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  #51  
Old Jan 17, 2020, 07:10 PM
Skeezyks's Avatar
Skeezyks Skeezyks is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762
Quote:
Originally Posted by UnclesGirl View Post
Hi everyone! I am sorry for everyone's losses. My heart knows the struggle so we'll.
I lost my fiancee 5 years ago. I can't explain the pain I have felt since that day. It has forever changed me. I always speak of my life in two chapters: before the suicide and after the suicide.
I can't think about it for to long or the pain overwhelms me. I have not dealt with this grief much.
I know that finding others that can understand my grief has been so helpful in my journey. So thank you everyone who shared.
@UnclesGirl Here are links to 2 articles, from PC's archives, on the subject of surviving a loved one's suicide:

Guideposts for Surviving a Loved One's Suicide

This Side of Suicide: Using the Written Word to Cope with Loss

And then I thought I would also share with you my personal favorite, among the articles in PC's archives, on the subject of grief & loss:

What My Dog Taught Me about Grief and Loss

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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)

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  #52  
Old Dec 19, 2021, 09:45 PM
Buffy01's Avatar
Buffy01 Buffy01 is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 10,214
Quote:
Originally Posted by Orange_Blossom View Post
Thanks for the links. I'm still a little shaken over my sister-in-law's suicide a few months ago. She left a nine-year-old behind and it hits so close to home that my heart just aches for him. :rain3:
I understand because I loss my brother suicide.
__________________
Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch.

Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live.

This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak.

In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living.

Like love, it's how we know we're alive.

And life goes on.

That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries
Thanks for this!
zapatoes
  #53  
Old Apr 11, 2022, 05:15 PM
MariaSmith8 MariaSmith8 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2022
Location: US
Posts: 1
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebop View Post
I will find and post links here to help deal with suicide

please post responses in a new thread. thanks
Thank you for the link!
  #54  
Old Apr 15, 2022, 08:45 PM
Buffy01's Avatar
Buffy01 Buffy01 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 10,214
Quote:
Originally Posted by Charlie_J View Post
Ok, so I am a survivor of suicide. In 2001, my brother suffered from depression, and had previously been hospitalised for suicide attempts. One and half months prior to his death, he'd been in ICU for a drugs overdose and had escaped without brain damage.

He took another drugs overdose, and this time he was successful. There was some evidence my Dad had tried to recsusitate him (he was a doctor). Later, at his inquest, the pathologist said it was the biggest overdose he had ever seen in his career.

My Dad didn't call anyone. Unbeknown to me he'd been fighting a case of constructive dismissal at his job and was also suffering from depression. He took an overdose of painkillers.

Some days later, when my Mother was worried because she couldn't get an answer on the phone, I opened the door to their house and found them.

If someone you love commits suicide, here are some bits of advice you might find useful.

* It's not your fault.
* That black, physical pain you feel will ease eventually.
* You may be very angry with them at times. This is normal. Don't be ashamed of it.
* Acquaintances, and sometimes even close friends will avoid you. This is because they don't know what to say, and are afraid.
* It takes time, but one day you'll wake up and it won't be your first thought. Promise.
* Just in case you missed it. It's not your fault.
* You will learn to live with it.
* If you're depressed yourself, get help.
* Be kind to yourself.

Some useful links:

http://www.uk-sobs.org.uk/
Suicide Loss Survivors | Alliance of Hope

I may add other useful bits and pieces to this thread as I think of them.

Keep well, ppl :)

:grouphug:
Thank you, This means a lot to me.
__________________
Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch.

Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live.

This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak.

In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living.

Like love, it's how we know we're alive.

And life goes on.

That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries
  #55  
Old Apr 15, 2022, 08:45 PM
Buffy01's Avatar
Buffy01 Buffy01 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 10,214
Quote:
Originally Posted by Charlie_J View Post
Ok, so I am a survivor of suicide. In 2001, my brother suffered from depression, and had previously been hospitalised for suicide attempts. One and half months prior to his death, he'd been in ICU for a drugs overdose and had escaped without brain damage.

He took another drugs overdose, and this time he was successful. There was some evidence my Dad had tried to recsusitate him (he was a doctor). Later, at his inquest, the pathologist said it was the biggest overdose he had ever seen in his career.

My Dad didn't call anyone. Unbeknown to me he'd been fighting a case of constructive dismissal at his job and was also suffering from depression. He took an overdose of painkillers.

Some days later, when my Mother was worried because she couldn't get an answer on the phone, I opened the door to their house and found them.

If someone you love commits suicide, here are some bits of advice you might find useful.

* It's not your fault.
* That black, physical pain you feel will ease eventually.
* You may be very angry with them at times. This is normal. Don't be ashamed of it.
* Acquaintances, and sometimes even close friends will avoid you. This is because they don't know what to say, and are afraid.
* It takes time, but one day you'll wake up and it won't be your first thought. Promise.
* Just in case you missed it. It's not your fault.
* You will learn to live with it.
* If you're depressed yourself, get help.
* Be kind to yourself.

Some useful links:

http://www.uk-sobs.org.uk/
Suicide Loss Survivors | Alliance of Hope

I may add other useful bits and pieces to this thread as I think of them.

Keep well, ppl :)

:grouphug:
Thank you, This means a lot to me.
__________________
Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch.

Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live.

This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak.

In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living.

Like love, it's how we know we're alive.

And life goes on.

That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries
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