'm so sorry kimthecatlover... Some people say they try to shield us by hiding things, but they are wrong. I'm sure your mother knew you loved her. Do take care

I lived with my parents until I was six, when they enrolled me in a 'special' school..I was able to spend school breaks with them until I turned twelve.
Fondest memory of my mother is when she got a Seal Point Siamese cat named Koko(my sister had one named Holly)..my mom bought me books about cats and how to care for them. I definitely inherited one of her better interests...

I lost my mom last year and I miss her terribly . Sending you some ((((hugs))))

(((( Kim ))))
(((( Rhapsody ))))
(((( Froggie ))))

My mom died from cancer on Sept 11, 1984. The anniversaries are uncomfortable. My heart goes out to all with lost loved ones.

I think anyone with a mental illness still should have the right to go to their parent's funeral, after all it's a family member that has passed on...and same for getting anything their loved one may have left for them. I had one thing to remember my mother by, her favorite charm bracelet which she gave to me the last time I got to see her. One of my foster parents took it from me and never told me why. Why would a foster parent do that, to try and break off my love for my own mother?

I don't know, Kim... but I'm really sorry

Thinking of you on this anniversary

{{{{{{{{{Kim}}}}}}}} I don't have any wise words for you, just empathy. My mom passed almost a whole month before yours did, Aug. 3. Because of the issues my mom and I never addressed, I still struggle on her anniversary. I mourn for the mother I needed and didn't have... emotionally.

My heart goes out to you.

Thank you, everyone, for the support.

One good thing my mom passed on to me is her love of cats. She had a Seal Point siamese cat named KoKo..when she got the cat, as a kitten, she also bought me a book all about Siamese cats.