[ClimbingOut]

It's been three years already and I'm still depressed and unable to get on with my life. Why can't I move on?

[kaliope]

there is no set time frame. everyone grieves in their own way. have you tried intensive therapy to help you out? take care

[Metalsauce]

There is no such thing as "too long." Beating yourself up by telling yourself that what you're feeling is wrong only makes things worse. If your work or social life is being negatively affected, go see a psychiatrist. Otherwise, just know that it will get better. Be well.

[LyndseyQ]

That's right, there is no time set to grieve. In order to move on, you have to find the core of the situation and start from there.

[ZenHummerXOXOhsp]

Originally Posted by ClimbingOut

It's been three years already and I'm still depressed and unable to get on with my life. Why can't I move on?

It's never too long to still be grieving, just shows how much that person meant to you. I lost my Dad to cardiac arrest over a decade ago and a big piece of my heart is still broken. Life will never be the same w/out him but at least he shared a part of my life for a good 15 yrs. "Mr. Big", that was the name he gave to a divine power, blessed him to be in my life long enough to have left a good memorable impression on me.

Do you write/talk about memories of him/her? Sometimes it's difficult for me to talk about my Dad, because I was away visiting my Aunt when he passed away. The li'l girl in me still for some reason wants to remain in disbelief; in denial that it ever happened. Even though he was in my life for 15 yrs, I still feel like it's unfair and he should've been able to be around longer.

Talking about him is the most healing thing b/c people like my sister say things that comfort me and make so much sense. One thing that stuck w/ me is a law of science that I never connected to bereavement before; she brought it to my attention: "Energy is neither created, nor destroyed." So in a way he is still alive, just not in physical bodily form.

[Offred]

I still miss my Dad. No one around me seems to know how much.

[lizardlady]

Originally Posted by ClimbingOut

It's been three years already and I'm still depressed and unable to get on with my life. Why can't I move on?

Grief has its own timetable and it's different for everyone. My mom's been gone five years and it still hurts. Probably going to hurt the rest of my life.

The fact you say you can't get on with life concerns me though. Does that mean you can't function? If so, you might want to seek some counseling to help.

[Grey Matter]

There is no time line to grief. It simply is. I don't think I will ever get to a point where I do not grieve my brother daily. I think once that is accepted, things actually do become easier.

I agree with lizard. Counseling can help, especially when you find someone who recognizes grief is not a process with a determined start or end.

[pizzolar]

Honestly I don't expect to ever be "over" the loss of my father. I'll learn to cope with the hard parts of the grief, I'll learn to find joy in celebrating his life instead of grieving his loss so hard. But I'll always mourn him, forever.

[stefi91]

I lost my sister almost 6 years ago, and 10 months later my grandmother. Somedays I'm ok, but others, I just want to call them up and talk to them. I think you will always grieve for a lossed loved one, you just slowly learn how to cope with that pain.