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Old 01-17-2021, 04:15 PM   #11
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Default Re: Coming up on my son's birthday

I am so sorry. There is really nothing I can say except I am here and sending you hugs
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Old 01-17-2021, 06:20 PM   #12
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I'm so sorry.
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Old 03-02-2021, 02:53 PM   #13
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Default Re: Coming up on my son's birthday

prettymccute...I lost my son too. It's been two years. I don't think there is any time limit on grief...you feel what you feel. You be you <3

My son was 40, married with a son of his own. (who was 5 at the time of the accident) It was a tragic fiery crash that took him. That's an image I can't get out of my head. That late night phone call is one every parent dreads. We were close. People think it must get better with time but I think it gets worse. I've never gone 2 years without talking to him...maybe 2 days...even 2 weeks...never 2 years.


I don't know how his father would have dealt with. He passed in 2002.

I take comfort in spending time with my grandson. He's smart, sensitive, and clever like his Dad. We talk about his father sometimes. He seems to enjoy it.

Life is different now. We will never be the person we used to be. You lost a big part of your support system when you lost your partner. I get it. I lost both my parents and my sister when I was very young. So...what do we do? We can only do out best and what ever that is on any given day...it's good enough. It doesn't mean that life isn't good. Yes, I'm still sad. I suppose we always will be.


There is no playbook on how to do this. We'll miss our boys all the days of our lives, but I think we can acknowledge our pain and still appreciate all the good things there are....there are many. I put my fake face on and muddle through my day. I guess to put it simply...I'm very very sad but not depressed.

I wish you the very very best!! <3
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Old 03-03-2021, 10:22 AM   #14
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I am sorry for the loss of everyone that has lost a child. That must be a very tough situation.
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Old 03-04-2021, 11:02 PM   #15
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Default Re: Coming up on my son's birthday

I'm sorry, prettymccute. It's understandable that anniversaries in particular can
be hard, especially when we're talking about a child. Maybe mothers are hit the hardest. I know being able to talk and hear about a person who has died can be helpful. It's a shame the other people in your life can't see that.
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Old 03-05-2021, 09:40 AM   #16
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Default Re: Coming up on my son's birthday

Quote:
Originally Posted by Travelinglady View Post
I'm sorry, prettymccute. It's understandable that anniversaries in particular can
be hard, especially when we're talking about a child. Maybe mothers are hit the hardest. I know being able to talk and hear about a person who has died can be helpful. It's a shame the other people in your life can't see that.

Very perceptive and thoughtful of you The face other people see is not who we really are...not how we really feel. Being fake is only for self preservation. If I let my head/heart go there I can't bear it. If I reach down that deep I fear I might not come back. People say I've been strong or "I'm holding up well" They have no idea...but that's ok
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Old 04-01-2021, 01:57 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by prettymccute View Post
It's coming up on my son's birthday. He died almost twelve years ago, right before Easter. It's bothering me so much lately that no one talks about him, or even seems to remember him. I feel like I am the only one who mourns him. I suppose his father might, but we were divorced most of my son's childhood, so I'm not exactly sure how a divorced father would feel, compared with a mom that raised a son to the age of a young man and then he died. He was 27.

I feel like our family history was stolen from us. I look back on pictures, and he's in the middle of everything. He's right there, in all of the memories of our family's past. My remaining sons lost their brother. We were a happy bunch. Now I feel very alone in grieving him. I'm so sad that he's not here. I feel like it shouldn't bother me so much, but I think I will be sad about Tyson being gone until the day I am myself.
I understand. I lost my best friend on Easter when I was just a little girl. I wish that I could take your pain away.
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